Rocko's Modern Life

Season 1 Episode 12

Who's For Dinner? / Love Spanked

Aired Unknown Oct 03, 1993 on Nickelodeon
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Episode Summary


Who's For Dinner?:
Heffer invites Rocko over to his parents' house for dinner. There, Rocko sees just how dysfunctional a family can be. After Rocko tells Heffer that he is actually adopted, he sadly runs away to find his biological family.

Love Spanked:
Rocko tries to get over his crush on his beautiful next-door-neighbor, Melba. Heffer tries to help by setting Rocko up with an assortment of dates (via personals ads), but each and every one of them ends in disaster.


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Tom Kenny

Tom Kenny

Heffer Wolfe, Chuck Roast, Various

Carlos Alazraqui

Carlos Alazraqui

Rocko, Spunky

Linda Wallem

Linda Wallem

Virginia Wolfe, Cindy Wolfe, Rabbit Daughter

Charlie Adler

Charlie Adler

George Wolfe, Grandpa Wolfe, Rabbit Father, Various

Mr. Lawrence

Mr. Lawrence

Peter Wolfe

Trivia, Notes, Quotes and Allusions


  • TRIVIA (2)

    • During the establishing shot where we fade up to the Brandewine Farms and then crossfade over to the stormy tombstone site, it's basically two video-freeze images that crossfade to each other, then the film resumes rolling once it cuts to Heffer walking up the hill.

    • Heffer eats burgers in several episodes. This is supposedly a running gag on the show, since Heffer is a steer.

  • QUOTES (11)

    • (Rocko is on the Love Seat dating show, and one of the judges, a dead corpse, falls onto the "3" button, resulting in that candidate being chosen...)
      Chuck Roast: Before we reveal the candidate selected, let's introduced the two unfortunates NOT chosen...
      (The first window lights up to reveal a pretty giraffe girl, which arouses Rocko...)
      Chuck Roast: There's Dianne, one of our nation's leading rocket scientists, who in her spare time enjoys bungee jumping in a pit of hot whipped cream... (Rocko slurps his tongue lustfully)
      (The second window reveals a female fish...)
      Chuck Roast: Yvonne, date number two, a Pulitzer prize-winning poet, Yvonne claims her only weakness is an unbearable fetish for short wallabies.
      (Yvonne giggles, and Rocko pants and moans, getting more turned on. All that is left now is the third one, who has the silhouette of a pretty human woman in a dress...)
      Chuck Roast: That leaves us with your date... (Rocko takes off but Chuck holds him back) ...who not only LOVES building models of the Titanic and jack-hammering, but is contempt just spending a lot of time on the couch...
      (Rocko is even more aroused than ever as a jackhammer beats inside his head...)
      Chuck Roast: Your date... (the window lights up and the sexy silhouette transforms into...) HEFFER!!!
      (Among seeing it is only Heffer, the hearts in Rocko's eyes burn up, and he flies around like a deflating balloon.)

    • Dad: Why can't you be more like Heffer?
      Peter: What? A 600 pound cow?
      Dad: HE'S NOT A COW! HE'S A STEER!!!

    • Farmer: (to Heffer) Hey, aren't you that guy on the milk cartons? A fam'ly o' wolves have bin lookin' all over fer ya. Must be very worries. Matter o' fact, they have a beaver with 'em.

    • Grandpa Wolfe: I hope you're not letting the beaver eat off the good china, otherwise, we'd have to smash the plates.

    • (Virginia is showing home movies to Rocko and the family)
      Virginia: Ooh, this is Heffer's 5th birthday!
      (The video shows Heffer being blind folded to hit the birthday pinata. Swinging and running way off course, Heffer smacks the bat right into the camera, knocking it out of place. At its current angle, other people run away from Heffer while he still swings the bat towards them.)
      George: Sweet lawsuit, happy birthday.

    • Rocko: Well, I'm stuffed.
      Grampa: I say we eat the beaver!

    • (Heffer approaches Brandewine Farms, where old-sounding thunder rolls over a hill with a tombstone on it.)
      Heffer: My father's... TOMBSTONE! (begins bawling)
      Heffer's real Dad: (appears in a thought bubble above the grave) Hey, quit bawling.
      Heffer: D, d-d-Dad?
      Heffer's real Dad: Yeah, yeah, you heard me. Knock off the crying. That's not my grave!
      (the tombstone reads "HERE LIES A BIG WET CAT - Beloved Husband, 1818-1985")
      Heffer's real Dad: I'm not even dead. I'm living in Canoga Park with Joyce here. (to Joyce) Say hello.
      Joyce: (a female cow) Hi, nice to meet you! You should visit us sometime.
      Heffer: Mom?
      Heffer's real Dad: That's not your mom. Your mom's a car seat in Illinois! Why don't you leave me alone? I'm tired of you kids coming around looking for your "daddy!" I had a million kids that look exactly like you, UGLY! Joyce, come here and clean up after me! (disappears with a crash of thunder)
      Heffer: I guess no one loves me!

    • Heffer: "Heffer", is that even my real name?
      Peter: Dad used to call you "Steak."

    • Dad: So son, how was school today?
      Peter: I quit school 2 years ago.
      Dad: What?!
      Virginia: We were uh, afraid to tell you.

    • Heffer: (writing the personals ad for Rocko) Marsupial with big hairy chest seeking female with same. Will suck the fillings out of your teeth, if you let me. I am adventurous and will try anything once. Twice if you're lucky!

    • Peter: (after George finds out that he's a cheerleader) See, I told ya he'd have a cow! No offense, Heffer.

  • NOTES (5)


    • Nighthawks

      The view of Heffer sitting in the restaurant is a parody of Edward Hooper's painting Nighthawks. This is also the name of the restaurant in the episode.