Sex and the City Season 3 Episode 2

Samantha: You shop at the Boy's Department.
Jeff: So what? The clothes fit me better, plus they're cheaper. Where do you shop, the Big and Tall Horse Store?
Samantha: Hmmhmm. You know, you're nothing but a big dick with a little man attached.
Jeff: You're nothing but a big pair of tits with too much extra leg room.
Samantha: (Bursts into laughter)
Carrie: (voiceover) Surprisingly, Samantha had found what she was really looking for, and it had nothing to do with size.
Jeff: Hey! Somebody get me a booster chair!
Carrie: (voiceover) She had found a man who made her laugh. They dated for two weeks. Though he was short, it was a very long relationship for Samantha.

Steve: You're the best woman I've ever met. And I wanted you to know that. I love you, Miranda. I really do.
Carrie(voiceover): Suddenly, Steve had just verbalized the one big pro that outweighed all the cons.

Carrie: I figured we made a good match. I was adept at fashion; he was adept at politics. And really, what's the difference? They're both about recycling shop-worn ideas and making them seem fresh and inspiring.

Carrie: Is there anything you want or need that I'm not doing?
Bill Kelley: No... well, maybe one thing.
Carrie: What?
Bill Kelley: Well, I would love to get you in the shower.
Carrie: Mmhmm.
Bill Kelley: And get each other all fresh and clean.
Carrie: Well that sounds nice.
Bill Kelley: And then...let you pee on me.

Miranda: I'm glad you three weren't around during the original thirteen colonies. I don't think our founding fathers were very fuckable.

Bill Kelley: Can I talk to you about proposition 114?
Carrie: What is that?
Bill Kelley: You and me in the bedroom.

Samantha: Look, sometimes for the right guy you have to make concessions. There's always gonna be something.
Carrie: Are you guys seriously advocating that I do this?
Samantha: Why not? He's a great looking, rich, political prince.
Carrie: Oh sure! It's practically a fairy tale, the princess and the pee.

Miranda: I would be very worried if I were you. The pee could just be foreplay.
Carrie: Oh, my God!
Miranda: Where there's smoke, I'm just saying....
Samantha: This is so typical of men in power. They just love to be dominated and humiliated.
Charlotte: What did you say when he asked you?
Carrie: Well I told him that I'd just gone, but maybe another time. But I really don't think that I can keep saying that forever.

Charlotte: I love that, one woman's trash is another woman's treasure.

Stanford: Who's that guy?
Carrie: Oh, that's his campaign manager.
Stanford: Fix me up.
Carrie: How do you even know he's gay?
Stanford: I've seen him roller blading on eighth avenue. That's enough.
Carrie: Great! Now, I'm a first lady and a pimp.

Stanford: I can only stay a few minutes. I've got tickets to the "Vagina Monologues."
Carrie: Why?
Stanford: Just because I don't eat at the restaurant, doesn't mean I can't hear the specials.

Miranda: Tell me again, why are we voting for this guy?
Carrie: Well, he's calling for an investigation into the Board of Education to weed out waste and fraud, and he's launched a probe against large corportations to make them stop throwing away your tax dollars. I'm sleeping with him.
Steve: Good enough for me.

Miranda: That's my problem. I don't know how to be political in relationships.
Carrie: Oh oh, it's time for the old list. Things you like about Steve, things you don't like about Steve, and you see which column is longer.
Miranda: That's so judgmental.
Carrie: Miranda, you are judgmental. Why don't you put it to good use?