Hilda Antoinette Spellman
Salem Saberhagen, the Cat (voice)
Sabrina J. Spellman
Phil the Dog
Sabrina mentions the title The Gift of Gab in this episode.
Roxie: Sabrina, what do you think you're doing?
Sabrina: Trying to be something I'm not. Most things come really easy to me, but this just isn't my thing.
Roxie: Granted, the surreal Japanese interlude may have been a mistake.
Caller #1: I want to talk about the proliferation of cell phones.
Roxie: Man, are they annoying.
Sabrina Not to me. There's nothing I like more than gabbin on the horn. Speaking of horns, whatever happened to Kenny G? What does that 'G' stand for? I know it doesn't stand for general audiences, and what is a general audience anyway? Eisenhower? Schwarzkopf? Patton? Next topic!
Roxie: Mental health, specifically yours?
Roxie: Somebody's in a better mood.
Sabrina: Hey, smile and the whole world smiles with you, cry, and you cry alone. Everybody loves somebody sometime.
Roxie: Had a couple of double espressos?
Phil the Dog: Don't leave me with these losers! One's, dumb as dirt, the others got the personality of a limp noodle.
Zelda: How dare you talk about us... You talked! He does talk!
Hilda: Salem was right! He was just using us!
Salem: Giving credence to the old adage: Stick with the user you know.
Sabrina: Let me guess, Even Steven?
Even Steven: Well, originally Stefan, but Efen Stefan gave people the wrong idea.
Sabrina: Well on the first show I was trying to be spontaneous and Miles thought it'd be a better idea if I prepared. Now you're saying don't prepare, be spontaneous. Well I'm not listening to either one of you!
Roxie: If you're not going to prepare and you're not going to be spontaneous, what does that leave?
Sabrina: Wouldn't you like to know? (Closes the door.) Wouldn't I like to know!
Roxie: Sabrina, this is the way talk shows go. Tonight people just weren't interested in your topics.
Sabrina: Well they didn't even give me time to look up stuff in my big book!
Sabrina: I have prepared some interesting and very neatly arranged topics for tonight and I'm only slightly nauseous.
Roxie: Thanks for the heads up.
Sabrina: Miles, I know you liked the show, but tell me the truth. Did I make a fool of myself?
Miles: No good could come of my answer.
Miles: Great show tonight.
Roxie: Thanks! (To Sabrina.) I told you we were awesome. We're even scoring with the 'men who love cardboard' crowd.
Salem: All right, cards on the table. Why are you here?
Phil the Dog: Why do you think? To sponge off those two daffy broads.
Salem: That's my racket!
Salem: I'm telling you, that dog is evil incarnate!
Zelda: Oh Salem, you've said that about the gardener, the mailman...and us.
Sabrina: Oh man, talking on the radio is a lot harder than I thought.
Roxie: I told you.
Sabrina: Oh we'll be fine. I mean, all we have to do is to chill with the trads and then we'll be free styling...I downloaded some jargon off the internet.
(While doing yoga.)
Zelda: Hilda, stop whimpering.
Hilda: I didn't know I was.
Roxie: Spellman, how do I look for our first show?
Sabrina: Amazing. I mean, you look great in that top.
Miles: Em, point of order! You're doing a radio show. You could go to work wearing my clothes.
Roxie: I don't know about this whole radio thing. We wrote up the proposal for that at the end of last year. I don't even remember what we proposed.
Sabrina: Well to quote you, (Reading.) 'A ground breaking mix of heady talk, music and politics that breaks the mould and shakes up the student booty.' Oh, that's supposed to be 'body'. I hope that's not why we got the job.
Roxie: Don't ask.
Sabrina: Don't tell.
Salem: I wonder what we should call you?
Phil the dog: Your worst nightmare!
Phil the Dog also appeared in the Season 5 episode "Witchright Hall." But in this episode, all of that is forgotten. This might be because the only people to see Phil in "Witchright Hall" were Sabrina and Amanda and neither one of them saw him this time to warn Hilda and Zelda.
Josh, Morgan, and Harvey do not appear in this episode.
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