The show begins with the script being labeled 'top secret' and Gary announcing that because of that, the show would not go on, but he recieved the script and got the go ahead. Mrs. Earbore then announced that she would drop out if she saw anything not tasteful; she then fell through the trap door. Then, standing on a staircase, Dan tells Dick that Raquel Welch would be the guest star and Dick says that she's crazy about him. Dan announces Raquel and she comes down the staircase past both of them. Afterwards, Gary did the intros with the cast dancing outside his booth. After an ad for denture paste, Martha Mitchell introduces Dan and Dick. Dan tells Dick he should be interested in current affairs and Dick says he could be a good President. Dan doesn't like Dick's ideas for the economy and unemployment. Edith Ann tells about eating her dog's dog food for him, then Gladys asks for Raquel's help with being glamourous; they sing the song 'How Can I Be a Little Bit More Like You, Miss Welch(Raquel)?' It turns out that Raquel becomes more like Gladys. After, the first short bits, and Officers Malloy and Reed from Adam-12 try to get started on a case, but Reed can't get his line delivered because he keeps laughing. Then Dick starts his mystery person contest, but his mystery person is rather obvious and he even says the person's name twice. Then more short bits, a bit where an alarm clock goes off and someone gets soaked with water, and the news, with the girls and Raquel as the dollies of the Laugh-In Follies. Dick returned to doing the present news and Dan the future news. Also featured was Big Al doing referee's signals, Moosie Drier with Kid News for Kids, a British view, and Raquel doing a new Army recruitment commercial. Following is the party, in a big new room with a new bar, a couple of platforms and a curved couch. Then, after more short bits, Dick presents the Pucci Pizza Papers, where Raquel plays a pizzeria owner in Washington D.C., where she delivered pizzas to the White House but didn't get paid for them because a Secret Service agent took the bill because it was a document relating to a top secret meeting. Then, after reading a Tarzan book, Gladys imagines she is Jane, but he thinks she looks like Cheetah. Next, more short bits, and Dick talks about a travel agency he co-owns and how he went around the country looking for new places of interest. However, it's all about things that have been seen before that Dick somehow doesn't know about. Then Ernestine calls Martha Mitchell and is thrilled when she hangs up on her, followed by the Swizzlers. Then more short bits, the Flying Fickle Finger of Fate Award, Buffalo Bob getting Sock-It-To-Me Time, and a bit about a beautiful girl in a homely world. Finally, the good nights, the joke wall, where all the jokes are about lions, and the last short bits.