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Voice of Stan Marsh; Eric Theodore Cartman; Herbert Garrison; Officer Barbrady; Terrance; Timmy; Ned Gerblanski; Satan; Randy Ma
Voice of Kyle Broflovski; Kenny McKormick; Gerald Broflovski; Pip Pirrup; Jesus; Jimbo Kearn; Phillip; Saddam; Various Others
Voice of Jerome "Chef" McElroy
In the beginning, there are 16 children in the karate class. But after the end of the class, only 13 were seen leaving.
"Randy, you are powerless to make that decision." - an adaptation of the Christian teaching that one is powerless against sin without God in his life.
Cartman is wearing a WWII-era Japanese flag as a headband - a reference to the Japanese attack on Pearl Harbor on December 7, 1941, which prompted the US entry into World War II.
We learn that Stan Kyle and Cartman take a Karate class.
When Stan says he's led a cult once, he's refering to the episode Trapped In The Closet when he breifly led the Scientologists.
When Randy asks Stan to drive him to the statue, Stan says he's 8; however, in season 4 and beyond he said he was 9. How can that be?
When Randy gets in his car to go see the bleeding statue and starts talking to Stan. After Stan shouts "What!?" if you look in the rear driver side window of Randy's car you can see a faint image of a visitor from "Cartman Gets an Anal Probe."
Man: I was diagnosed with brain cancer two months ago. I feel like this is my only hope.
Randy: I know exactly how you feel. I've got alcoholism.
Stan: Dad, you can't drive, your license is suspended, remember? If you get pulled over again, you're gonna go to jail for ten years!
Randy: Alright.....Then you drive.
Stan: I'm eight!
Randy: This is my only hope Stan! Either you drive this car or I will!
Michael: Young man, do you know anything about the 12 Step Program?
Stan: Yea! And I also know a thing or two about cults. I was the leader of one for a while.
(Stan is kicked out of the building)
(Stan walks into A.A. meeting)
Stan: Excuse me, who's in charge here?
Michael: None of us are in charge. We're all powerless.
(Group murmurs in agreement)
Stan: Look, my dad was here yesterday, and you all kinda messed him up by telling him he had a disease.
Man: Alcoholism is a disease.
Stan: No its not, and you can't just go around saying stuff like that to people like my dad. He's kinda a hypochondriac.
Reporter: The statue of the Virgin Mary has started to bleed.......Out its ass.
Man at A.A. Meeting: My name's Bill, and I'm an alcoholic.
Group: Hi Bill.
Bill: I've been using the 12 Step Program for about two months now and I'm really turning my life around! No more blowing guys on Colfax Avenue for a pint of vodka for this cowboy!
(The group claps)
Cartman: You know Stan, I'd say that your dad racks-a-disaprin.
Officer: I want you to hold your arms out at your sides.
Randy: (holding arms out) There! I did it! See, no problem.
Officer: And now touch your finger to your nose.
Randy: Do what?
Officer: Touch your finger to your nose.
Randy: Oh come on! That's impossible!
Officer: (demonstrating) Just bring one hand to your nose like this.
Randy: (drunkenly) Ok, ok hang on. Hang...Hang on.
(Randy stumbles all over the place trying to touch his nose. His pants start falling down.)
Randy: (driving) I gotta pee, hand me that empty bottle Stan.
Stan: Why don't you just pull over?
Randy: Stan, you need to learn some things about being a man, now give me that bottle.
(Stan gives Randy the bottle)
Randy: (unzipping his pants) There's a reason God made our penises like little hoses boys.
Randy: (tipsy) C'mon, I'll drive you boys home.
Kyle: Are you sure you're alright?
Randy: Yea I'll be fine. I got some beers to keep my buzz going.
Stan: Dad, you like to drink, so have a drink once in a while. Have two! If you devote your whole life to completely avoiding something you like, then that thing still controls your life and... and you've never learned any discipline at all.
Randy: But, maybe I'm just the kind of person who needs to have it all or nothing.
Stan: No. All or nothing is easy. But learning to drink a little bit, responsibly? That's a-disiprin. Disirpin come from within.
Randy: How did I manage to raise such a smart kid?
Stan: I've had a great teacher.
Randy: Thanks, son.
Stan: No, not you. My karate teacher. He's really smart.
Randy: Uh, my name's Randy, and I just really like beer.
Bearded Man: You have to admit you're an alcoholic.
Randy: But... I don't know if I'm really an alcoholic.
Obese Woman: Then why are you here?
Randy: Because I got a DUI, and so I'm required to attend AA meetings for two weeks. I was stupid one night and drank too much and then drove a car. That was dumb and I'm not gonna do it again.
Michael: Randy, you are powerless to make that decision. The only thing that works is the 12-Step Program. Step 1 is admitting that you are powerless to control your drinking. Only then can you move on to the other 12 steps, like believing that only a higher power, God, makes you stop drinking, and then turning your life over to that God, and humbly asking God to remove your weaknesses.
Randy: Wait, wait, wait, hold on. I never knew that Alcoholics Anonymous was a religious thing.
Michael: It's not religious; you just have to admit that there's some kind of god which has power over you and turn your life over to that god and ask him for forgiveness. That's the 12-Step Program, not religion.
Randy: Look, I... I just really need to cut down on my drinking and never drive a car drunk again.
Michael: You can't just cut down on your drinking, Randy. You need to know something. You have a disease.
Randy: A... a disease?
Michael: That's right. Alcoholism is a disease. You're sick, Randy. You're very, very sick. And just like with most diseases, you can't cure it yourself. And it's deadly.
Randy: (with sheer terror) Oh my god.
Randy: Well, uh, I'm supposed to tell you kids about how bad drinking is. I did a little drinking and driving and, as part of my punishment, I'm doing community service work at schools like these.
Mrs. Garrison: Oh, that's very interesting, isn't it kids?
Randy: Uh, you shouldn't drink because it leads to bad things. I was in jail for the night, and, well, I guess, I don't know, I... Just don't drink. But if you must drink, definitely don't drive. I've definitely learned that first hand. That's all, I guess.
Mrs. Garrison: Well, I think we've all learned an important lesson, haven't we class? If you don't make the right choices in life, you could end up being a big loser, like Stan's dad. Drinking and driving is for idiots! Nobody wants to end up like Stan's dad, do they? I want you all to take a good look at Stan's dad and say, 'Is that who I wanna be in 30 years? Getting tickets and having to go to elementary school classrooms and talk about how pathetic I am?' Thank you, Mr. Marsh. I think you made your point.
Stan: Dad, aren't you supposed to like not drink and drive?
Randy: I'm not drinking and driving, I'm driving while I'm drinking. Right boys!?!
(At karate school.)
Cartman: Uts bum sa!
Cartman: Uts bum sa KYA!
Instructor: Cartman, what are you doing?
Cartman: I'm doing some sweet bum sa moves. I'm a little better than everyone else here.
Instructor: Eric-son, you must follow direction. You rack disiprin.
Cartman: Nuh-uh, I don't rack-a-disiprin!
Kyle: Dude we gotta hurry home, the final episode of Lost is on soon.
Randy: I know how to deal.
Officer: License and registration please.
Randy: What seems to be the officer, problem?
Officer: Sir, why don't you step out of the car for me.
Reporter: And the Pope (Benedict XVI) said quote 'A chick bleeding out her vagina is no miracle. Chicks bleed out their vaginas all the time.'
This is the first episode in which the Pope is not John Paul II. The Pope is now Benedict XVI.
This episode aired again on August 2, 2006, after being shelved eight months ago after its first airing, due to it being offensive to some Roman Catholics.
This is the first season to air all its episodes in production order.
Kenny does not appear in this episode.
The Catholic League (for Religious and Civil Rights) has petitioned for Comedy Central, MTV, and Viacom to formally apologize to the Roman Catholic community and to "permanently retire" this episode and not release it on DVD. Sort of ironic because they seem to want to deny freedom of speech.
Kyle and Stan talk about watching the final episode of the hit ABC show, Lost.
Current Event/Statue of Bleeding Mary:
About a week ago, a church in California had a statue of Virgin Mary. People saw from the statue that the statue was crying, and the tears she was crying were blood.
This title of this episode is also the name of the drink of made made from vodka, tomato juice and a few other minor ingredients.
Also, since the episode is using it for a belief, it could also be related to the urban legend of "Bloody Mary" where, when said 3 times in front of a mirror, a vengeful spirit appears and kills the summoner.
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