Saturday Night Live

Season 32 Episode 7

Matthew Fox/Tenacious D

Aired Saturday 11:30 PM Dec 02, 2006 on NBC

Episode Fan Reviews (11)

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  • “The only N-word I would call you... is nice”

    A Review by “HelloStuart,” the Castaway Amateur Critic

    This week’s host is Matthew Fox, the veteran television actor currently starring in the hit ABC series “Lost.” Though it’s nice to see that the enigmatic ABC hit is finally being represented on SNL, it’s actually taking a backseat to the musical guest: Tenacious D. Yes, Jack Black and Kyle Gass have brought their kick-ass blend of folk and death metal back to the Studio 8H stage. As far as I know, this is the second time ever in SNL history that a comedy act has been selected as musical guest (the first, of course, being Ashlee Simpson).

    And now, the sketch-by-sketch analysis:

    COLD OPENING: In an NBC Special Report, Iraqi Prime Minister Nouri al-Maliki (FA) and his translator (WF) go into great, almost excruciating detail over soldiers with missing limbs in front of an uncomfortable Dubya (JS). If Fred’s pseudo-Arabic gibberish was intended to be wacky, it certainly didn’t make the sketch any funnier.

    MONOLOGUE: Dr. Jack admits that he’s wanted to host for nearly a decade now, but he’s relieved that he finally earned his shot. Even when Michael Richards (BH) dropped by to show of his “new material,” this wasn’t really going anywhere.

    “Sale-Mart”: The employees of a presumably evil big-box store don’t benefit from low prices in several ungainly ways. This is a good commentary on the slow death of the valued employee, but couldn’t they have done this sooner, since every other TV show that’s latently critical towards society (“The Simpsons,” “Family Guy,” “South Park”) has already ventured into this territory? Someone was clearly sleeping at the wheel here…

    “Nancy Grace”: Tonight, Her Graceless (AP) unwittingly race-baits college professor Dr. Albert Edwards (KT) on the Michael Richards commentary, reacts to the aborted OJ Simpson press junket, then grills Officer Greg Tanner (Fox) over a parking ticket. Though you can tell Amy has a lot of fun impersonating Grace, and her impression in return is spot-on right down to the exaggerated Southern accent, you can’t help but wish she was given something funny to say.

    “Deep House Dish”: So DJ Dynasty Handbag dumped Tiara Z and replaced her with the not-quite-as-dense T’Shane (AS), it’s still the same Dish. One rising star of the House music world (MR) struts her glass eye, while another (AP) leaps out of her 43rd-story apartment for the shear thrill of it. I really don’t know what to make of all of this, but would it be safe to say that this recurring sketch has officially run its course?

    “‘Lost’ Fans”: A hodgepodge of Matthew’s fans grill him on a lengthy elevator ride in some attempt to dehumanize people that get too caught up in their favorite TV shows; outside of Fred’s Jersey boy and Maya’s emotionally unstable office drone, the characters in this sketch weren’t terribly fleshed out.

    MUSICAL PERFORMANCE: JB and KG go back and forth on lead vocals for “Kickapoo,” the song that leads off the “Pick of Destiny” soundtrack.

    WEEKEND UPDATE: In what has to be single stupidest Update commentary I’ve seen since I’ve been watching the show, “Kramer” has become the new N-word, or so Jesse Jackson (DH) and Reverend Al Sharpton (KT) declare. Granted, both activists have become self-caricatures, but I’m not going to dwell on that, nor that does that have anything to do with the weakest crop of Update editorials so far this season. Amy’s Aunt Linda (KW) comes back to review movies in what is essentially a carbon copy of her first appearance last month, while Whitney Houston’s (MR) lamenting her mansion was essentially three minutes of rambling alleviated only by a one-sided phone conversation with her ex-husband. If there was one highlight, though, it was Amy’s longwinded editorial on Britney Spears’ inability to wear panties; the euphemisms ran rampant, but it was almost akin to a stand-up comedy riff.

    “Crazy Mountain Man”: A sketch about two sisters (AP, KW) and their puppy love for a pie-obsessed Blue Ridge hermit (Fox) turns into a fourth-wall smorgasbord, complete with Maya pretending to be Lorne and a pointless romp to the tune of “Yakkity Sax.” This was insane, sloppy, yet… strangely likable.

    “History vs. Math Buffs”: Two history-loving marrieds (WF, KW) are shocked and appalled when their prodigal college-age son (AS) switches his major to mathematics, which results in a random appearance by a math history professor (Fox) and some deliriously hammy, Movie-of-the-Week acting by Forte, who happened to be the solitary saving grace of this undercooked vignette.

    “The Mayan Empire”: With bloodthirsty European explorers ready to crush their isolated existence, what does their beloved emperor (FA) want to focus on? Why, a heavenly invention called chocolate! Yeah, it’s a lazy theory (as the announcer, played by DH, admits), whoever wrote this has a love for life’s most minuscule foibles and it shows.

    MUSICAL PERFORMANCE: Several cast members recreate past musical trends that all failed to usurp “The Metal.”

    Right now, it seems that the show and all its life forms are aware of its strengths but keep obsessing over its weaknesses. It was interesting to see Matthew Fox immerse himself into his roles (something that hasn’t been of late), but an A for effort couldn’t salvage a really weak broadcast. It’s safe to assume that Bill Hader is a decent character actor, but can’t carry a sketch for his dear life, and as much as I like Jason Sudeikis, he keeps getting more bland and flavorless as time passes on. Andy Samberg was in nearly every sketch this evening, and though he may not be my first choice for a clutch hitter, at least he’s in better shape than when I all but dismissed him at this point last season. This season, however, is roughly one-third over and already it’s one of the most enigmatic periods in SNL history that I’ve had to sit through.

    Sketches/Segments That Will Probably Be Removed in Repeats: Weekend Update and everything after the “Crazy Mountain Man” sketch.

    Next Week: Two-time Academy Award nominee Annette Bening hosts, while musical guest Gwen Stefani makes her fourth scheduled appearance on the show with some assistance from Nigerian-born R&B crooner Akon.

    Feel free to contact “HelloStuart” at
  • A bit of a letdown from Fox.

    Bush Opening - These openings are just tired. Back when Ferrell used to do Bush, I'd perk up every time I'd see that seal knowing that something good was going to follow. Now I just groan and wait for the pain to begin. And different situations would be a great way to improve the Bush skits. How about a presidential dinner party?

    Monologue - Fox is no comedian so it was wise to keep it short. Great impression of Kramer by Hader.

    Sale*Mart - I thought it was the best sketch of the night. And it was taped! I thought this sketch was right on the mark. Too many people get so indignant over human rights abuses but continue to support one of the largest abusers of all.

    Nancy Grace - I don't think this could have been made funny with any change in the premise. These types of cable show parodies often fall flat and this is no exception.

    Deep House Dish - Deep House Dish should have been retired after the first episode. Why is this supposed to be funny? Certainly the host and co-host were never funny. I guess the point is we get to see vaguely funny techno acts in crazy costumes. OK, that might be funnier if techno was actually relevant in the U.S. How about a twisted take on CMT? Now that could be funny!

    Lost in an Elevator - I liked it, but mostly because I am a fan of Lost. Other than the Lost jokes, the only thing that remains is a celebrity trapped in an elevator with obnoxious fans. Carvey and Nealon used to do those bits where they would sing theme songs from shows and movies that the star was in. Now that was funny.

    Weekend update - The jokes in Weekend Update are getting better. I don't thing we need anymore editorials from Rev. Jackson and Rev. Sharpton. Nor anymore Whitney Houston impressions.

    Mountain Man - I was pretty bored with the "Matthew Fox is irresistible to women" premise by this time. It's obvious that Fox does not have any comedy chops. But that's OK. There are tons of straight roles he could do. That's what Alec does nearly every time. Maya's Lorne was funny. That's about it.

    Not a History Buff - Original, but not executed or developed very well. They missed the whole gay son" thing. There should have been more of a "coming out" feel to it.

    Mayan Hot Chocolate - I thought this was going to be great when I saw the set and costumes. "Alright, a highly thought out period piece" I thought to myself. Not to be though. The discovery of hot chocolate could have been funnier if done by females. Females generally have a stronger love for chocolate, right? As is, this sketch went nowhere and was highly disappointing.
  • Who wants an underforest that is bigger than a New York Pizza!

    [NOTE: I will cease using numbers and rounding them out, sicne it was annoying to add them up, so I will just rounf out what I felt the show deserved in my head]

    [NEW NOTE: I will keep numbering the skits, but I will round them out to what I feel it deserved instead]

    This one was just all over the place. We got a host from a show that I don't remotley care about, but in hand we got a kick ass metal band :). The Skits seemed like they were quickly written and only a few stood out for me in this mediocore episode. Looks like we are back in Season 30 teritiory. The newbies are doing okay, but Hader is looking stiff and not good enough to carry a skit, Samberg is doing better, Sudekis is a little bland, but Wigg is doing the best in my mind. But the only cast member that stands out for me is Amy Poehler.

    COLD OPENING: In this skit we see Nouri al-Maliki and his Translator go into overt detail about excesive car and camel bombings, and we see that Hader has kept the Dubya impression and Forte aint gona do it anymore. It was a one joke premise and I was just annoyed after a while. 4

    MONOLOGUE: Fox admits he wants to host and Hader pops out as Kramer as a high point of a wastefull monologe, and it was so short it felt like the writers just gave up.


    “Sale-Mart”: Havent we seen this crap before on "The Simpsons" and "South Park"? It was just a satire of how crappy the big box mart stores are to their employees, I have already seen this on Jib-Jab, buh bye.


    “Nancy Grace”: Nancy Grace had a funny voice but nothing funny to say. We also got more on the O.J. and Kramer stuff, heard it. Amy had fun doing the voice but thta wasnt enough for me.


    “Deep House Dish”: As you all know, I hate MTV, and I hate people like these uber dorks in this show. It was just to painful to watch for me. This has ran its course, kill it.


    “‘Lost’ Fans”: We just hear conspiracy theroms about "Lost", heard it all before and I don't care, it was entertaining to see how obsessed these losers are though [though you could say the same about me and "Perfect Dark"].


    WEEKEND UPDATE: This was so stupid, yet I was cracking a grin. I was annoyed by the stuff between Jesse "Himey Town" Jackson and Al "**** it I'm not electing you" Jackson discussing how Kramer is the new N word. Then it went downhill with Witney Houston and Aunt Linda giving me a hemorage, but I must say I did enjoy Amys little beav editiorial.


    “Crazy Mountain Man”: There wasnt much to this skit except breaking the 4th wall, it did remind me of "Operation Bear Shark" and that water jug thing from the Dane Cook episode though. I got annoyed after a while though.


    “History vs. Math Buffs”: Forte saved this one with his acting, it was just a stupid ass skit about a rivaly between to geek major lords. I didnt really give a hoot.


    “The Mayan Empire”: What a lazy theroy about the death of the Mayans, CHOCOLATE! Whoever wrote this one has a love for this kinda stuff, it was mediocore at best though.


    Overall, SNL is falling back down after a few heavy punches.
  • A standard SNL, which is a major improvement this season

    Lots of funny stuff here. The opener was stupid(again)and the new guy doing the Bush Impression is very weak, they should let Will do it again. Matthew Fox did a good job hosting, his monologue was a normal disaster(like most)but he did well in all the skits. Sale Mart commercial was funny and a very realistic portrayal of Walmart. The Nancy Grace bit is funny, Amy does a good impersonation but you can tell she cracks herself up when she overdoes it. Deep House Dish is and was a disaster, I really wish they'd stop doing that stupid bit. Deep House Dish is overplayed as much as they did game show parodies in the 90's. The Lost Fans thing was the best bit of the night. I said after watching one show of Lost that they were in Purgatory and glad to see others think the same. Weekend Update was good even though Seth ruins the comedy with his smarmy delivery. Remove Seth and bring back ANYONE, I hear Colin Quinn is available! That's how bad Seth is!
    The rest of the show was filler with not much comedy worth mentioning. I love Tenacious D but am not loving the new stuff, still they are better than most musical guests. 2nd best show of the year and a major improvement over the first 4 which were total disasters.
  • It's not Purgatory, unless Purgatory is a beautiful island with good looking people and Others and a smoke monster.

    Here we see an episode I was looking forward to. The main character from one of my favorite shows was the host. I didn’t care about the musical guest, but I was glad to see the host. I was hoping for a parody of this show, but many agreed that that may not happen. Well, I can’t say any more like that, so I’ll start my review.

    This week’s host is Dr. Jack Shepard from LOST, aka, Matthew Fox. I was looking forward to seeing a LOST cast member host the show, though I pry would have preferred Dom Monaghan. But I was glad to see someone from the show on. Matthew, who plays a serious role on LOST, did quite well I thought. He didn’t mess up his lines at all, and seemed prepared for the show. His monologue was short. He explained that after Party Of Five ended, his life went downhill. He started drinking and stabbed a few people. Now he is doing well though. He has quite a high salary and won an Emmy. It was a pretty good monologue, and Foxy was a pretty good host. A-

    This week’s musical guest is Tenacious D. I’m not a fan, though did like the song “Tribute.” They performed “Kickapoo” and “Metal.” Their performance of “Metal” included the SNL cast. I do have a complaint to make. Okay, for the punk people, those outfits didn’t even seem punk. The punk guy had on what appeared to be a kilt. I know punk guys, and they don’t dress like that. They weren’t too entertaining to me, though I was bored either. I was glad when the performances ended though. C+


    Cold Opening: Bush and al-Maliki – All I can say is that in al-Maliki’s country, they have car bombs like crazy. Plus, horse bombs, camel bombs, and mouse bombs. This skit was pretty funny, since all it was was al-Maliki discussing those car bombs. A-

    Sale-mart – Take off of Wal*Mart. Here is a store that denies their employees benefits and health care and good pay and forces them to work harder to save you money. Funny skit. True too. A-

    Nancy Grace – Nancy freaks out about the littlest things, doesn’t she? I loved the part in here where Nancy said to Kenan’s character, after discussing the Michael Richards’ incident, “The only N word I would call you is nice.” This skit was pretty funny. I don’t watch the show, but if Nancy, the real one, is close to this, I could catch an ep I suppose. B+

    Deep House Dish – Andy is now the new co-host of this show. Yay! His hair though was very dinosaur like. His character was funny, and did seem familiar to me. I always love Kenan’s character, who gets so annoyed by his co-host. The best part of this skit was seeing dr. Jack Shepard in the role of a DJ. I loved how he kept saying it was about to get started, and then he dropped the mic. And Amy’s character’s song, about wanting cologne for Xmas sounded like it’d be in a Target commercial. This was a funny skit. I hope Andy stays as co-host too. A-

    LOST Fans – OMFG! This was by far the best skit of the night! Matthew Fox is on an elevator with all these LOST viewers. I wonder if he did any writing on this himself, considering this is how the fans are. I should know, I’m one of em. My favorite part was when Andy’s character got on the elevator, looked at Matthew, and went, “Purgatory.” And Kenan complaining about the lack of black characters and complaining about Eko’s death was funny. Fred’s character was like a few on the LOST forums here, saying how we learn nothing, but more builds up. And of course, there were the women who loved him. Amy and Maya, who freaked out if anything was revealed, flirted with him and kind of threw themselves at him. If it were Sawyer, they might have jumped him. This skit was hilarious! It was funny and true. Love it! A++

    Crazy Mountain Man – Here is a funny idea. I had my suspicions about this skit from the start. I know that the ladies of SNL always have that one male host they want, as Amy said about Jude Law for the 04/05 season, but this really played it. The skit started with Matthew playing a Mountain Man in need of pie, then asked for a kiss. It turns out that this skit was only a ploy for the women to get to make out with Matthew. If there is a reason to get on the show, this is it. For Andy I mean. I wonder what they would have done if it was Josh Holloway? B+

    Math vs. History Buffs – Andy! (In tight jeans too.) Man, I thought some of the guys in the theatre department were attractive, but if they look like Andy in math, I gotta hang out there more. This skit is about a math whiz in a family of history buffs. Andy changes his major to math, and his parents mostly disown him. But the day is saved after a mysterious scholarly gentleman enters the house and gives them advice. I love the part where the math history professor disappears, and Andy goes, “Who was that strange man?” and the father, Will, goes, “I don’t know. But he stole our television.” Pretty funny skit. I give it a bit of a + for Andy. A+

    The Mayan Empire – The mystery might have been solved! The Mayan Empire disappeared after too much of a love of chocolate. My favorite part was when Bill came in, dying, and as he was dying, gave a recipe for making brownies. During a battle, a crucial battle, they focused on chocolate. I was glad Andy was in it too. Funny idea. A-

    Andy was in five out of the 8 skits. Doesn’t get any better than that.

    I’m not a Tenacious D fan, so maybe the music.

    Andy was in more than half the skits. That never happens. But, what also surprised me was that Matthew was very good in the comedic roles, and that Deep House Dish character.

    SKIT AVERAGE – 3.9/4 A

    SHOW RATING: 8.9/10 Sparkling Diamonds (If the music were better, it’d have a higher grade)

    Next week is Annette Bening and Gwen Stefani and Akon. Gwen has one song out, Akon has like 50, but with guests. So, will they be performing together by any chance? I know he produced her album. We’ll see. I like Gwen, so I’ll be glad to see her performance.
  • I missed Kickapoo!!!

    Where the hell was Kickapoo?!?!? I\'m like the biggest D fan ever, and I missed Kickapoo, which is my favorite song!!! Where can I find it?!?!? I need a site to watch that video!!! df df sdf sf sdf df d df sf d ds dsf sds dsf ds ds dsf df ds df df sd dfs df df sds fds fsd dsf df d fs ds dsf fd fd ds ds fd dsg g fdg fdh fdh dh dgf gfd g fdf s ds fds gs dgs dsfg fg fdh h ds gds ds dsg sdf fds gfd
  • Seriously, what was that?

    Hey look, it’s Charlie from “Party of Five” ! Obviously, I didn’t recognize him without the beard. Perhaps it was a sense of bad timing with SNL being off last week, but the Michael Richards thing is old news. On to the sketches, I don’t know who Nancy Grace of CNN is, but she must have the most annoying voice in the world. Another awful “Deep House Dish” with a bunch of modern … whatever you call that… that made me and most likely just as old & older SNL fans feel like we were completely out of touch. And then there was the “Lost” sketch where Fox plays himself and meets eager Lost fans in an elevator. I don’t watch Lost, so the jokes flew completely over my head. Go home, Mountain Man. This was a dumb sketch. Math vs. History Buffs, and there you have another 1-joke sketch. The History Channel / Mayans sketch with something about discovering chocolate. Another boring 1-joke sketch. The D performed & was one of the few music guests I actually watch, and the D is always the D, tho they seem to be a bit antiquated. About the only thing that impressed me was Hader’s Cosmo Kramer, tho it took him about halfway through to really get the voice going.
  • Matthew Fox with musical guest Tenacious D

    Matthew Fox looks great with a shower and shave. It was a nice change to see him all cleaned up. Though I am a fan of Lost. Jon Heder does great impersonations but his Kramer during the monologue is not my favorite.

    I don\'t care for Jason Sudeikis as president Bush. I much prefer Will Forte as \"W\". So thumbs down to the the first press conference sketch. However I had a couple laugh out loud moments. Matthew Fox enters an elevator which then fills up with fans of LOST. Maya and Amy are hysterical as gushing female fans of the show. They merit my first LOL of the episode. Maya\'s character isn\'t up to date on LOST because she is watching on DVD. Those TV obsessed like me have been there!!! And poor Matt is trapped listening to kooky theories and flirting flans. It\'s funny because you know this stuff really happens to him.

    I think Seth Meyers has great delivery on Weekend Update. He looks like a TV Anchorman. I know people miss Tina Fey but I think Seth is coming along. And Kristin Wiigs\' impersonations are great too. She really gives Aunt Linda 110%.

    I\'m not a big fan of Tenacious D. But their performance was definitely energetic. The Mountain Man sketch was cute. And an appearance by Maya disguised as Lorne Michaels was my second out loud laugh of the evening. Overall an average episode with a couple good laughs.
  • An ok episode

    Saturday Night Live, Matt Fox is hosting this episode with tenations D.
    Didnt see the movie though. In the begining he sort of complains why during his party of five days he wasnt asked to hosts. Then "Kramer" comes on saying they should host the show together.
    Throught out this episode it the female cast members wanted to date Matt. This can be said in the Elavtor sketch. And to me they kept going on and on about Lost. I know he is on it and it is a very big huge show. Weekend up date was funnier than i thought it would be. But still I dont like Seth there.
  • This episode sucked ass.

    Tonights SNL was, how can I say it? It sucked. It was a bad show all together. We had a bad host and musical guest. I didn\'t laugh once during this entire episode. The only time I laughed was when Bill Hader came out dress as Michael Richards. After that nothing. Tenacious D sucked too. I was hoping they would play \"The Pick of Destiny\" and \"Tribute\" but no they didn\'t. All they did was perform two songs that sucked. I don\'t think thing are going to get any better with the musical guests for the next two weeks. Gwen Stefani is the musical guest next week and If you havent heard her latest single \"Wind It Up\" its quite possibly the worst song I\'ve ever heard. Do me a favor people change the channel when she performs. I hate to say it but I think she\'s worst than Ashlee Simpson.
  • Hey, there's Kramer!

    Matthew Fox hosts <i>Saturday Night Live</i> with musical guest Tenacious D (Jack Black and Kyle Gass).

    Cold Open - NBC Special Report: Joint Press Conference in Amman, Jordan, with President Bush (Jason Sudeikis) and Iraqi Prime Minister Nouri al-Maliki (Fred Armisen) with translator Will Forte. Bill Hader asks the first question dealing with the PM's absence. He gives a funny answer, citing threats on his life, internet service, etc. Maya Rudolph asks a qieston for the PM, which Bush says the PM can answer. The next question was asked by Andy Samberg, I think. Kristen Wiig asks if our security forces have given them anything necessary for security. Flash lights, telephones, borrowing a car with a bomb, artificial limbs, etc. Kenan Thompson asks to name the most significant achievement of the Iraqi Forces. The answer would be the Iraqi National Security Forces picnic in which it was a beautiful summer day with only two car bombings. Live from New York, it's Fred Armisen and Will Forte!

    Monologue - Matthew Fox says it is quite an honor. He came close to hosting in 1996 when he was on <i>Party of 5</i>, before he was on <i>LOST</i>. Names Neve Campbell, Jennifer Love Hewitt, and Scott Wolf. He waited for the call and then the show was cancelled. Dark times followed. Merchant Marines. Drank a lot. Killed a man. Then four more. One night, at a bar, he ran into John Ratzenberger, of <i>Cheers</i>, who reminded him that lots of cast from famous shows have never hosted. Michael Richards (Bill Hader) as Kramer rushes on stage--and he talks about a new act. He wants to co-host the show.

    Sale Mart - Sudeikis stars in this commercial parodying Wal-Mart. Kenan, Fred, Amy, Kristen are in this hilarious parody.

    CNN's Nancy Grace - Amy Poehler is back as Nancy Grace. She complains that someone has been using her lucky show pen. The big topic is the Michael Richards tirade. Joining her is Morehouse College Professor of African American Studies Albert Edwards (Kenan Thompson), who says he is not a victim and he was not at the Laugh Factory. He's not ashamed. Grace thinks that Richards should sue himself as they case would be Kramer vs. Kramer. The next topic is O.J. Simpson's book. She wants to show her reaction if she had watched the FOX special. Complains about the pen again. Addresses the legal issues. Greg Tanner (Fox), a Traffic Violations Specialist, is on as a guest because he gave her a ticket for parking in the wrong space. She asks him if he ever watched <i>Seinfeld</i>.

    Deep House Dish - Kenan Thompson is back as DJ Dynasty Handbag, hosting this techno-music show. Tiara Z (1984-2006) is no longer his guest as Rachel Dratch is no longer on the show. T'shane (Andy Samberg) is the new one. Beginning Changs (Maya Rudolph) performs her new hit "Tiny Moves" from her new CD, <i>Gay through Z</i>. DJ Luxe (Fox) performs "Get Started." He's dating Federline's ex, Prespears. Lateesa Stroh (Amy Poehler) sings "I Want Cologne for Christmas."

    LOST Fans - Matthew Fox plays himself. Fred Armisen is the guy in the elevator and he says that Fox has no idea whats going on in the island, and he doesn't give eye contact til later. Diane (Amy Poehler) and Karen (Maya Rudolph) enter the elevator. Armisen says that people should be caught up if they are big fans. Kenan Thompson is an UPS worker. Rudolph gets out of the elevator after getting spoiled. Andy Samberg gets on, saying it's purgatory. Amy says Kate has made a horrible mistake. Fox has been married for 15 years. Maya gets back in after running up the stairs.

    Tenacious D sings "Kickapoo."

    Weekend Update with Amy Poehler and Seth Meyers - Colin Powell said it;s time "face reality" and recognize that Iraq is in a civil war after growing retirement balls. The White House acknowledges that Iraq has entered a new phase. U.S. officials believe the Bush twins should come home from Argentina. Dennis Prager thinks Keith Ellison shouldn't take the Oath on the Koran instead of the Bible, showing pictures of Tom Delay, Mark Foley, and Richard Nixon. The Rockefelller tree was lit with Danny Devito. Al Sharpton (Kenan Thompson) and Jesse Jackson (Darrell Hammond) call it an unfortunate event with an opportunity to eradicate and cease using the n word. Calls on rap industry to replace it. Calls Kramer a solution. Kid Rock and Pamela Anderson file a divorce. A Michigan man became the third successful recipient of a hands transplant. In Montana, there is a bell ringer shortage. A trainer was hospitalized after Shamu attacked him. Reviewing the newest films, Aunt Linda (Kristen Wiig). Linda gives <em>Borat</em> an "Oh Ghaa." Casino Royale gets a double "Oh, brother!" <em>Apocalypto</em> recieves "Oh, Boy" and a "What?" New federal research is focusing on using honey bees to search at the airports. Britney Spears has stopped working on her new album and has been partying too much with Paris Hilton. Poehler gives a message for them. Thye make Tara Reid look like Audrey Hepburn. The World Chess Federaton has announced drug testing for Doha 2006. Germany announced plans for a spray-on condom. Whitney Houston (Maya Rudolph) has failed to make some payments. Her cell phone goes off twice.

    Crazy Mountain Man - Crazy Mountain Man (Fox) wants a piece of pie. Poehler and Wiig tell him to get back to the mountain. They make a deal for a kiss. Amy kisses and than Wiig does. Fox than asks if the scene was rewritten and then Amy and Kristen say it was rewritten during dress and live--and read the cards. It was ploy to get him to say something. Emily Spivey is the writer of the sketch. Matthew Fox breaks the fourth wall of comedy. Amy and Kristen apologize. Lorne Michaels (Maya) thinks he'll better by going to Lorne's office and make out with Maya. They all chase him.

    Math vs. History Buffs - Andy Samberg is a history major in college. His parents are Will Forte and Kristen Wiig. There's something he needs to tell them. He dropped history and changed majors. The two parents get upset. Will gets so upset when Andy wants to become a math whiz. They are getting into a fight. A professor of the history of math (Fox) says that it has to end and he asks why Will really hates math. He asks how many books are on the shelf. Will never learned to count and he is ashamed. The professor leaves and stole the televison.

    The History Channel - The voiceover is definitely Darrell Hammond. This sketch focuses on the Mayans. the Mayan King is played by Fred Armisen. The general is Matthew Fox. Fred asks Maya what the drink (chocolate) is. The taste of chocolate is new to Fred and Fox is asked to try him. It's sweet and bitter. Fox feels loathed. Bill Hader comes in and asks if they are drinking chocolate. Hader gives some advice and Fred commands everyone to make brownies. Andy Samberg says they are outnumbered. Ten minutes later, the entire Mayan culture was wiped out.

    Tenacious D sing "The Metal." A lot of the cast is in this sketch.

    December 9, 2006: Anette Bening with musical guest Gwen Stefani and Akon.