(Tommy may have broken his hand and he refuses to go to the hospital for it)
Tommy: Besides I'm better with one hand than most guys are with two.
Mickey: Yeah, I heard that about you.
Tommy: You know how people, like religious people, are always saying stuff like, "Have you found Jesus?"
Tommy: Guess what. I found him.
Mickey: Oh, yeah. Where has he been for the last 2000 years?
Tommy: Apparently my new apartment.