Seinfeld - Season 7

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NBC (ended 1998)

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Episode Guide

  • The Invitations
    The Invitations
    Episode 24
    5/16/96
    8.4
    As George and Susan pick out their wedding invitations, George is desperate to find a way out of getting married. Kramer is obsessed with a bank's promise to pay $100 to any customer not greeted with 'hello'. Meanwhile, Jerry thinks he's fallen in love with a woman with the exact same personality as him.moreless
  • The Wait Out
    The Wait Out
    Episode 23
    5/9/96
    8.4
    After George makes an off-hand remark to a married couple with a rocky relationship, Jerry and Elaine wait in anticipation of their inevitable separation. Elaine sports a new hairstyle, starts driving again and almost makes Jerry car sick. Kramer starts wearing jeans again. The jeans are much too tight, so tight in fact, that he can't get them off when he really needs to. Elaine and Jerry make plans to move in on the separated couple, which they do. George feels guilty about breaking up the marriage and wishes to undo the damage. Jerry and Elaine physically oppose this action. David returns the off-hand remark to George in the presence of Susan. She tells George she has to think about some things- he thinks it is his ticket out.moreless
  • The Bottle Deposit (2)
    5/2/96
    8.6
    Wilhelm is delighted with the job George did on the project; however, he has no idea what he did or how he did it. The detective on the case thinks he's found Jerry's car, damaged beyond recognition. It's not, and later Jerry's mechanic calls him from the car. Kramer spots Jerry's car in Ohio. Steinbrenner calls George into his office about the project report and has him committed. Kramer ditches the cans, bottles, mailbags and Newman in pursuit of Jerry's car. Newman finds a farmer's house, complete with the proverbial daughter. The mechanic throws the clubs and bag at Kramer's truck, allowing him to get away. Deena is happy to see that George is getting the help he needs. Peterman is stunned when he finally gets the clubs, "Elaine, I never knew Kennedy had such a temper."moreless
  • 5/2/96
    8.6
    George doesn't hear the details on an important project that Wilhelm wants him to champion. Peterman wants Elaine to bid on a set of golf clubs at the Kennedy auction, her ceiling is $10,000; however, she gets into a bidding war with Sue Ellen, the Oh Henry! candy heiress. Consequently, she spends a bit more than she was authorized. Newman finds the missing ingredient to make it cost effective in Kramer's scheme to collect used pop bottles and cans and take them to Michigan where the refund is doubled. Jerry takes his car to a mechanic, who's fanatical about car care. Elaine meets Jerry to get the golf clubs out of his car, but the mechanic, distraught over Jerry's negligence, steals it. Kramer and Newman collect their bottles and cans and hit the road in a mail truck.moreless
  • The Calzone
    The Calzone
    Episode 20
    4/25/96
    9.2
    George becomes Steinbrenner's pet, when he shares an eggplant calzone with him. Kramer is raving about wearing clothes "straight out of the dryer." Jerry thinks that Elaine's boyfriend is dating her without really ever asking her out. He offers to bring Jerry some Cuban cigars from Canada. Jerry takes advantage of his girlfriend's ability to get anything she wants. Kramer searches for quarters for the dryer; when he can't find anymore, he starts using an oven. George gets into tip trouble with the counter guy at the calzone shop and he works out an arrangement with Newman. That is unless of course it's raining (Newman doesn't deliver mail in the rain); Kramer helps out.moreless
  • The Wig Master
    The Wig Master
    Episode 19
    4/4/96
    8.1
    Jerry uses Elaine to prove that a sales clerk is wrong about his looking at an expensive jacket. Elaine is picked up by the clerk. George has an unwanted house guest, a wig master for the touring company of "Joseph and the Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat." He also has found a parking lot that charges $75 dollars a month; Kramer decides to put his car there. Unfortunately, he leaves his apartment key there. When he can't get his key, he is allowed to borrow a pink Cadillac. Jerry is convinced the clerk is working Elaine. George discovers why the lot is so cheap, he finds a used condom in his car and is asking a prostitute for information, just as Susan approaches. George discovers that he may have an out with Susan; she says she must be able to trust him and have no doubts. Kramer stays at Jerry's apartment. Elaine has a walking stick she lets Kramer have. Jerry tries to return his jacket, but discovers that "spite" isn't a viable reason. Kramer is allowed to borrow the back up "Electric Color Dreamcoat." Jerry is put out, when both sexes assume he isn't in a relationship with the person he is with (Elaine in one instance, the Wig Master in the other). Kramer finds a fuzzy white hat. With all the parts put together, his new ensemble is a sight to behold, just ask the NYPD after he is caught pulling a prostitute out of his borrowed car.moreless
  • The Friars Club
    The Friars Club
    Episode 18
    3/7/96
    8.0
    Jerry is being sponsored for membership to the Friars' Club, but things go awry when he accidentally walks off with their jacket. George is excited when Jerry starts dating Susan's best friend and they can double date together. Kramer tries to copy Leonardo Da Vinci's sleep patterns, but it doesn't work out the way he'd hoped. Meanwhile, Elaine is suspicious that a coworker is faking being deaf.moreless
  • The Doll
    The Doll
    Episode 17
    2/22/96
    9.1
    George is spooked by a doll from Susan's collection that has an uncanny resemblance to his mother. Elaine is desperate to replace an autographed picture of the Maestro's that she ruined in Tuscany. Kramer joins Frank in his new billiard room and tries to help him track down a long lost cousin. Meanwhile, Jerry's interactions with Susan's old roommate spell trouble for his upcoming appearance on the Charles Grodin show.moreless
  • The Shower Head
    The Shower Head
    Episode 16
    2/15/96
    8.7
    Elaine gets a physical for a pending trip with Peterman to Africa. Her physical test results show positive for opium, so Peterman fires her. Jerry parent's are in seclusion in New York while biding time until they can move back to Florida. George tries to convince his parents to move to Florida. The shower heads in Jerry's building are being replaced with a new low-flow model; Newman finds a source for black market shower heads. The Seinfelds tell the Costanzas that there is no room for them in Florida that gives Frank all the incentive he needs to move. George is delighted. Elaine finds the cause of her opium addiction and finds a donor for her next physical. Jerry makes a joke on The Tonight Show with Jay Leno at the expense of Uncle Leo and he pays the price for making fun of the family.moreless
  • The Cadillac (2)
    The Cadillac (2)
    Episode 15
    2/8/96
    8.6
    Kramer continues to play with the cable guy. George's obsession with Marisa makes Susan suspicious. Elaine calls Jerry in Florida and tells him she wants to come and join him. Elaine gets George Marisa's phone number and now he needs her for an alibi (which involves her "boyfriend" Art Vandelay, an importer/ exporter). Morty's ace in the hole, to keep him from impeachment, is the woman that Jerry stole the marble rye from, only she doesn't remember him, at least at first. The cable guy zeros in on Kramer, but he gets away. George's meeting with Marisa doesn't go as well as planned and Susan thinks he's having an affair with Elaine. The cable guy concedes defeat.moreless
  • The Cadillac (1)
    The Cadillac (1)
    Episode 14
    2/8/96
    8.6
    Jerry surprises his parents by buying them a new Cadillac, when his last job really pays well. Kramer who now knows about what Jerry makes says it will change their relationship. It certainly changes his relationship with Elaine, she's interested again. George reconsiders his engagement when one of Elaine's friends tells him that she could have set him up with Oscar winning actress, Marisa Tomei. The cable company wants to see Kramer and he takes the opportunity to get revenge on them. George wants to meet Marisa for a cup of coffee, even when Elaine's friend is in the hospital with a heart condition. Jack Klompus accuses Morty of embezzling funds to pay for his new Cadillac.moreless
  • The Seven
    The Seven
    Episode 13
    2/1/96
    8.5
    Elaine sees a girl's bike she wants, but she strains her neck trying to getting the bike down from the wall. In pain she promises the bike to whoever fixes her neck. Kramer saves the day and wants the bike. George is angry when Susan's cousin chooses to name her baby with the name he planned to give his first offspring. He desperately tries to convince them to use another name. Kramer works out an arrangement with Jerry to keep track of what he takes from Jerry's kitchen. Jerry is curious when his girlfriend is always wearing the same dress, every time they go out.moreless
  • The Caddy
    The Caddy
    Episode 12
    1/25/96
    8.5
    Kramer befriends a caddy, who helps him to improve his golf game and offer his other advice. George's bosses consider him for a promotion when they think he is so dedicated to his work that he is there in the morning before everyone else and still there after they all leave. They don't know that he's just been leaving his car in the parking lot waiting for his free visit from a locksmith. Taking advantage of the situation, he and Susan go up north to her parent's rebuilt cabin. Elaine meets an old rival who's heir to the Oh Henry! candy bar fortune and has never worn a bra. She wears the bra as a top and cause Kramer and Jerry to have an accident with George's car. With George's damaged car in the parking lot, the Yankees think he's dead. Steinbrenner breaks the news to the Costanza's. Kramer and Elaine take her rival to court and only Jerry may stand in the way.moreless
  • The Rye
    The Rye
    Episode 11
    1/4/96
    9.4
    Elaine is dating a jazz saxophonist who's sponge-worthy but "he doesn't really like to do everything." Jerry tells one of the members of his band that the saxophonist and Elaine are "hot and heavy." Kramer stocks up on supplies, including 50 cans of "Beef-A-Reeno.". Susan's parents meet and have dinner with the Costanzas for the first time. Both families obsess over a loaf of rye bread that wasn't served with the meal, which Frank takes back home. Elaine's boyfriend writes a song about "their relationship," which later has a big impact on his career. Kramer takes over a friend's horse-drawn carriage for a week and helps George out with his scheme to replace the rye bread. Unfortunately, he feeds the horse a can of "Beef-A-Reeno" right before giving the Ross's their ride. Jerry manages to get his hands on a loaf of marble rye.moreless
  • The Gum
    The Gum
    Episode 10
    12/14/95
    9.3
    Kramer is active in the re-opening of an old movie theater. He also is keeping an eye on a friend, Lloyd, who's recovering from a nervous breakdown. Lloyd has a pack of Chinese gum that Kramer insists everyone tries. George thinks the cashier short-changed him and meets a former neighbor (who's had a breakdown) and his daughter, Deena. George lets his former neighbor look at his car. Elaine tries to avoid interacting with Lloyd, loses a button from her blouse and reveals herself to Lloyd and Kramer. Because of Elaine's lie, Jerry must wear glasses while around Lloyd. Deena tells George that she thinks he is showing signs of being on the verge of a breakdown. George's car, once owned by "Jon Voight" in "The Mom & Pop Store", catches fire. Elaine shows more to Lloyd. Jerry gets more gum. George keeps trying to convince Deena he's not crazy.moreless
  • The Sponge
    The Sponge
    Episode 9
    12/7/95
    8.4
    Jerry finds the number of girl he wants to contact on Kramer's AIDS walk sponsor list. After finding out that her preferred method of birth control is only available in a limited supply, Elaine must decide whether her current boyfriend is "sponge worthy." George tells Susan the secret of the size of Jerry's jeans and that leads to a fight about all secrets, he tells her another of Jerry's secrets when they make up. Jerry finds out that George told Susan one of his secrets and now he's "out of the loop." Elaine adjusts her screening process to find worthy candidates. Kramer causes a disturbance at the AIDS walk when he won't "wear the ribbon."moreless
  • The Pool Guy
    The Pool Guy
    Episode 8
    11/16/95
    8.8
    Elaine has tickets for a historical clothing exhibit and realizes that she has no female friends; Jerry suggests that she ask Susan. Kramer suggests that is the wrong move and that George's worlds will collide. Jerry meets his pool guy outside a movie, and then he can't get rid of him. George is worried by Elaine wanting to get to know Susan, then he finds out it was Jerry's idea. Kramer's new phone number is similar to a film information line. When Kramer keeps getting wrong numbers, he begins giving out the information for movie show times a la "Moviefone."moreless
  • The Secret Code
    Episode 7
    11/9/95
    8.5
    George tries to keep his ATM code a secret from Susan. Elaine is puzzled by a man she once met at a party and talked to for ten minutes, doesn't remember her, but he does remember other party details. Leapin' Larry, a one-legged man, wants Jerry to do spots for his store, but he is angered when he thinks Jerry is doing an impression of him. Kramer gets an emergency band scanner and decides to help reorganize operations at the NYFD. Elaine doesn't want to go on a date with her boss, the storyteller, so she leaves Jerry and George at the restaurant. Jerry escapes, but George isn't as lucky. He is forced to accompany Peterman to his Momma's house, where he winds up staying all night and tells her his secret code before she dies. That is her last word. George's code is needed in a life or death situation.moreless
  • The Soup Nazi
    The Soup Nazi
    Episode 6
    11/2/95
    9.6
    The gang all loves the soup from a new, temperamental cook unofficially called the "Soup Nazi". Jerry and his girlfriend are beyond affectionate, and their nickname "Schmoopie" drives George crazy. Elaine buys an antique armoire on the street, but it is stolen while being guarded by Kramer.
  • The Hot Tub
    The Hot Tub
    Episode 5
    10/19/95
    8.7
    George picks up a bad habit from some visiting baseball officials. During the time of the New York City Marathon, Elaine has an out of country runner as her house guest. The runner had overslept and missed the big race at the last Olympics and Jerry obsesses with ensuring that it doesn't happen again. Kramer gets a hot tub from his friend Lomez and Elaine has writer's block.moreless
  • The Wink
    The Wink
    Episode 4
    10/12/95
    8.6
    Elaine gets a blind date with the guy from her wake-up service; the only problem is he likes dogs. A bit of grapefruit pulp, from Jerry's healthy breakfast, gets into George's eye and causes problems for him when his winks keep getting misinterpreted. Jerry's healthy diet conflicts with his dating of Elaine's cousin. Kramer promises a sick boy, that New York Yankee, Paul O'Neill will hit two home runs for him, so he can get back a birthday card that he sold based on George's wink.moreless
  • The Maestro
    The Maestro
    Episode 3
    10/5/95
    8.4
    George is feeling the pressures of his relationship with Susan and decides that he needs to help a security guard that works at her uncle's store. Kramer's friend "Maestro", makes a comment about getting a rental property in Tuscany that makes Jerry decide to do some research. Elaine begins dating the "Maestro." Kramer's out of court settlement in his lawsuit against the coffee house, free coffee at any location around the world, gets him "hopped up on the caffeine." Jerry asks Poppy about Tuscany and is referred to Poppy's cousin, who makes him an offer he can't refuse.moreless
  • The Postponement
    The Postponement
    Episode 2
    9/28/95
    8.5
    Elaine's dog problem is solved by a neighborly rabbi with a cable show. Kramer's involvement in the dognapping worries him when he finds out about its impact on his permanent record. Overwhelmed with it all, George decides he wants to postpone the engagement. Elaine isn't "concerned" with George's intentions, but is really jealous that he's the first of the group to get engaged. The neighborly rabbi offers advice on her problem, that he later relates to Jerry and anyone else who'll listen. Kramer and Jerry try to see "Plan 9 From Outer Space"; however, Kramer "tries" to sneak in a gourmet coffee, spills it and his lawyer says he has a case.moreless
  • The Engagement
    The Engagement
    Episode 1
    9/21/95
    9.0
    Jerry and George reevaluate their relationships with women, so they make "a pact" to change their ways, though Jerry doesn't know it. Elaine has a problem sleeping in her new apartment because of a nearby constantly barking dog; Kramer recommends a solution. George gets back with Susan, his former girlfriend from NBC; he asks her to marry him, and after a couple hours of convincing she says yes. Kramer, his solution (Newman) and Elaine commit a dognapping and take the dog far out of the city. Jerry breaks up with his girlfriend again; however, George is now trapped in his relationship with Susan, almost to the point where he is married already. Elaine almost gets a good night of sleep.moreless
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