Sabrina, the Teenage Witch

Salem: You're questioning your identity and since you're part mortal, instead of disappearing, part of your personality will fade. Sabrina: Which part? Salem: Apparently the rational part.

Harvey: My parents are making me babysit three afternoons a week and they're not even going out! Think that's fair? Sabrina: Only if they compensate you by extending the curfew of your choice. Harvey: Oh, that's brilliant! Where would I be without your cool rational thinking? Sabrina: Home by ten.

Salem: Maybe you wouldn't have such a hard time selling clocks if you had some of that monkey's charm... Hilda: Or maybe if you did... Salem: Like I'd ever do that... Like they even make little bell hop suits for cats... (Hilda dresses Salem in one magically) Oh that's right... You're a witch. I'll be back with your towels and ice...

Zelda: Time spent with mother is bittersweet. Hilda: Or like bitter-bitterer.

Hilda (after walking into the kitchen): What are these vermin infested animals doing here? Zelda: And more importantly, why aren't there newspapers down? Salem: I borrowed Coco and his little friends as a visual-aid, so listen and learn. Like you ladies, these animals do not live with their biological parents. They are all adopted, but they aren't whining and they aren't fading because they are loved. So are you... even if your mother is a crazy shrew. Zelda: You're absolutely right, Salem. Hilda: Don't call mother a shrew... She's a nut-case. Salem: And now, would you be so kind as to peer into yonder mirror. Hilda (to Zelda): Should we tell him that we're already back to normal? Zelda: Why spoil his moment?

Sabrina: Why didn't you identify monkey man? Zelda: We thought the fact that we're slowly disappearing into nothingness might give the officer pause. Sabrina: Okay, this is making me really emotional. (Sniff!) Must... stay... strong. I'm Sabrina, the girl with the disappearing aunts. Hilda: What's this? Sabrina: A reminder of who you are and how much your mother loved you. Now I have to get back to the Other Realm. Never surrender!

Salem: Dear God. Please patch up my family and make them as good... no make them better than they were before. One of the ways you might improve us; Wet food for the cat. If you see fit to answer this prayer, please send me a simple yet unmistakably clear sign. Let coins rain down on the kitchen table. (Waiting for God's answer, but nothing happens) Okay, plan 'B'!

Sabrina: Someone at the door! It could be death or someone really icky.