COLD OPENING: President Bush meets with Bill Frist to discuss Gas Plan segueing into informercial sales pitch.
MONOLOGUE: members of the Catholic clergy question host's movie and his hair.
WHEEL OF FORTUNE: contestants continuely answer incorrectly the letter of the puzzle.
KAITLIN GETS AN IGUANA: Kaitlin gets the chance to babysit the pet Iguana of Rick's friend Eli.
ARIELL & EPHRAIM (FILM): A flashback to 1991, leads to a Right Said Fred-esqe song called "Please Don't Cut My Testicles."
MA AT UNIVERSAL STUDIOS-- Two grown brothers at the Back to the Future venue at Universal Theme Park continuesly yell at their disoriented mother.
"Dani, California" (Musical Performance)
WEEKEND UPDATE: commentaries by Rosie O'Donnell on her appointment as the newest co-host of The View. Drs. Gunther and Patrick Kelly debate immigration issues via song.
CLAREMONT YOGA CENTER: Teddy's body odor and appearance offends a woman during yoga class.
COLIN'S PLACE: a Sanford and Son-esqe look at Colin Powell and his son Michael.
"Give It Away" (Musical Performance)
POMPOUS TENNIS PLAYERS: Country-Clubbers argue Tennis strategy along with their lack of or large amount of arms.