Seinfeld

Season 6 Episode 16

The Beard

2
Aired Thursday 9:00 PM Feb 09, 1995 on NBC

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  • Quotes

    • Elaine: (about Jerry's lie that he doesn't watch Melrose Place) This is so stupid! Why don't you just confess?
      Jerry: It's too stupid to confess. Look what I'm confessing to.
      Elaine: Well, what are going to do?
      Jerry: I don't know. Maybe I could beat the machine.
      Elaine: Uh! Who do you think you are? Costanza?
      Jerry: Hey, you know what? I have access to one of the most deceitful, duplicitous, deceptive minds of our time. Who better to advise me?

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