Rowan & Martin's Laugh-In Season 3 Episode 12

Alan: There's just no privacy anywhere. I know the police are spying on me. How else would they know I'm a peeping Tom?

Jack: Personally, I've always preferred slowies.

Byron: Hey, Arte?
Arte: Yeah?
Byron: Do you like the new see-through dresses?
Arte: No. I never give them a tenth look.

Pamela: Mr. Benny, would you appear nude in a movie?
Jack: I wouldn't even appear nude in a bathtub.

Judy: Mr. Humperdinck, do you know the first eight bars of San Francisco?
Englebert: Let's see, it's Tiny's Tavern, Big Eddie's...
Judy: Oh, let's hear it folks, he's one of us!
Jack: That's the worst joke I've ever heard.
Zsa Zsa: If I become a cheerleader, I'll be Zsa Zsa Sis-boom-bah.
Jack: Correction, that's the worst joke I've ever heard.

Engelbert: All right, Goldie, how would you pronounce Engelbert Humperdinck backwards?
Goldie: It's already backwards.

Jill: Is a feathered quickie a quackie?

Jack: In my day, quickies were much quicker.
Peter: You can say that again.
Jack: In my day, quickies were much quicker.