South Park

Season 8 Episode 8

Douche and Turd

Aired Wednesday 10:00 PM Oct 27, 2004 on Comedy Central
out of 10
User Rating
386 votes

By Users

Episode Summary

Kyle and Cartman are fighting about who would make a better school mascot, now that the South Park Cows are considered offensive by PETA. Kyle thinks it should be a Giant Douche, while Cartman believes it should be a Turd Sandwich. Stan on the other hand, could care less, and refuses to participate in the vote.moreless

Who was the Episode MVP ?

No results found.
  • Bush Will Be Pissed.

    I Like South Park. I Like It's Secret Education (The Condom Episode). But This. This Episode. It Broke Every Single Law Of Voting. If You Do Not Vote, You Go To Jail. However, This Episode Takes The Laws And Draws Them To Drastic Matters. Matters That Hurt Bush'S Matters. Anyway, This Episode Says That If You Don't Vote, A Famous Rap Group Will Kill You. That's Just Another Way Of Picking On The Africn-Americans.

    Later In The Episode, Stan Marsh Is Banned And Kicked Out Of South Park. You'd Think They'd Just Tell Him To Leave. You're WRONG. He Is Mocked On, Spitted On, The People Rip Off His Clothes, And Finally, A Bucket Is Put On His Head, And He Is Put On A Horse, Which At One Point, P.E.T.A Dumps Blood On Him Because They Think He Used The Horse Himself, When The Un-Thinkible Mayor Did It.

    Where Is The FCC?moreless
  • perfect

    The South Park school mascot, the cows, is considered offensive by PETA, so they must vote for a new one. Kyle comes up with an idea; a giant douche. But Cartman thinks a turd sandwich would be better. Everyone at school needs to vote, but Stan doesn't feel the need to. Who will Stan vote for anyway? And more importantly, who will win?

    I liked this episode, it was really funny and a pretty simple plot. And the ending, when Stan's vote pretty much does not count, and him mentioning this, was funny. So my final grade for this episode is of course, an A+moreless
  • average

    when the peta forces south park elementary to change a mascot , the choices are giant douche and turd sandwhich. stan feels that voting on this specific thing is stupid. the rest of south park is appalled and leave stan in exile , where he is forced to live with the peta. overall,not a bad episodehowever 3 things i found were very stupid.

    1)the name doesn't have the charm south park contributes to thier episode titles.

    2)the thing where puff daddy threatens stan to vote was very odd.

    3. the peta marrying and having children with animals a bit too disturbing.

    the restt , im cool with :Dmoreless
  • It's always between a douche and a turd...

    This episode was a brilliant satire of the 2004 election between Kerry [the douche] and Bush [the turd] [NOTE: That is what I think they meant] and with the brilliant message, everyone you will vote for, is a turd. Also great jokes on PETA, the election, Zoophillia, Puff Daddy's "Vote or Die" Campaign, this episode was damn funny, and since I used 58 words already, let me just say, go to the quotes secttion and read those 2 songs, they rule!.moreless
  • This satirical attack on the failings of democracy should be compulsory viewing.

    This is one of my favorite episodes because, like Stan, I am often criticized for not voting. Contrary to the notes on this site which claim the lesson learned is that “voting allows you to pick the lesser of two evils”, the real moral of the story is that there is no point in voting AT ALL if your choice is between a douche and a turd. And as Balding Man says “Nearly every election since the beginning of time has been between some douche and some turd. They\'re the only people who suck up enough to make it that far in politics.” I would add that if people would stop voting for douches and turds that there might be less of both in politics. Oh well.moreless
Trey Parker

Trey Parker

Voice of Stan Marsh; Eric Theodore Cartman; Herbert Garrison; Officer Barbrady; Terrance; Timmy; Ned Gerblanski; Satan; Randy Ma

Matt Stone

Matt Stone

Voice of Kyle Broflovski; Kenny McKormick; Gerald Broflovski; Pip Pirrup; Jesus; Jimbo Kearn; Phillip; Saddam; Various Others

Isaac Hayes

Isaac Hayes

Voice of Jerome "Chef" McElroy

Mona Marshall

Mona Marshall

Voice of Sheila Broflovski; Linda Stotch; Various Others

Gracie Lazar

Gracie Lazar

Voice of Liane Cartman; Wendy Testaburger; Shelly Marsh; Sharon Marsh; Various Others

Trivia, Notes, Quotes and Allusions


  • TRIVIA (3)

  • QUOTES (13)

    • Male PETA Member: Get off him you filthy human!
      Female PETA Member: (comforting the horse Stan was riding) Poor thing needs water. (to Stan) Shame on you for making this horse your slave!
      (Stan gets covered in red paint by a PETA member)

    • Balding PETA member: Stan, I want to introduce you to my stepdaughter, Teresa. (the camera pans down to show a lamb with small horns) She seems to have taken a liking to you. (suggestively) And she's ovulating.

    • Butters: Turd Sandwich is not only the first turd to be nominated school mascot, but also the first sandwich.

    • Mr. Garrison: Since our school has been attacked by eco-terrorists for the 47th time...

    • PETA member: Gary and Sally here have just managed to have a child together.
      Ostrich-human child thing: Kill…me.

    • End Song:
      Let's get out and vote!
      Let's make our voices heard!
      We've been given the right to choose
      Between a douche and a turd
      It's democracy in action,
      Put your freedom to the test,
      A big fat turd or a stupid douche,
      Which do you like best?

    • Puff Daddy: I thought I told you vote or die, BITCH!

    • Cartman: Butterscotch candy?

    • Kyle: Kenny what's funnier giant douche or a turd sandwich?
      Kenny: Giant douche.
      Cartman: Awww you're just saying that because I broke your cat's leg last week!

    • Stan: So my vote didn't matter after all?
      Randy: Hey, don't you think that.
      Mr. Garrison: Hey everyone! All the PETA members are dead!
      Mr. Mackey: Why that means...
      Clyde: We can go back to being the Cows! (reveals Cows shirt)
      (everyone cheers)
      Randy: (to Stan) Okay, now your vote doesn't matter.

    • Puff Daddy: Haven't you heard of my campaign 'Vote or Die'?
      Stan: What does that mean, anyway?
      (Puff Daddy and his posse pull their guns on Stan)
      Puff Daddy: What you think it means!

    • Puff Daddy: Vote or Die.
      Stan: Yeah I've been meaning to ask you what's that mean anyways?
      Puff Daddy: What the f*** you think it means? (Points gun at Stan.)

    • Puff Daddy: Vote Or Die!

      Vote Or Die, mutha F***, mutha f***, Vote Or Die!

      Rock the vote or else
      I'm gonna stick a knife through your eye
      Democracy is founded on one simple rule
      Get out there and vote or I'm a mutha f****** kill you (yeah)

      I like it when you vote bitch,
      Shake them t***ies when you vote bitch.
      I'll shove my jimmy through your mouth roof,
      Now get your big ass in the polling booth.

      I said vote bitch,
      or I'ma gonna mutha f****** kill you

      Vote or Die, mutha f***, mutha f***, Vote Or Die

      Can't run from a .38, go ahead and try
      let your opinion be heard,
      you gotta make a choice
      Cuz after I slit your throat,
      you won't have a f****** voice

      Vote Or Die, Vote Or Die!

  • NOTES (3)

    • This is the second episode to air during Halloween time, yet in no way be related to Halloween. The first was Christian Hard Rock.

    • Along with the debut of Drawn Together, this episode was aired during Game 4 of the 2004 World Series between the Boston Red Sox and St. Louis Cardinals, airing more than an hour and a 1/2 before the last out was made.

    • The episode order of the run was cut short by one when Paramount rushed Matt and Trey's marionette, political Bruckheimer parody "Team America: World Police" into theaters hopefully before election day. As a result, Matt and Trey were on "promotional duty" and had no time to go back to work in time for an episode on Oct. 20th, so season eight ended up at fourteen episodes (akin to season 5) rather than the planned fifteen.


    • When Stan meets PETA members Gary and Sally, their child says, "Kill me" in a strained voice. This is an allusion to the episode "Towelie," after the boys enter the military base, they find a deformed towel that says the same thing.

    • People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals (PETA):

      Is an animal rights organization based in the states, and the most famous in the world against the unethical and inhumane acts towards Animals. They are famous for pouring dye on people wearing or using Fur for fashion related acts.

    • The Country of the Blind

      Stan's journey of discovery in the mountains bears some resemblance to this classic short story by H.G. Wells. In that tale a lost Alpine climber finds a hidden advanced civilization where snow-blindness has eventually led to babies being born without eyes. The residents at first welcome the newcomer, but want him to have his eyes removed and become like them in order to be permitted to stay in their society. Even after falling in love with a local woman, the climber cannot bear to give up his sight and he leaves the society behind.

    • Vote Or Die:

      P. Diddy's voting slogan, which was used in this episode.

    • Bush/Kerry Election:

      Most of the election part of this episode is somewhat a parody of the Bush and Kerry election.

    • Alien Resurrection:

      The Man-Ostrich Hybrid asking for death is similar to the line that was spoken in the 1997 film Alien Resurrection.

      When one of Lt. Ripley's clones finds another failed clone lying on a lab table begging to be put out of its misery. A reference to this scene was also said in the episode "Towelie".

    • Transformers:

      The name Puff Daddy yells out after he gets sprayed with blood from the P.E.T.A protester is the same (or close enough) to the Decepticon Combiner: Bruticus: a Transformers from the old Transformers G1 cartoons.

    • Mad Max Beyond Thunderdome:

      The scene where Stan is ridden out of town on the back of a horse is similar to the sequence in the 1985 film Mad Max Beyond Thunderdome where Max is given the punishment of "Gulag."

    • Star Trek / 47:

      Mr. Garrison says the school's been attacked 47 times by eco-terrorists.(see Quotes)

      This is another Star Trek reference. The number 47 shows up over and over in ST:TNG, DS9 and Voyager, as it was a script-writer's favourite number.

      Eventually many ST writers wrote it into their scripts. Matt and Trey seem to be big Star Trek fans, and this is another homage to ST.