Sabrina, the Teenage Witch

Sabrina: So Martha convinced me that she was a dull, nice librarian but I still think that she was sincere when she laughed at my jokes. Zelda: Oh honey, everybody misjudges people. When Salem was busy trying to take over the world, your Aunt Hilda was convinced he was just a workaholic.

Martha: Oh, you didn't tell me there were going to be other people here. Sabrina: Oh, well, I thought the term 'public high school' implied that.

Hilda: Well I did it, I finally settled things with mother. Zelda: Oh Hilda, I'm so glad you talked to her. Hilda: Who talked? I filled her living room with two tonnes of cracked corn.

Martha: You know, you are so funny. When I read your letters sometimes I laugh so hard I make a sound.

Sabrina: Hey, Martha wants me to visit her. Would that be okay? Hilda: No! (They all look at her surprised.) I don't wanna be the only miserable person in the room.

Hilda My bedroom is now filled with four tons of cracked corn. I'm not allowed to watch tv for a week. Salem: Cracked corn? Isn't that one of the signs of the apocalypse? Run away!

Salem: Please... Zelda: No, You are not alligator wrestling in my living room! I don't care how many lives you have, I don't have time to pick up cat entrails off the carpet.

Martha: (Looking in Sabrina's mirror) Oh, it must be all that nervous grooming I did, that black cat kept trying to goad me into a knife fight.