Saturday Night Live

Season 29 Episode 3

Halle Berry/Britney Spears

Aired Saturday 11:30 PM Oct 18, 2003 on NBC
out of 10
User Rating
20 votes

By Users

Episode Summary

Halle Berry/Britney Spears
Live from New York, it's... Maya Rudolph! Sketches include, "Kobe & Vanessa Bryant," "Gaystrogen," "The Don Zimmer Sports Spectacular," "Donatella Versace," "Tel-e-link," "Quick Ones," "Sukihura Sushi Bar," "The Sunday National Enquirer," "The Best Of Klymaxx," "Brokaw Voicemail," "Ashford & Simpson," and "Speedreader." Britney Spears performs "Me Against The Music" and "Everytime."moreless

Who was the Episode MVP ?

  • Kiss, Dammit, Kiss!

    A Review by "HelloStuart," Amateur Critic and Girl Gone Wild

    There have been three things that I have noticed so far this season:

    1) "All That" vet Kenan Thompson has been a washout in almost every sketch he's been in.

    2) After merely three episodes, Finesse Mitchell might be on his way to becoming the show's go-to guy.

    3) The writing and actor chemistry is just as inconsistent as it was last year.

    I may as well make it short and sweet, as I find it increasingly difficult to say something original about each and every sketch that has aired thus far this season. I still love the show, but I'm not muffling by Year 20 comparisons just yet. The way things are going, I may as well campaign to get rid of two-thirds of the current cast, a la 1994-95. Think about it: Darrell Hammond's been on too long, the comedy team of Fallon and Sanz has become smug and self-absorbed, "Weekend Update" should become a solo vehicle for the underrated Tina Fey, and the only actors that seem to give a damn are limited to one or two sketches an episode.

    For round three of Year 29, acclaimed actress Halle Berry slips into the shoes of hosting, while pop star Britney Spears provides the music. There has been word that the two might lock lips in tonight's episode, since everybody is still talking about the kisses they received earlier this year from Adrian Brody and Madonna, respectively. Remember, people: Madge kissed Christina Aguilera too.

    And now, some hot, exciting sketch-by-sketch analysis:

    COLD OPENING: It appears that since his rape trial, Vanessa Bryant (Maya) has had hubby Kobe (Finesse) by the balls. More tiring than funny.

    MONOLOGUE: Lorne tries to conjure Halle and Britney into kissing, but they merely flirt with the idea. Gee, what a surprise development this is.

    "Gaystrogen": An ad spoof in which a gay couple saves their relationship by giving the one partner (Fred) some masculinity-curtailing pills. At least there was one gay kiss tonight.

    "The Don Zimmer Sports Spectacular": A spoof of the previous week's Zimmer-Martinez incident at the ALCS. Pete Rose (Jeff), Bob Costas (Darrell), and the Red Sox' ballgirl (HB) all take on a flustered Zimmy (Horatio) by grabbing him by the head and push him into the ground whenever he gets riled up. Every time he stands back up, he apologizes like if he was imitating a whiny Curly Joe Besser. This sketch was just plain sad.

    "Versace Halloween": Maya Rudolph is so sublime as the bitchy fashion heir, and her latest performance as the acerbic diva carries this sketch. Jokes about candy (and) cigarettes, Naomi Campbell's anger issues, and Elton John's goofiness take a backseat to Maya's superb performance.

    "Tel-E-Link": Another mock commercial, this time with contented phone-line customers speaking techno-babble. Somewhat jocular.

    "Quick Ones": Another package of three sketches at a time (see last week's review) ends with a trio of corporate drones (HB, Amy, Will) taking pills to half-heartedly simulate orgasms. This sketch brings further proof that Will Forte is SNL's secret weapon.

    "Sukihara Sushi Bar": Halle slips into an old role that fit her like a glove, the BAP, in this sketch about three obnoxious ghetto girls who chat endlessly in a "Benihana"-type bar. Finesse Mitchell (as the head friend) continues to impress me with his versatility.

    "The Sunday National Enquirer": Halle joins in making fun of the tabloid that has harassed her for years. It's not a scathing criticism of the scandal sheet, though it was enjoyable to watch.

    MUSICAL PERFORMANCE: The girl that put "Me Against the Music" Does anybody remember back when Britney was virginal, flat-chested, and worth listening to? While I never into that bubble-gum crap that was on the radio three or four years ago, I still long for the good ol' days.

    WEEKEND UPDATE: After two straight above-average editions of "WU," Fallon & Fey crash back to Earth with another lacking performance. If there was one great joke, it was probably the one about the Monopoly championships. Meanwhile, Jimmy introduces a Native American comedian (Fred) that I felt was bordering on offensive stereotypes, and Cubs "Superfan" Bart Swerski (Horatio) comments on his hometown team choking on the NLCS earlier this week. Suddenly, Bart's uncle Bob swoops in and starts talking about the movie "Chicago" for no apparent reason. And worst of all, Jimmy and Horatio started chuckling in the middle of the skit. Did George Wendt really have to soil the legacy of the beloved "Bill Swerski's Superfans" just for a timely albeit half-hearted cameo? I may not be a Cubs fan (Go Kansas City Royals!), but as a fellow Chicagoan, I feel strangely empty.

    "Klymaxx Infomercial": Joey Lawrence (Seth) tries to plug the 80's CD compilation "The Best Of Klymaxx." I thought this was one big joke, but I just found out via Google that there actually was a long-forgotten faux-funk "band" by this name. Believe me when I say that this Klymaxx had precious and few laughs.

    "Brokaw & Voicemail": The personal assistant (HB) to the NBC newsreader (Chris) persuades him into recording her answering machine message, then bullies him into perfecting it. Like "Quick Ones" earlier tonight, what starts off great results in an unsatisfying acme.

    MUSICAL PERFORMANCE: For her second go-around, the pop singer croons "Every Time" from her upcoming fourth album. Further proof that you can't spell "Britney Spears" without "BS."

    "Ashford & Simpson's Biggest Fan": Husband (Finesse) surprises wife (HB) with performance by the 70's-era pop duo, and she goes berserk. Guess what, everybody! Kenan Thompson (as Nick Ashford) actually has something worth saying!

    "Speedreader": Some dork in a bar (Will) attempts to seduce a female patron (HB) and wins her over, then dumps her by simulating intercourse in a millisecond. Twice.

    So, in conclusion, this episode sucked. I was underwhelmed not only by the Oscar-winner's unusually dazed performance, but also by the fuddy-duddy writing and unbearably overproduced numbers presented by third-time musical guest Spears. Next week we get a little breather, as SNL presents the clip show "The Best of Tracy Morgan," probably because the annual Halloween Special has been run into the ground after just four airings. And the week after that, we have host Kelly Ripa and musical guests OutKast, whom I believe are a thousand times more funky than Klymaxx.

    Sketches That Will Probably Be Removed for the 60-Minute Edit: Oh, there are so many choices. I say, get rid of everything except the monologue, "Versace" and the four fake ads.

    Feel free to send questions and/or comments to "HelloStuart" at He responds to all queries.moreless
  • Not funny - Not interesting...

    The show is supposed to be a comedy. Most of the sketches were bad. The only sketches I liked, was the cute "Quick Ones" about an oragasmic pill. I also liked the "Britney and Halle gonna Kiss" sketch, with Jimmy Falon's reactions.

    I would suggest to get the sketches from the internet without watching the entire episode.
Halle Berry

Halle Berry


Guest Star

Zachary Woodlee

Zachary Woodlee

Model in Donatella Versace skit

Guest Star

Britney Spears

Britney Spears


Recurring Role

Lorne Michaels

Lorne Michaels


Recurring Role

George Wendt

George Wendt

Bob Swerski

Recurring Role

Featured Episode Clip

Trivia, Notes, Quotes and Allusions


  • TRIVIA (0)

  • QUOTES (8)

    • Tina Fey: Four members of Alpha Lambda Tau are seeking to make theirs the first gay fraternity at the University of Texas, San Antonio. It's just like every other fraternity, except with slightly more gay sex.

    • Tina Fey: This Thursday, 48 contestants will compete in the 2003 National Monopoly Championship, which will be held onboard a moving train. They couldn't hold it at last year's venue, because, uh... Steve's mom is putting new carpet in the basement.

    • Tina Fey: One of the newest trends among celebrities is to wear a simple red knotted string, which symbolizes a dedication to the Kabbalah. For those of you who don't know, Kabbalah is an ancient form of publicity invented by Madonna.

    • Tina Fey: Police in Brooklyn were called after a 4-year-old boy showed up at kindergarten with a bag of marijuana in his shoe. The drugs had a reported street value of five milks and a cupcake.

    • Tina Fey: This week, the city of Atlantic City unveiled its new slogan: "Atlantic City: Always Turned On." It sure beats their old slogan: "Atlantic City: Las Vegas for Ugly People."

    • Jimmy Fallon: Former Royal Navy Lieutenant Commander Patrick Dalzel-Job, the British war hero who was the inspiration for the character in James Bond, died this week at the age of 90. His family was shaken, not stirred.

    • Tina Fey: On Thursday, in California, President Bush met privately with Governor-Elect Arnold Scwarzenegger. What did the pair talk about? Neither is really sure.

    • Tina Fey: According to a new study, people on a low-carb diet, like Atkins, eat more than people on a standard diet but also lose more weight. This is thanks to the extra calories they lose during their non-stop yammering about how they're on Atkins.

  • NOTES (5)

    • Sketches/segments not shown in the 60-minute edit: "Gaystrogen", "Tele-Link," "Starkisha at the Japanese Steakhouse," Britney Spears's second performance, "The Best of Klymaxx," "The Sunday National Enquirer," and "Tom Brokaw's Voice Mail."

    • This episode includes a rare instance in which the musical guest participates in the opening monologue.

    • The NBC rerun features dress rehearsal versions of the following: Halle Berry's Monologue, Weekend Update, and "Tom Brokaw Voice Mail." "Gaystrogen" and "Tele-Link" were cut, and the National Enquirer ad spoof includes a segment with Will Forte and Rachel Dratch.

    • The original broadcast was watched by the highest amount of viewers since the season finale in May 2003. This ended up being the second most-watched episode of the season.

    • This is George Wendt's first appearance on SNL since Year 23.