B.J. Cummings: Is it a boy or a girl?
Notch Johnson: B.J., I'm not a doctor.
Notch Johnson (after talking to the President): Well, ya gotta love Bush!
Ellen Von Dyke: I know I do!
Porcelain Bidet: I don't wanna become some kind of a bag lady.
Chappy: Pity. You sure got the bags for it!
Notch Johnson: You gotta help me, I need a place to hide, Aunt Jizzy.
Aunt Jizzy: Notch, you can hide behind my back porch. It's plenty big!
Aunt Jizzy: Come on everybody! It's time to eat Aunt Jizzy out...of house and home!
International Episode Titles:
Czech Republic: Špatné zprávy, pane Johnsone (Bad News, Mr. Johnson).