Season 5 Episode 14

The Marine Biologist

Aired Thursday 9:00 PM Feb 10, 1994 on NBC
out of 10
User Rating
273 votes

By Users

Episode Summary

The Marine Biologist
Jerry meets an old college classmate who asked about George, whom Jerry says is now a "marine biologist." An infuriated Russian writer tosses an electronic organizer belonging to Elaine out of a limousine that hits a passerby on the head. Kramer struggles with his golf swing and sand. While walking along the beach, George is called on to use his marine biology skills to save a whale.moreless

Who was the Episode MVP ?

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  • Is that a Titelist?

    To me this is one of the quintessential Seinfeld episodes the payoff at the end with George's epic monologue was amazing and Kramer is at his gold standard here.
  • Real funny.

    This is a typical funny episode of Seinfeld. I think it wasn't as good as some of the other episodes, but it really is a 9. It had some funny bits here and there as well as some great comedic timing. I especially liked the writing, the acting, and the storylines for this episode. It was by far one of the best episodes in terms of entertainment and originality. Kramer golfed in the sand, Jerry was being annoying, Elaine had to deal with a writer, and George of course lied. It all came to a great ending when Krmaer was responsible for a whale incident. Thank you.moreless
  • "Is anyone here a marine biologist?"

    Kramer's love of golf causes problems for George. Jerry meets an old friend from high school and tells her that George is a successful marine biologist making way for another classic moment in the show's history. George has to keep up a lie purported by Jerry and it gets him in trouble after, when Kramer was golfing on the beach, a whale gets something stuck in its blowhole.

    This is a very funny episode. Larry David's line (Is anyone here a marine biologist?) punctuates another great Seinfeld season five episode. A winner in every way, shape and form. Another can't miss episode.moreless
  • Seinfeld

    In this episode of Seinfeld Jerry runs into a old college classmate that went to the same one as him and George and tells her that George is a marine biologist Kramer goes to the beach were he golf's into the ocean and Elaine get her electronic organizer thrown from the car window when she is riding with a writer who is fixing to get a book published by her company all in all a very funny episode that was done well not a dull moment in the episode all the stories in episode where written well my rating is 9.7moreless
  • Hilarious episode.

    This is one of my all time favorite episode's of Seinfeld. For those of you who haven't seen it before it is practically about George pretending to be a Marine Biologist for a girl from his college. This is just a classic episode because it ends when George takes a golf ball out of a whale's sperm hole, which coincidentally Kramer hit in. Because previously Kramer had been practicing golf when he hit the golf balls into the sea. I love the episode at the end when George retells the story. So it is episodes like these that make Seinfeld a great show.moreless
Carol Kane

Carol Kane


Guest Star

George Murdock

George Murdock


Guest Star

Rosalind Allen

Rosalind Allen


Guest Star

David Blackwood

David Blackwood

Hotel Clerk

Recurring Role

Wayne Knight

Wayne Knight


Recurring Role

Larry David

Larry David

Man on Beach (uncredited)

Recurring Role

Trivia, Notes, Quotes and Allusions


  • TRIVIA (4)

    • Larry David is heard but not seen in this episode. In the scene on the beach, he delivers the line, "Is anyone here a marine biologist?!"

    • George starts walking towards the water, and once he starts wading in, his pantlegs have miraculously been rolled up.

    • George is telling the story of his encounter with the whale... the whale let out a great bellow and George calms the whale "easy big fella". As he says this, Elaine has her arm resting on the table. A split second later, her arm is upright. Minor goof.

    • At the beginning of the episode George tells Jerry about a program he saw about whales, he mentions that the marine biologists are amazing. Yet when Jerry tells George that he's met a woman they used to go to school with and he told her that George is a marine biologist, George claims that he didn't know that marine biologists "was a profession". Has George forgotten the program he saw the night before and told Jerry about earlier?

  • QUOTES (14)

    • Kramer: (points to his head) I've got all my appointments right up here.

    • Elaine: What, are you in a bad mood?
      Jerry: I got my laundry back.
      Elaine: Golden Boy?
      Jerry: He didn't make it.
      Elaine: I'm sorry.
      Jerry: This is Golden Boy's son, Baby Blue.

    • George: (to Jerry) Why couldn't you make me an architect? You know I always wanted to pretend that I was an architect.

    • Jerry: (trying to make George look good) He's working on lowering the cholesterol level in whales. All that blubber, it's quite unhealthy. You know, it's the largest mammal on earth. But as George says, they don't have to be.

    • Jerry: Your mother reads your mail?
      George: Yeah.
      Jerry: What do you mean, like postcards?
      George: Oh, anything.
      Jerry: She doesn't open.
      George: She'll open.
      Jerry: You've caught your mother opening envelopes?
      George: Yes.
      Jerry: What does she say?
      George: I was curious.
      Jerry: Isn't that against the law?
      George: Maybe I can get her locked up.

    • Jerry: Six years I've had this t-shirt. It's my best one. I call him Golden Boy.

    • Jerry: Did you know that the original title for 'War and Peace' was 'War, What Is It Good For?'

    • George: The sea was angry that day, my friends - like an old man trying to send back soup in a deli. I got about fifty feet out and suddenly the great beast appeared before me. I tell you he was ten stories high if he was a foot. As if sensing my presence, he let out a great bellow. I said, "Easy, big fella!" And then, as I watched him struggling, I realized that something was obstructing its breathing. From where I was standing, I could see directly into the eye of the great fish.
      Jerry: Mammal.
      George: Whatever.
      Kramer: Well, what did you do next?
      George: Well then, from out of nowhere, a huge tidal wave lifted me, tossed me like a cork, and I found myself right on top of him - face to face with the blowhole. I could barely see from the waves crashing down upon me but I knew something was there. So I reached my hand in, felt around, and pulled out the obstruction.
      (George reveals the obstruction to be a golf ball)
      Kramer: What is that, a Titleist?
      (George nods)
      Kramer: Hole in one, huh?

    • George: (to Jerry) It's one thing if I make it up. I know what I'm doing; I know my alleys. You got me in the Galapagos Islands living with the turtles. I don't know where the hell I am!

    • George: Then of course with evolution, the octopus lost the nostrils and took on the more familiar look that we know today.

    • Kramer: Hey... Who wants to have some fun?
      Jerry/George: I do!
      Kramer: Now are you just saying you want to have fun, or do you really want to have fun?
      Jerry: I really want to have fun!
      George: I'm just saying I want to have some fun.
      Kramer: I've got five hundred Titleists that I got from the driving range in the trunk of my car. Why don't we drive out to Rockaway, and hit 'em.... into the ocean! Picture this: we find a nice sweet spot between the dunes, take out our drivers, we tee up, and poof! The ball goes sailing up into the sky, holds there for a moment, and then: uggh!

    • George: As I made my way past the breakers, a sudden calm came over me. I don't know if it was divine intervention, or the kinship of all living things. But I tell you Jerry, at that moment, I was a marine biologist.

    • Diane: What's going on over here?
      Woman: There's a beached whale, she's dying.
      Man: (yelling) Is anyone here a marine biologist?

    • George: It was at that moment I decided to tell her that I was not a marine biologist.
      Jerry: Wow! What did she say?
      George: She told me to go to hell and I took the bus home.

  • NOTES (1)

    • Rosiland Allen (who plays Diane in this ep) played Wendy Smith on Seaquest DSV, a show about a submarine that has a dolphin crew member - and this episode centers around George pretending to be a marine bioligist to date her.


    • Jerry: The original title of "War and Peace" was War, what is it good for?

      War is a soul song written by Edwin Starr that protests the war in Vietnam. Jerry cited the first line of the song.

    • George: I'm working on my Jack Nicholson. 'You can't handle the truth!'

      "You can't handle the truth!" was Jack Nicholson's famous line from the 1992 film "A Few Good Men".