Sex and the City

Season 4 Episode 18

I Heart NY

Aired Sunday 9:00 PM Feb 10, 2002 on HBO
out of 10
User Rating
150 votes

By Users

Episode Summary

Carrie accidentally finds out that Big is planning on moving away from NY and wonders if she should have goodbye sex with him. She tries to have a romantic evening with him, but Miranda goes into labor and Carrie has to ditch Big to join her friend at the hospital. Miranda still doesn't feel maternal at all – she doesn't want to be motivated to push and she gets annoyed every time Steve cries about the baby. Meanwhile, Charlotte sees her ex husband and his mother at the museum and decides it's time to date again, but her date freaks out with her apartment. Samantha wears a wig to catch Richard cheating on her with another woman.moreless

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  • Carrie is shocked to have to say goodbye to Mr. Big and plans a last night out in NY with him. Miranda gives birth to Brady. Charlotte has a date with a divorced man. Samantha catches Richard 'eating out' with someone else.moreless

    This is my favourite episode. There is something about the mood of the episode from the opening scene to the end credits that just takes my breath away. I don't know if it's the fact that the city itself looks so amazing, or that the dialogue is so haunting, but there is just something bewitching about it. The fact that it was dedicated to the city itself after the 911 attacks, is touching, and anyone will tell you that after that the city changed forever. I also feel that after this episode, the show changed forever too. It never really felt the same after this episode. I don't think they ever wrote so well again. I am leaving out the bits about Charlotte and Samantha, not because I don't love the scenes with them, or because I think they aren't important, but because to me this episode will always be about Carrie and Big.

    The episode opens with Carrie in bed, alone. It is an episode about changes, but also about how some things in life become so ingrained in you that even time cannot change them. It is one of the most touching things on television I have ever seen.

    Carrie calls Big and they have the most natural and beautiful conversation that I think they have ever had. She tells him that she feels lonely and asks if she can come over, just for the company! The dialogue between them is incredible. You can tell, that despite all that has passed between them, the chemistry that they share is still there. I'm not talking about the sexual chemistry either. I'm talking about the kind of chemistry that can only be explained as mystical. Here are these two people, who at their very cores are in many ways very similar, but at the same time they often appear to be very different people. We don't always see them as a perfect match, or a great fit, and they have made many mistakes in the past. Yet it's almost as if there is an unspoken understanding between them. Something that only they know, and only they can fully understand. Even though they are no longer together and we know that they haven't seen each other much lately, it makes no difference. The relationship that they share is timeless. I think that this is what makes the next scenes so shocking and so painful to watch, but at the same time so beautiful and hopeful. When Carrie arrives at the empty apartment and Big tells her he is leaving the fantastic dialogue continues. Carrie is so shocked that she almost doesn't know how to react. Of course there's her usual questions, and Big's usual hilarious answers, but you just get the sense that nothing is ever going to be the same. When she says that he can't leave NY because he is the Chrysler Building, we see just how important he is to her. Then of course there is the 'Moon River' scene, which requires tissues. I can't listen to that song now without thinking of those two dancing. I know it's from Breakfast at Tiffany's and I wonder if that's why they chose the song. It's already associated with NY and it's a classic. A perfect metaphor for Carrie and Big really. I love the way the record jumps, serving as an appropriate description of their relationship, and as a jolt for Carrie to return to the real world and face the harsh reality that Big is really leaving. She arranges to take him out for a classic night in NY as she can't let him go without one last night on the town. Carrie then contemplates whether or not she should sleep with Big one last time. Telling the girls that he is this great man in her life and he is leaving. That makes me cry too. Even though they are not together, she has never really let go of him and despite all the bad things that happened she still thinks of him fondly and with admiration. Whilst in the buggy, in Central Park, Big tells her that he will miss her, and they kiss and we think that they will sleep together, but again they are interrupted by Miranda, who is about to give birth so Carrie leaves Big alone in the buggy. As she gets out at the Hospital Big calls her name and then he just winks at her and she just smiles. See, again no words, but none are needed here. We completely get it. As if we weren't already in agony, it gets even more emotional. Miranda gives birth, and as Carrie says, just like that life comes in and things start to change. After Brady is born Carrie rushes off to see Big before he leaves, but she is too late. Again I think this was a great decision. Some people think that there should have been some closure here, but the thing is that I don't want closure. I want those two to always be the way they are right at that moment. I think that if Carrie had slept with Big it would have made no difference whatsoever, and would have undermined their relationship and what it stands for. It isn't just about the Sex or the City, it's about two people who are clearly meant to be, but timing has got in the way. It's a more accurate description of reality than the fairytale ending that we were all expecting. Yes it's harsh and upsetting, but it's real. In his apartment she finds the Henri Mancini record, with the note saying 'If you ever feel lonely', Big's way of saying 'Don't forget me', and a plane ticket saying 'if I ever feel lonely', his way of saying 'I won't forget you', She then walks down the street and picks up a fallen leaf, and contemplates fate and mistakes. I like the idea that the mistakes we make are what shape us and make us who we are. It gives a meaning to all the randomness that seems to go on around us and gives us hope that no matter how painful things are that everything happens for a reason.

    The ending scene shows Carrie at her window where she writes that seasons change, so do cities, people come into your life, and people go, but it's comforting to know that the ones you love are always in your heart and if you are very lucky a plane ride away. I cannot think of a more beautiful way to sum up life and love and loss. I totally agree, that even if we can't be with the ones that we love, for whatever reasons, they are always in our hearts. It's strangely comforting to think that, and it gives me a sense of peace. Yes Big has gone from NY, but he isn't gone from Carrie's heart or her life. Yes things have to change, nothing can stay the same forever, but ultimately we never forget the people or places who have shaped our lives and made us who we are. It also makes me think that sometimes in matters of love it's not always about big romantic gestures or huge declarations of love, but it's more about the feeling of peace and contentment inside that you get just from knowing that somewhere out there, is someone who has you in their heart. A beautiful episode, and one that I will keep in my heart forever.moreless
  • I heart Sex and the City

    This Episode Touched My \"Heart\" Episode Ever. My Girl Samantha proves that she her heart can be broke when Richard is caught with another \"younger\" woman. Miranda has a beautiful little boy with Steve and Big Moves away to Napa. Everytime I hear the song \"Moon River\" I think about Big and Carrie dancing in his empty apartment. It also shows that even though the men in their lives are very important. The love they have for one another is even greater. I think that this is the best show on TV. Nothing else will ever come close to it.moreless
  • Big is leaving, Maranda has a baby

    This is one of the best episodes in the series. The storyline with Carrie and Big is so touching. I love everything about how the writers show that she still cares about him and that he cares about her in his own way. The use of the record to tie it togehter is also very sweet. The other stories are somewhat silly when standing next to the main. Samantha finds that Richard is cheating in a campy wig wearing way, Charlett goes out on a date with a crazy guy anf Miranda hasa baby. The main story makes this great though for me. One of the best.moreless
  • Great season finale

    Big is really leaving and it was so he

    artbreaking. They totally sparked in this episode (as usual) and I was so sad for Carrie that she didn't get her proper goodbye. It was nice that she was there for Miranda though.

    I still wish Big hadn't just left. It would have been nice to get them back together for real this time!

    The birth of little Brady was a little unnatural. Did you see how Miranda didn't even scream or something? Strange...

    I'm so sorry for Samantha, she was in love and he crushed her heart... :-( Now she's probably getting back to her old self ;-)moreless
Terry Maratos

Terry Maratos


Guest Star

Pete Corby

Pete Corby


Guest Star

Tom Cappadona

Tom Cappadona

NYC Cab Driver

Guest Star

Chris Noth

Chris Noth

Mr. Big

Recurring Role

David Eigenberg

David Eigenberg

Steve Brady

Recurring Role

Kyle MacLachlan

Kyle MacLachlan

Trey MacDougal

Recurring Role

Trivia, Notes, Quotes and Allusions


  • TRIVIA (3)

    • Darren Star himself has confirmed that this episode is a 'love letter' to New York, in honor of the events of September 11, 2001

    • Brady is born at the end of this episode. The episode is set in the early fall. When Miranda discovers she is pregnant, she says Steve is the father because he is the only guy she slept with that summer. This means that either she was pregnant for 3 months or a little over a year.

    • The Hospital set in this episode dubbed as Mount Sinai is the same one used as a hospital in Philadelphia in "My Motherboard, My Self", when Miranda went there to see her mother.

  • QUOTES (15)

    • Samantha: Where were you on your lunch break? I stopped by your office and you weren't there.
      Richard: I was eating.
      Samantha: Eating? Eating who?

    • Big: I can't believe you're leaving me alone with a horse and buggy.
      Carrie: Thanks for the ride Prince Charming.
      Big: Anytime.

    • Charlotte: Miranda had a boy!
      Samantha: Just what the world needs, another man.

    • Carrie: You can't leave New York, you're the Chrysler Building!

    • Carrie: Maybe our mistakes are what make our fate. Without them, what would shape our lives? Perhaps if we never veered off course we wouldn't fall in love, or have babies, or be who we are. After all, seasons change. So do cites. People come into your life and people go. But it's comforting to know that the ones you love are always in your heart. And if you're very lucky, a plane ride away.

    • (Carrie calls Mr. Big because she's lonely)
      Mr. Big: Is this who I think it is?
      Carrie: Who do you think it is?
      Mr. Big: Princess Grace of Monaco.
      Carrie: She's dead.
      Mr. Big: So you can imagine my surprise.

    • Samantha: Sex with an ex can be depressing. If it's good, you don't have it anymore. If it's bad, you just had sex with an ex.

    • Miranda: When this gets going, don't let anyone get all cheerleadery on me. I don't want any of that, you can do it, push push shit!

    • Carrie: So what are you gonna do out in Napa besides watch grapes shrivel?

    • Samantha: You want out of this, just say it.
      Richard: I don't wanna have sex once and I want out?
      Samantha: Not just once, what about yesterday?
      Richard: We were at the opera.
      Samantha: I was bored!

    • Steve: Wow, we're making something for little Danny.
      Miranda: Don't cry Steve.

    • Carrie(v.o): I got to thinking about fate. That crazy concept that we're not really responsible for the course our lives take. That it's all predestined, written in the stars. Maybe that explains why, if you live in a city, where you can't even see the stars, your love life tends to feel a little more random. And even if our every man, every kiss, every heartache, is pre-ordered from some cosmic catalogue, can we still take a wrong step and wander off our own personal milky way? I couldn't help but wonder, can you make a mistake and miss your fate?

    • Carrie (to Mr. Big): Well when you're tired you take a napa you don't move to Napa.

    • Samantha: Hi, my name is Samantha and I am a love-aholic.
      Carrie, Miranda and Charlotte: Hi, Samantha!

    • Samantha: This love stuff is a motherfucka.
      Charlotte: Did you just say love?

  • NOTES (2)

    • Music:
      "Floaters" by Rob Mounsey, as Carrie is sleepless on a cool fall night and when Carrie gets out of the carriage and looks back at Big.
      "Moon River" by Perry Como, as Carrie and Big dance in his apartment.
      "Through The Window" by Nancy Shane, as Carrie thinks and types about fate.
      "Tim's Cocktail Piano" by Tim O'Neill, as Charlotte is on a date with Eric.
      "Hard To Say Goodbye" by Toots Thielemans, as Big and Carrie take a carridge ride through the park.
      "Altered Cowboys" by Marc Black and The Accidental Orchestras, as Samantha spies on Richard.

    • The following message was shown at the end of the episode.

      Dedicated to our city of New York...
      then, now and forever.


    • Carrie calls Miranda "Mommie biggest," a reference to the 1981 movie Mommie Dearest. The movie was about Joan Crawford and her abusive behavior towards her adopted children.