Sir Bernard's Stately Homes Season 1 Episode 5

Sir Bernard's Quotes

"Listen Busby, can't you see my friend here is handycapped?"
"Yeah. That's still £28 though"

"How much is that together then?"
*long pause while they both stare into space*
"Not enough"

"We're doing a documentary!"
"About two cubs, and their adventures and japes and shit."

"We can't wait to see the antiques and shit."

"What did they look like?"
"Like men dressed as cubs"

"What a lot of badges you've got! What are they all for?"
"Right, this is for starting a fire, this is for pushing a lady across the road, this I...
Kissing a chair... this is something to do with beef."

"Yes yes yes... Thank you penfold!"

"Tony was that really necessary?"
"Yeah. The darkness. The voices. Telling me to do things."

"How do you tie a reef knot?"
"F**k off!"
"Arcaila? Do you know what your cub scouts just said?"
"F**k off!"
"Yes! Exactly!"