Roseanne

Season 5 Episode 15

Lanford Daze

1
Aired Tuesday 9:00 PM Jan 26, 1993 on ABC
8.7
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Episode Summary

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Lanford Daze
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As a punishment for vandalizing the "Lunch Box", with dead cow chalk outlines on the sidewalk, Darlene is to serve the meat product at the county fair. When country music star Loretta Lynn shows up for a loose meat sandwich, Darlene refuses to serve her, until Roseanne steps in. Meanwhile, Dan takes a sales job at the fair.moreless

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    John Goodman

    John Goodman

    Dan Conner

    Laurie Metcalf

    Laurie Metcalf

    Jackie Harris

    Sara Gilbert

    Sara Gilbert

    Darlene Conner Healy

    Michael Fishman

    Michael Fishman

    David Jacob "D.J." Conner

    Roseanne Barr

    Roseanne Barr

    Roseanne Conner

    Joe Minjares

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    Paul (hot tub buyer)

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    Ahmad Stoner

    Ahmad Stoner

    kid #1

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    Joe Keyes

    Joe Keyes

    customer #2

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    Danielle Harris

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    Molly Tilden

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    Johnny Galecki

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    Trivia, Notes, Quotes and Allusions

    FILTER BY TYPE

    • TRIVIA (2)

    • QUOTES (12)

      • Roseanne: Where do you think they get the ink for the comic books you draw? They gather up like twenty baby squid, that's where. Put 'em in a machine and torture 'em until the ink just squirts out.

      • (DJ has just written a report based solely on what Darlene has told him, and read the report to Roseanne.)
        Roseanne: I want you to find out about the real founding of our town. Go on down to the library. Go to the desk where we rent the videos, and ask them to help you find where the books are.
        DJ: Fine, but I'm lookin' up that sex stuff, too, so be ready!

      • Roseanne is confronting Darlene about the dead cow chalk outlines found outside The Lunch Box.
        Darlene: All right, let's get this over with. I did the chalk outlines. I just couldn't go on being part of the Conner family money-making death machine.
        Roseanne: Oh, now you come up with a name for the restaurant!

      • Dan: I don't know how people do this, sell stuff that nobody wants to people who can't afford it.
        Roseanne: It's the American dream, Dan.

      • Dan: I have a job interview, do we have a tie?
        Roseanne: Whoa whoa whoa, what?
        Dan: Ties, you know, those long thin things, remember the wedding?
        Roseanne: You mean you're going to get a job-job?

      • David: I'm vegetarian-like, I eat a lot of chicken.
        Darlene: I forgot chicken's a vegetable.
        David: I can't believe it, you argue even when I agree with you.
        Darlene: You're not agreeing with me, you're agreeing with her (Molly) who just happens to agree with me, which makes me reconsider my whole position.

      • (referring to Darlene's "making a statement" by drawing a dead cow outline in front of the restaurant)
        Roseanne: Yeah? Well I'm makin' a statement too, only my chalk outline's gonna have gonna have long curly hair and great big mouth!

      • Darlene: You can't make somebody go against their principles, I mean, what did you think when you saw me as a baby? "God, she's cute! I hope she never has the courage to stand up for her convictions"?
        Roseanne: OK, OK, so you have convictions. Just shut up about 'em!

      • (To Molly)
        Darlene: Your'e probably just saying that you are a vegetarian because you heard somewhere that Shannon Doherty might be one.

      • Customer: Hi, do you have any BBQ Pork?
        Darlene: Just because we slaughter cows, doesn't mean we hurt our little piggie friends!

      • (To DJ)
        Roseanne: Don't believe anything that Darlene tells you.
        Darlene: Except what I told you about the sex, that's all true.

      • Jackie: I better see how the play's going. Last year, no one clapped, and Tinkerbell died.

    • NOTES (0)

    • ALLUSIONS (2)

      • When Dan mentions that he "never has to see the boss.... It's just like Charlie's Angels," he alludes to a 1970s TV show about female secret agents. They reported to a boss named "Charlie" who was never seen on screen.

      • Darlene: Your'e probably just saying that you are a vegetarian because you heard somewhere that Shannon Doherty might be one.

        Shannon Doherty is an iconic actress who, during that time period, was best known as the character Brenda Walsh in the hit series Beverly Hills 90210.

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