Kyle's diabetes has now affected his kidneys, and he desperately needs a transplant. His mother, however, has gotten into a local fad: holistic medicine. Of course, the herbs and roots aren't working, and only Stan seems to understand Kyle's needs. The doctor tells him that only Cartman has a matching kidney for Kyle, but when Stan goes to ask him, Cartman demands $10,000,000. Instead, Stan hatches a scheme to get Cartman's kidney.moreless
Voice of Stan Marsh; Eric Theodore Cartman; Herbert Garrison; Officer Barbrady; Terrance; Timmy; Ned Gerblanski; Satan; Randy Ma
Voice of Kyle Broflovski; Kenny McKormick; Gerald Broflovski; Pip Pirrup; Jesus; Jimbo Kearn; Phillip; Saddam; Various Others
Voice of Jerome "Chef" McElroy
Voice of Mayor McDaniels; Liane Cartman; Mrs. McKormick; Wendy Testaburger; Shelly Marsh; Sharon Marsh; Various Others
Voice of Sheila Broflovski; Linda Stotch; Various Others
Voice of Miss Information
Voice of Chief Running Pinto
Voice of Carlos Ramirez
Voice of Mr. Wyland
Visitor Sighting: On the bulletin board in Mr. Garrison's classroom, there is a drawing of a visitor hanging up; it is captioned, "Carl."
When Mr. Garrison is typing his erotic novel (second scene), his keyboard is backwards. The number pad and enter key are on the wrong side.
Cartman's pig, Fluffy, is seen for the first time since "An Elephant Makes Love To a Pig".
When Kenny dies in this episode, no one says "Oh my God they killed Kenny!" or "You bastards!"
Stan: Kenny, you stay there and guard his mom's door with Timmy.
Timmy: (Quieter) Timmy
(Stan and Kyle are at Cartman's house convincing Cartman to donate one of his kidney's to Kyle)
Stan: Dude, one of your friends are gonna die! Don't you see how serious this is?
Kenny(muffles): It's not that f**king serious!
Kyle: Coughs twice
Cartman: Well, perhaps I can see a way for giving up kidney… for a price!
Stan: Oh my god!
Kyle: How much?
Cartman: I don't know, how much is your life worth to you, Kyle?
Stan: Cartman, you are SO going to hell when you die!
Cartman: Yes, well until then. I need about $10 million dollars.
Kenny(muffles): $10 MILLION DOLLARS?!?!?
Stan: What the hell will you do with $10 million dollars, fat ass?
Cartman: What I attend to do with the money isn't an issue is it? I suggest you start looking for that money quickly, Kyle doesn't seem have much time. Tick Tock Tick Tock.
Stan: C'mon Kyle! Let's get out of here!
Cartman: Ok, where were we Kenny? Oh yeah! Quick, Captain, we must destroy the engine of agent 5! Give me the space cruiser!
Cartman starts to grab the Space Cruiser out of Kenny's hands. Kenny starts to tug it back to him
Cartman: Give it Kenny meeh!
Miss Information: Holistic medicine is about nature! (To Sheila) That will be $233.
Stan: You suck Cartman!
Cartman: Maybe so, but at least I was smart enough to a wear Kidney Blocker 2000!
Stan: Careful Cartman, you might pop your stitches.
Get Well Soon, Kyle Song:
Butters: (singing) We're so sorry you're not feeling well.
We hope you're better soon.
So we're bringing you some sunshine
By, um, singing you this tune:
Everybody misses you
And though we hate to cause a fuss
We'd like to say, "Get well soon!"
And "Please don't die on us."
Mrs. Cartman: Don't get too close to Kyle; it looks like he might have the AIDS.
Mr. Mackey: What do you love most?
Mr. Garrison: Besides teaching?
Mr. Mackey: Yes
Mr. Garrison: Poon tang
Mr. Mackey: Mmkay.
Mr. Garrison: I can't help it. I'm a womanizer sometimes I know but I just think that bringing a woman home and getting some hot poon is about the greatest thing in the world.
Mr. Mackey: Well that settles it Mr. Garrison, what you need to do is go write a great romance novel!
Principal Victoria: Mr. Garrison, last week's charges of trying to solicit sex from a minor...
Mr. Garrison: That was not me! That was Mr. Hat!
(Kids decorate Butters instead of card)
Stan: Now that's a get-well card!
Kenny: You never f**king care when I die!
Stan: (after seeing that Cartman is the only eligible donor) Oh, sh*t.
Cartman: (speaking in his dream) HIPPIES,… HIII-PPIIIES ALL AROUND ME… they want to save the world but all they do is smoke pot and smell bad!
Mr. Garrison: Very well, I suppose you'll be wanting my badge and gun.
School Board member: Mr. Garrison, MOST teachers DO NOT carry a gun!
Mr. Garrison: Oh, so I can keep it then?
Mr. Wyland: (speaking to Cartman) Kenny, you come and decorate the get-well card too.
Cartman: But I don't want Kyle to get well, I hate Kyle.
What Kenny says:
1) Kenny says "Here" when the sub. teacher says "Is Stan Marsh here?"
2) When Cartman and Kenny are playing Kenny makes swooching and shooting noises.
3) When Cartman and Kenny are fighting over the space cruiser Kenny says "No it's mine!"
4) When Stan says that Kyle dying is really serious, Kenny says "It's not that f(beep)king serious!"
5) When Cartman says that he wants 10 million dollars Kenny replies with "10 million dollars!?!"
6) Kenny says "I know." when Stan says that he doesn't know what to do.
7) Kenny says "Uh-huh." when Stan says that if Kyle died they'd never see him again.
8) Kenny says "Uh-huh." when Stan asks if that was it for people.
9) Kenny says "You never f(beep)king care when I die!" when Stan is talking about Kyle dying.
10) Right after Stan starts crying, Kenny says "Now that does it, I've had enough of this bullsh(beep)t! Screw you guys, I'm going home!"
(while writing his "Great American Romance Novel")
Mr. Garrison: Diana ran her hand across Rebecca's stomach. It felt good, like a penis. As Rebecca lay there, she felt as though she were surrounded by penises, a whole forest of them, all just flopping around her and smacking her face, (see Mr. Hat going down off the scene, and, evidently, into Mr. Garrison's pants) OH! OH MR. HAT! WHAT ON EARTH ARE YOU DOING!
(while writing his "Great American Romance Novel")
Mr. Garrison: "Out on the balcony, when Reginald kissed Diana lips, her knees went weak. Slowly, he pulled her top down exposing her soft, unyielding breasts." Oh, yeah! Now this is getting good! "Just the
sight of those breasts made Reginald's penis very hard. His penis was of considerable size, and now beads of sweat ran slowly down his penis, making it glisten like a strong swimmer fresh from out of the pool. It was a fantastic penis that seemed as strong as a horse's leg, yet as delecate as a flower wrapped in silk. What a grand, grand penis! Diana's nipples..." Uh, let's see! "Diana's nipples..." OH, WRITER'S BLOCK! WRITER'S BLOCK! Hm! CRAP! I'm stuck! Oh, well! Maybe that's enough writing for tonight, Mr. Hat!
Stan: Cartman, could you donate one of your kidneys to Kyle?
Cartman: (About a millisecond after Stan finishes; singing and dancing) No no no no no, no no no no no, no no no no no no no, no no no no no!
Cartman: Oh good, you got the crappy kidney.
Sharon: Hey Stan, I bought you more of that all natural toothpaste.
Stan: You mean that stuff that's taste like ass and doesn't fight cavities?
Cartman: SHUT UP FLUFFY!
Stan: Kyle's gonna die Kenny, (starts crying) Herbal medicine is going to kill my best friend...
Kenny: (mumbled) That's it I'm sick of this bull sh** screw you guys, I'm goin' home!
Carlos Ramirez: Yeah, you too and junk.
(Kenny comes through with Timmy and Butters)
Stan:This is it? This is everyone that wanted to help Kyle?
Butters: Well Clyde was gonna come too, but h-he said his mom was making tacos for dinner and Clyde likes tacos a whole lot.
Carlos Ramirez and Chief Running Pinto: Let the mysterious ways of our people show you a new way of tampons!
First time in years where Cheech Marin (Voice of Carlos Ramirez) and Tommy Chong (Voice of Chief Running Pinto) worked in acting together.
Cartman and Kyle have blood type AB Negative.
The school board mentions Mr. Garrisons conduct and recent charges of soliciting sex from a minor. This most likely stems from the episode before this one, Cartman joins NAMBLA, where Mr. Garrison sets up a meeting with Cartman on the internet, supposedly by mistake.
This is the first time Kyle nearly dies due to an illness, but recovers after Cartman`s misfortune.
The episode features the second ever live action commercial on South Park. The advertisement is for "Cherokee Hair Tampons."
That Cartman answers for Kenny sets up a joke only people who've seen the "The Spirit of Christmas (Jesus vs. Frosty)" will recognize.
In a commercial for this episode when Stan asks what Cartman would do with $10 million he replies that he would make Britney Spears his sex slave. When the episode actually aired, he says it doesn't matter what he plans to do with the money.
This is an allusion to the romance literature genre: Harlequin Enterprises which is an publishing house dedicated to romance fiction novels for women.
A Funny Thing Happened On The Way to Forum:
Cartman sings a song consisting solely the word "no". This song is in the tune of "Comedy Tonight!" a song from the 1962 Broadway musical by Stephen Sondheim "A Funny Thing Happened on the Way to Forum".
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