Season 4 Episode 2

Take My Bike ... Please!

Aired Tuesday 9:00 PM Sep 24, 1991 on ABC



  • Trivia

  • Quotes

    • Becky: Well, I'm not doing the dishes. They can just sit in there and get all crusty and gross.
      Darlene: Fine, tomorrow night we're having leftovers!

    • Dan: I'm beat, let's just go to bed. (Dan and Roseanne turn out the lights and go to their room before Dan realizes they promised to read a story to DJ) Oh, my god! I can't believe we forgot about him again!
      Roseanne: Boy he better learn how to whine and complain like his sisters or he isn't going to make it in this family.

    • Roseanne: Man this family is falling apart Dan.
      Dan: Tough to stop a moving train honey.

    • D.J.: I haven't said anything in 2 days and nobody's noticed.
      Roseanne: That's not true.
      D.J.: Uh huh! The last thing I said was "Cheerios".

    • Roseanne: I just put Becky in charge, that's like putting Fredo in charge of the Corleone family.

    • Roseanne: So, how's everything going around here?
      Darlene: (referring to Becky) Well, Mr. Mom up there decided that I get to sit for DJ while she goes out with Mark, the cold sore king.

    • Becky: (to Roseanne and Dan) You will not believe what Darlene just made for dinner.
      (Darlene walks in)
      Darlene: Hey! DJ loves it!
      Becky: DJ eats hair!

    • Roseanne: (talking about the kids) How'd they get so spoiled when we've given them absolutely nothing?

    • Roseanne: Get to the part where I smoked the guy into buying the bike.
      Dan: No fair, you used Jackie as bait.
      Roseanne: Well, you smelled her, what would you have used her as?

    • Darlene: I object. (to leaving Becky in charge)
      Roseanne: (ignoring Darlene) And I expect that you'll listen to Becky just like you listen to me.
      Becky: (raising her hand)Now, I object.

  • Notes

  • Allusions

    • Roseanne: I just put Becky in charge. That's like putting Fredo in charge of the Corleone family.
      This is a reference to The Godfather movies, starring Marlon Brando, Al Pacino, and James Caan. The films revolved around mob boss Vito Corleone and his family, including Vito's middle child Fredo, who was considered the weakest of the Corleones.

    • The title of this episode is an allusion to comedian Henny Youngman's classic line, "Take My Wife...Please!"