Rescue Me

Season 4 Episode 7


Aired Wednesday 10:00 PM Aug 01, 2007 on FX



  • Quotes

    • Sean: So, listen, bro. I got kind of a confession to make. I know why you're gay.
      Mike: I'm not gay, dude.
      Sean: Yes, you are, come on. And here's why: your parents are gay.
      Mike: What?
      Sean: Your parents were gay, Mike. They're homos, come on.
      Mike: How do you know about that?
      Sean: That's the other part of the confession I was just getting to. You know the fire the other day at your mom's, that burn the whole house down? I broke in that night and I rooted around in the closets and I found all the pictures.
      Mike: Well, nevermind the pictures, are you sayin' that you burned my mom's house down?
      Sean: I'm sorry, dude. I'm really sorry. You can hit me if you want. (Mike slaps him, and the Sean slaps Mike right back)
      Mike: Ow. Asshole. You said I could hit you.
      Sean: I'm sorry, it was a reflex. Jesus. I feel terrible about your mom's house, I really do. It was an accident, Mike. I swear to God.
      Mike: So, that's why the guys are callin' you 'Zippo'.
      Sean: Yeah. So, how pissed are you?
      Mike: I don't know... About the slap?
      Sean: No, about the fire, asshole.
      Mike: Oh, uh... I--I I'm not really that pissed I guess, you know? I mean, to be honest, I... that place was kinda like... it had a lot of bad memories, you know? And-- And I'm kinda happy to be rid of it, I guess.
      Sean: Wow.
      Mike: Yeah. ... You know what, you're wrong about a few things. I'm not gay, and havin' gay parents, doesn't make you gay.
      Sean: Well, it's gotta increase the chances a little bit, don't 'ya think?
      Mike: I don't know. Maybe. Bro, can you just do me a favor?
      Sean: Of course, dude, anything. You name it.
      Mike: Promise?
      Sean: I promise.
      Mike: Can you not tell the guys about my parents?
      Sean: Okay, okay. I.. I wouldn't. I would never... I mean, I kinda already did.
      Mike: You dick! (Sean slaps him) Ow! What are you doing?
      Sean: Sorry. I was anticipating, I can't believe I... are you alright? (puts his hand on Mike's shoulder)
      Mike: Don't touch me, asshole.