Sabrina, the Teenage Witch

Quizmaster: I'm not quizzing Ralph anymore. Sabrina: Why not? He was the perfect student. Quizmaster: I know, he was too perfect. I missed you and how you always loathed seeing me. I think maybe I got self-esteem issues. Sabrina: This is great! I mean, not your self-hatred.

Sabrina: I figured out why I need my quizmaster back! Judge: You know, you can't just barge in here assuming we have nothing to do. (Tumbleweed rolls through room) Proceed.

Hilda: I know you can do it, you're just not thinking! Sabrina: Of course I'm thinking! I'm talking, aren't I? Don't you have to think to be able to talk? Hilda: No, parrots talk. Sabrina: Oh, I'm a parrot, I'm as dumb as a bird, is that it? Hilda: That's not what I meant! And parrots aren't dumb. At the zoo they ride bicycles!

Hilda: To turn yourself into fire, you just have to think like fire! Sabrina: Well, that's helpful! I'm really enjoying vague university!

Hilda: I think I'm turning into wind... I feel a little breeze! Salem: That's just the life going out of us.

Sabrina: Congratulations! How does it feel to be the most brilliant person in the universe?! (Stalks away) Quizmaster: You'd think it'd pay more!

Sabrina: I'm so at peace with what's happened between me and the Quizmaster. I believe everything happens for a reason. Salem: That's why we call this stage denial...

Zelda: Hi honey, how was your tea? Sabrina: Oh, pretty average, you know. There was music, little sandwiches, tea, of course, oh and I got my Quizmaster fired! Salem: What kind of sandwiches?

Sabrina: Who's that? Quizmaster: That's the Head Quizmaster. I think her official title is "the person who can fire your butt"!

Quizmaster: Sabrina! There was a student who turned herself into fire while drinking a glass of water! That was incredible! Sabrina: Darn... It's amazing the things you miss when you're desperately trying to avoid you.

Sabrina: I can turn myself into water... Quizmaster: Anybody can do that. You see that waiter there? Those aren't cocktails, that's a tray full of students! Sabrina: Aww! I don't even wanna know what the crab cakes were...

Sabrina: I gotta get away from my quizmaster, or as I like to call him "if evil had a face!"

Hilda: I've got it! I remember how to turn myself into fire. Salem: If it involves dried branches and kerosene, it's not really magic.

Libby: Oh dear Lord, I just hugged a teacher. Sabrina: Great! Well, I can never touch aunt Zelda again.

Hilda: I just haven't turned myself into wind in years. Salem: Would cabbage help?