Season 3 Episode 11

The Alternate Side

Aired Thursday 9:00 PM Dec 04, 1991 on NBC
out of 10
User Rating
282 votes

By Users

Episode Summary

Jerry's car is stolen and the criminal picks up his car phone. George decides to take a fill-in job moving cars from one side of the street to the other; this turns into a disaster for local traffic flow. Kramer gets a chance to do a line in a Woody Allen film; "these pretzels are making me thirsty." Elaine gets tired of her 66-year-old boyfriend and when she is about to break up with him, he has a stroke.moreless

Who was the Episode MVP ?

  • A favorite of mine and typical Seinfeld -- taglines you know you repeat to this day. Not the most stand out episode, but memorable nonetheless.

    One of my favorite episodes, which, like so many others, gave you several "catch phrases" to repeat again and again: "Yankee Bean, Yankee Bean, IIIII liiike my Yan-kee B-ean!" and "You know how to take the reservation, but you don't know how to hold the reservation." and of course, "These pretzels are making me thirsty."

    While this isn't a classic episode like The Contest, The Junior Mint, or The Soup Nazi, I like the clever and goofy use of the tag line "These pretzels..." which, if you use allusions to TV in your everyday vocabulary, can be used in any situation. And who hasn't found themselves singing "Yankee Bean" for days after?

    A great showcase of each character's idiosyncrasies, George's uber-neuroticism; Elaine's ability to succumb to guilt, but only for a moment; Kramer's grandiose view of even the smallest of his activities, and Jerry's quick use of sarcasm as everything goes wrong around him.

  • Seinfeld

    This is a very funny episode of Seinfeld that has very funny stories in it and a famous line in it as well like all episodes this one is all the same well writing well acting and well jokes in the episode of Seinfeld the sense are never dull all of the stories blended well together which made the episode work a likeable to the viewer of the show my favorite scene is the one where George is parking the cars goes wrong and messes up the movie Kramer is working on this is the reason why my review for this episode of Seinfeld is 9.7 the endmoreless
  • Hilarious!

    I love this episode so much, Elaine dating a 66 year old, sort of slutty I would say. But the exciting part is in the end when Elaine brings the stroked out 66 year old and they put cookies in his mouth and George was blocking the road which made the 66 year old's chances more slim, I love how the plots tie in like that, absolutely amazing, Elaine acted really well in this episode as well. My favorite part which is the most funny, is when Jerry is renting the car & how Jerry is cracking jokes with Elaine, best moment In Seinfeld Season 3.moreless
  • Brilliant.

    An absolutely brilliant episode from the great back and forths between Sid and George (I don't want to get into a whole thing about the pants!) to the classic, series-defining scene at the rental car agency (I'm sorry my supervisor says there is nothing we can do!) this was just about as good as it gets.

    If you don't find this episode funny, you probably don't like this show as this is just nothing short of classic television. Jerry and George at their best, and Kramer being Kramer. Great episode that featured about 22 minutes of non-stop laughs, for me at least.moreless
Jay Brooks

Jay Brooks


Guest Star

Janet Zarish

Janet Zarish

Rental Car Agent

Guest Star

Edward Penn

Edward Penn

Owen March

Guest Star

Larry David

Larry David


Recurring Role

Trivia, Notes, Quotes and Allusions


  • TRIVIA (4)

    • After George comes out of the bathroom looking for a bucket of water, he comes out and looks out the window. In the very next shot, he is standing behind the counter drinking a soda, when he should be parking cars.

    • Owen is not wearing a sweater, when Elaine shows up at Jerry's apartment with him. He is wearing the same suit all through the time we see him in Jerry's apartament.

    • When Elaine shows up at Jerry's apartment with Owen, Owen is wearing a sweater, then a moment later he's lying on the couch wearing a suit, completer with shirt and tie.

    • When Kramer is first introduced into this episode, he leaves Jerry's apartment door open. The door is closed a few moments later.

  • QUOTES (22)

    • Jerry: (Closing monologue) I think the best part of a relationship is when you're sick. And the best part of being sick is when you're in a relationship. And if I was to get married, you know all those vows; for richer or for poorer, for better or for worse, all I need is the sickness. That, to me, is the most important one. Do you take this man in sickness? That's the only time I need somebody there. Rest of the time, go out, have a ball, do whatever you want, but if I get the sniffles, you better be there.

    • Jerry: (Opening monologue) Seems to me the way they design the car alarm is so that the car will behave as if it was a nervous hysterical person. Anyone goes near it, anyone disturbs it, it's aaaaaahhhhhhh! Lights flashing on and off, acting all crazy. Not everybody wants to draw that much attention to themselves, wouldn't it be nice if you could have a car alarm that was a little more subtle? You know, somebody tries to break in, it goes, Ahem. Ahem. Excuse me? I would like a car alarm like that.

    • Agent: Sir, if you had read the contract--
      Jerry: Did you see the size of that document? It was like the Declaration of Independence! Who's gonna read that?

    • Elaine: I'll be ostracized from the community.
      Jerry: What community? There's a community?
      Elaine: Of course there's a community.
      Jerry: All these years I'm living in a community, I had no idea.

    • Elaine: (singing to Owen) Yankee beans, Yankee beans, I like my Yankee beans.

    • Sid: (to George) Moving cars from one side of the street to the other don't take no more sense than puttin' on a pair of pants. My question to you is: who's puttin' your pants on?

    • Elaine: Could you go out with a 66-year-old woman?
      Jerry: Well, I'll tell ya, she would have to be really vibrant. So vibrant, she'd be spinning.

    • George: (taking the lunch check) Here, let me get that. I smashed your car, cost you $2,000...
      Jerry: Yeah, a cup of coffee should cover that.

    • Elaine: So, was Mia Farrow there?
      Kramer: Uh, I didn't see him.

    • Elaine: Can you die from an odor? I mean like if you were locked in a vomitorium for two weeks, could you actually die from the odor?
      Jerry: An overdose of odor? Good question.
      George: Do I smell?

    • George: Woody mentioned me? What did he say?
      Kramer: He said, "Who's the moron in the blue jacket who's got the street all screwed up?"

    • Paramedic: Who put cookies in his mouth?

    • Kramer: I might have a whole new career on my hands, huh?
      Jerry: You mean a career.

    • Elaine: Seven dates is a face-to-face break up?
      Jerry: If it was six I could have let you go, but seven, I'm afraid, is over the limit. Unless, of course, there was no sex.
      Elaine: Hmm... how's the pasta over there?

    • Elaine: (on Owen) I love being with him. I mean, I like being with him. It's okay being with him. (scene changes) I just don't enjoy being with him.

    • Rental Agent: Alright. We have a blue Ford Escort for you Mr. Seinfeld. Would you like insurance?
      Jerry: Yeah, you better give me the insurance, because I am gonna beat the hell out of this car.

    • Elaine: (on Owen) You'd really like him.
      Jerry: Why do people always say that? I hate everyone, why would I like him?

    • Jerry: Owen March? I never heard of him.
      Elaine: Well, he's not a baseball player.

    • Jerry: That's my car!
      Car thief: I didn't know it was yours.
      Jerry: What are you gonna do with it?
      Car thief: I dunno, drive around.
      Jerry: Then can I have it back?
      Car thief: Hmmm, nah. I'm gonna keep it.

    • Elaine: Guess who I bumped into. Owen.
      George: He's alright?
      Elaine: Yeah, he's almost fully recovered. He told me he was just using me for sex.

    • Jerry / Elaine / Kramer / George: These pretzels are making me thirsty!

    • Jerry: I don't understand. Do you have my reservation?
      Car Rental Assistant: We have your reservation, we just ran out of cars.
      Jerry: But the reservation keeps the car here, that's why you have the reservation.
      Car Rental Assistant: I think I know why we have reservations.
      Jerry: I don't think you do. You see, you know how to TAKE the reservation, you just don't know how to HOLD the reservation. And that's really the most important part of the reservation: the holding. Anybody can just take them.

  • NOTES (1)