Darlene Conner Healy
David Jacob "D.J." Conner
Rebecca "Becky" Conner Healy
This is the first episode of Roseanne that has a scene before the introduction.
This episode marks Glenn Quinn's first appearance as Mark Healy.
Dan: Roseanne, I've been thinking. What if my manly abilities aren't the same with the new mattress?
Roseanne: Well you didn't have any problem when we brought home that new kitchen table.
Roseanne: (After Roseanne and Jackie were looking through a magazine) On your way back, pick us up a couple of healing facial masks (Roseanne and Jackie in unison) for our butts!
Mark: You think you can stop me from seeing Becky?
Dan: I think I can stop you from seeing tomorrow.
Dan: You knew exactly what she was going to do and where she was going to go, and you managed to stay one step ahead of her the whole time. You're magnificent, babe.
Roseanne: Yeah, but next time I'm going to have to be even better.
Salesperson: So you decided to get the king sized?
Dan: Na, we'll take the double over there.
Salesperson: For the wife? (beat) all right.
Roseanne: Way to defend my honor, Dan.
Dan: I think he meant me.
Roseanne: Oh...boy did he get you good.
Roseanne: What was once the cradle of our love (pause) is now landfill.
(Everyone first meets Mark)
Darlene: Hey Mark, quick, two plus two?
Darlene: Yeah, I thought so...
Roseanne: Now she knows that Plan A is out the window so she's up there working on Plan B.
Jackie: Maybe it'll be something like 'Judy's parents are Amish and they don't have a phone'.
Roseanne: Hey, I was only 11.
Roseanne: How'd you get in here? You're only 18.
Mark: I got a piece of paper that says I'm 21.
Dan: How old are you when you date our daughter?
Mark: Depends where we go.
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