An obvious homage to film students who love saying the word "homage," Scuba Wars courted a dedicated fanbase during its short time in the Caribbean sun. Our wet-suited heroes may not have outlived their television dry-run, but they charmed the flippers off of this viewer.
Scuba Wars was unpretentious, yet ambitious in scope. The code names "Red Team" and "Blue Team" underlined the inherent similarities between the two aquatic factions, whose age-old conflict seemed to rage more violently with every episode, reasserting itself in novel and entertaining ways.
Each episode begins with the unforgettable words from Major Higgins (rumored to be Thomas Magnum Jr.'s TV father), "Life began with water; so must it end. Even after crawling from that primordial sludge, that divine symmetry of hydrogen and oxygen fuels us, sustains us. It is our very essence. Now, two teams fight for control of the Caribbean reef, and the untold treasures that lie there, untouched by man since the fall of Atlantis." I'll admit that I didn't remember all of that; I have a few PSP-encoded episodes for reference. Anyway, I'm sure that all watching the show were as inspired by those words, spoken over the opening title crawl, as Higgins' highly-trained crew of ascot-sporting metrosexuals.
There are too many great episodes to mention: The time Roosevelt "RJ" Johnston discovered his allergy to polyester after a steamy tryst with disco Steve, or the episode in which Jacky Chang got hammered and mistook Higgins' "octopus" scuba breathing aparatus for one of his ex-wives. Scuba Wars brilliantly used comedy as a means of grappling with real issues that affect today's pre-teen Mayan billionaires.
Scuba Wars is one of those Fox shows that, although critically lauded, were canceled before their time. While court dramas and reality shows proliferate, the unfailingly original content, and fresh acting talent of Scuba Wars has been supressed. I am affording this show the highest score possible, in hopes that my readers will join me in petitioning Fox for Scuba Wars' reinstatement in its old Saturday timeslot.