Turk: Dude, I'm dying here.
J.D.: Turk, it's been like eighteen hours since you had sex.
Turk: I'm saying, this is torture!
J.D.: So why don't you just, like, "take care of yo'self"?
Turk: Man, you know I don't do that.
J.D.: You don't?
Turk: Nah, I've only done that like twice in my life.
J.D.: Same here.
J.D.'s Narration: If by "in my life" you mean "since I came home."