Season 4 Episode 13

The Pick

Aired Thursday 9:00 PM Dec 16, 1992 on NBC



  • Trivia

    • Jerry and Newman don't say their "Hello"'s like they usually do.

    • When Kramer is in the Calvin Klein meeting room in his jockies and he slides down the wall, he leaves a giant smear of body makeup on the wall.

  • Quotes

    • George: Was it a scratch or a pick?
      Jerry: It was a pick!
      George: Hey, it's me you're talking to! Was there any nostril penetration?
      Jerry: (stutters) There may have been some accidental penetration!

    • George: Is this Elaine? (picks up the card)
      Dana: Yeah.
      George: Huh! (makes an unusual look to the card)

    • Elaine: I don't know but… I think I see your…
      (scene ends)

    • George: So we go to her apartment and she goes to the bathroom. I'm cursing myself, "now how do I get out of here?" Then it hit me like a bolt of lightning. The pick!

    • Jerry: Are we not human?! If we pick, do we not bleed?!

    • Co-worker: (Pokes his head into the doorway) Hey, Nip, you need that manuscript or can I take it home?
      Elaine: Yeah, take it! Take it! And stop calling me "Nip"!

    • Jerry: But I was clearly on the outer edge of the nostril.
      Tia: I know what I saw. (Turns toward the elevators)
      Jerry: But there, but there was no pick! I, I did not pick! There was no pick!
      Tia: I gotta go. (she quickly walks away from Jerry)
      Jerry: No! No pick!

    • George: Two weeks ago I tried a soft boiled egg. Never liked it before. Now I'm dunking a piece of toast in there and I'm loving it.
      Susan: I'm not a soft boiled egg.
      George: And I am not a piece of toast.

    • George: Hey! How come I didn't get a Christmas card? Everybody else got one. Jerry got one, Kramer got one. I thought we were good friends. I don't get a Christmas card. I don't get it.
      Elaine: You want a Christmas card? You want a Christmas card? All right here. (rubs George's head on her breasts) Here's your Christmas card.

    • Jerry: Let me ask you something. If you were going out with somebody and if she did that what would, would you do? Would you continue going out with her?
      George: No. That's disgusting!

    • Jerry: Is that so unforgivable? Is that like breaking a commandment? Did God say to Moses thou shalt not pick?

    • Jerry: What? So what? It's a nipple. A little brown circular protuberance. What's the big deal? See everybody's got them. See I got them. (lifts up shirt)
      Kramer: I got them too. (lifts up shirt also)
      Jerry: See? Everybody's got them.

    • Jerry: Here. Take a look at this card. Tell me if you notice anything unusual about it.
      Newman: Yeah, your nipple's showing.

    • Elaine: So, what's that?
      Kramer: (not noticing) That's a nipple.
      Elaine: Right!!
      Kramer: (notices it) Ooo!
      Elaine: Aw, great!? Didn't you see that?
      Kramer: Aw, no, no I didn't notice it. No.

    • Elaine: (shocked) That's my nipple. My nipple's exposed. I sent this card to hundreds of people! My parents. My boss. Ah, Nana and Papa.

    • Jerry: Did you look at look at this picture carefully?
      Elaine: Carefully?
      Jerry: Because I'm not sure and … and … and correct me if I'm wrong but I think I see a nipple.

    • George: What is with this damn zipper?

    • Kramer: THE BEACH!!! (enters the apartment) You smell like the beach. What's the name of that perfume you're wearing?
      Tia: It's Ocean by CALVIN KLEIN.
      Kramer: CALVIN KLEIN? No, no. That's my idea. They, they stole my idea. Y'see I had the idea of a cologne that makes you smell like you just came from the beach.
      Jerry: I know look at this (shows an ad from CK)
      Kramer: (shocked) Whooo! That's you! What is going on here? The gyp, he laughs at me then he steals my idea. I could have been a millionaire. I could have been a fragrance millionaire, Jerry. They're not going to get away with this. (leaves)

    • Kramer: What's the matter with you? I just wanted to see how tall she was.
      Jerry: Oh, you're tall. She's tall I'm tall. What's the difference who's tall? We're all tall.

    • Kramer: I just wanted to borrow your "Dust Buster."

    • Jerry: So, I'm thinking of putting in a tropical fish tank right here.
      Tia: Are you sure you're ready for that kind of commitment?
      Jerry: Well, I figure if it doesn't work out I can always flush them down the toilet.
      Tia: That's horrible!

    • George: (singing) Oh hey, if you happen to see the most beautiful girl who walked out on me. Tell her I'm sorry. Tell her I need my baby, oh, won't you tell her. I love her. Oh, hey…
      Jerry: George I'm afraid I'm going to have to ask you to leave.

    • George: She made a big breakfast every Sunday. I don't know what she put in those eggs.

    • Elaine: Not only didn't you love her, you didn't even like her.
      George: Who says?
      Elaine: You did.

    • Jerry: Volunteer work… See, that's what I love about the holiday season. That's the true spirit of Christmas. People being helped by people other than me. That makes me feel good inside.

    • Elaine: Date with Fred.
      Jerry: The religious guy???
      Elaine: He's not THAT religious!
      Jerry: Let us pray...

    • Elaine: Let me tell you, I didn't intentionally expose myself, but, now, I wish I had. For it is not me, but you who have been exposed, for I have seen the nipple on your soul!

    • Jerry: I am not an animal!

    • CK Representative: His buttocks are sublime.

  • Notes

  • Allusions

    • Jerry: If we pick, do we not bleed? I am not an animal!
      Shylock in "The Merchant of Venice": "If you prick us, do we not bleed?" The Elephant Man: "I am not an animal! I am a human being!"

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