Elaine gets bad service at a clothing store, so she begins shopping at another similar store. Jerry notices that he is on his girlfriend's speed dial. Kramer plans for his millennium New Year's Eve party two years in advance and he has some strange ideas about what life in that year will be like. George is "offered" a position as director of scouting by the Mets. To get the position he must be fired by the Yankees. Elaine flaunts her purchases in front of the store. Jerry obsesses about his position on the speed dial and then he makes it to number 1. Kramer discovers that Newman is planning his own millennium party. George tries to make a big exit from the Yankees organization; however, all his attempts make him look better in the organization. The overprotective and overbearing mother of Jerry's girlfriend confronts him over his #1 position on the speed dial. Newman compromises with Kramer about their respective parties, they will be combined; however, he only has one condition, the next century must be "Jerry free." Elaine discovers the clothing store she began frequenting is owned by the same woman who didn't help her at the other store. Kramer reluctantly agrees but then has misgivings and gets Elaine to come back to his party. Elaine plans her revenge on the store with Kramer's help. Jerry gets caught in the middle of a speed dial war between his girlfriend and her step-mother.moreless
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Elaine Marie Benes (not in pilot)
George Louis Costanza
GOOF Although Jerry's argument regarding the true arrival of the new millenium being the year 2001 is understood and well-received by the viewing audience, there is an editorial goof in how he explains it to Newman. The revelation is that Newman has scheduled his party one year too early. Yet Jerry tells him, "...Which would make your party one year late...and thus, quite lame."
"Cinco De Mayo" is shown as a store from Peru. "Cinco de Mayo" is Spanish for "Fifth of May," a holiday in Mexico.
George and Wilhelm both sing lyrics to "Meet the Mets" that don't exist.
In syndication this episode is cut VERY bad. Bad to the point where I can't even watch it. Right after the scene when they are in Jerry's apartment and Kramer is pretending to talk to Newman and says you wanna talk to Jerry there is a scene right after that in which Jerry gives his girlfriend flowers then he then runs over to the speed-dial and he notices that he is now number 1 and he says "Number 1, Seinfeld you magnificent bastard". This scene is very important. The episode makes no sense without it. Without that scene we would have no idea why the stepmother is mad because she questions him about his number 1 spot but in the syndicated episode we never see him make it to number 1. Luckily for me I have the original episode with this scene but it's a shame to ruin such a funny episode to the point where it can't be enjoyed. (seoarrow)
When Elaine tries to leave the store in a huff, at the very beginning, she pushes on the door and it doesn't open, since it opens inwards. In most cities, fire codes prohibit businesses from having have exit doors that only open inwards.
Jerry takes his girlfriend out on a great date to try to move to the number 1 spot on her speed dial. When they return from the date Jerry immediately checks her speed dial and discovers he's moved up to the number 1. Surely his girlfriend would only have moved him to the number 1 spot after the date and not before.
Jerry: Good meeting?
George: There was no meeting. But it was quite a meeting.
Newman: I guess I can accept a little Jerry if it gets me a lot of Elaine.
Kramer: So Jerry, my millennium party is really coming together. Will people be able to breathe under water in the year 2000?
Jerry: Some of us.
Kramer: I don't want to exclude anybody.
George: You are looking at the next director of Mets scouting. Only thing is I have to get fired from the Yankees first.
Jerry: You can do that.
George: Of course, but I really want to leave my mark this time. You know, I want to walk away from the Yankees with people saying, 'Wow, now that guy got canned.'
Jerry: So you want to go out in a final blaze of incompetence.
George: Yeah, remember that summer at Dairy Queen where I cooled my feet in the soft serve machine?
Elaine: Shove it.
George: Jerry. I can't get fired.
George: Never thought I'd fail at failing.
Jerry: Oh, come on, now.
George: Feel like I can't do anything wrong.
Jerry: Nonsense. You do everything wrong.
George: You really think so?
Jerry: Absolutely. I have no confidence in you.
Newman: For me, the next millennium must be Jerry-free!
Steinbrenner: Babe Ruth was nothing more than a fat old man with little-girl legs. And here's something I just found out recently. He wasn't really a sultan.
Mrs. Hamilton: It's taken me thirteen years to climb to climb up to the top of that speed dial and I don't intend to lose my spot to you.
Jerry: But I never--
Mrs. Hamilton: You just stay away from that phone.
Elaine: I've been dancing and strutting in front of their store for two days.
Jerry: Oh, no wonder we're getting so much rain.
Jerry: Good meeting?
George: There was no meeting. But it was quite a meeting.
George: Hey, so get this. I got a call this morning from one of the Mets' front office guys. They want to take me out to lunch.
Jerry: What for?
George: I'm on a winning ball club, Jerry. They probably want to pick my brain.
Jerry: Really, why do you think they're taking you out to lunch.
George: I have no idea.
George: I guess I just have to pick myself up, dust myself off, and throw myself right back down again.
Jerry: That's the spirit. You suck.
George: I know.
Jerry: Kramer, these balloons aren't gonna stay filled until New Years!
Kramer: Those aren't for New Years…those are my everyday balloons.
Valerie: Ready to go? I don't wanna miss the previews.
Jerry: Me neither. I love the previews. In fact I enjoy being in the theatre cut up. Last week after a preview, I yelled out 'Must miss'.
Valerie: I think that I was in that theatre. That, that was really funny.
Jerry: Yeah, it got a good laugh.
Kramer: You knew I was having a millennium party, but you just had to throw yours on the same day!
Steinbrenner: I owe you an apology, body suit man. Streak on!
Kramer: Do you think people will still be using napkins in the year 2000, or is this mouth-vacuum thing for real?
Valerie: Who's this?
Jerry: It's Jerry. Who's this?
Valerie: Uh, it's Valerie.
Jerry: Oh, hi Valerie. What's up?
Valerie: I'll tell you what's up. My stepmother is violently ill, so I hit the button for poison control and I get you!
Jerry: Poison Control?! Wow! That's even better than number 1!
(Valerie hangs up the phone.)
George: What's a barometer exactly?
Kramer: It's pronounced thermometer.
(driving circles in the Yankee Stadium parking lot yelling on a bull horn with a trophy trailing his car)
George: Attention, Steinbrenner and front office morons! Your triumphs mean nothing! You all stink. You can sit on it… and, rotate! This is George Costanza! I fear no reprisal! Extension 5-1-7-0!!
The idea for the Putumayo storyline was nailed when a rude florist refused to sell writer Jennifer Crittenden some ribbon.
Newman said his party was on the "millennium" new year, which Jerry correctly knew would be the year 2001. Therefore, Newman's "millennium" New Year's party would be a year later than the party the world was preparing for, which was 2000. Whether Newman knew the difference is questionable -- he could have thought the millennium was 2000, or he could have known otherwise but just thought 2001 would be the year everyone would be partying. Either way, Jerry is correct.
Lauren Graham, who would later star in the WB's Gilmore Girls, appears in this episode. This is one of many Seinfeld appearances by actors who would later get their own major series.
Kramer: Come midnight, when she's looking for someone warm and cuddly to kiss, I guess you'll be caught between the moon and New York City.
Kramer makes an allusion to "Arthur's Theme" (1981) by Christopher Cross: "If you get caught between the moon and New York City, the best that you can do is fall in love." Newman mentioned before that he had booked Christopher Cross for his party.
When Jerry sees that he is #1 on Valerie's speed dialer he exclaims, "Seinfeld, you magnificent bastard!" This references the 1970 film "Patton" wherein George C. Scott (as Patton) says, "Rommel, you magnificent bastard -- I read your book!" Jerry even manages to capture Scott's gruff tone.
Some of Jerry's exchanges with Mrs. Hamilton are a clever nod to the Dustin Hoffman and Anne Bancroft characters in the 1967 film "The Graduate."
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