South Park

Season 10 Episode 10

Miss Teacher Bangs a Boy

Aired Wednesday 10:00 PM Oct 18, 2006 on Comedy Central
out of 10
User Rating
606 votes

By Users

Episode Summary

Cartman, South Park Elementary’s new hallway monitor, takes it personally when he finds out that a teacher has been kissing a student in his jurisdiction. He helps Kyle stop his little brother’s affair with his “Nice” hot teacher.

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  • Funny

    This was a very funny episode, and you didn't have to even know the parody of the original dog to know it was funny. Cartman gets a crew up and actually helps Kyle to get his brother back from a teacher who Ike and the teacher are in love. Cartman makes a theme song and tracks her down since she was in Cartman's halls and against the school policy, with no hall passmoreless
  • Humurous, but not funny

    The actual \"Dog the bounty hunter\" rib was funny, and comical as Cartman continued to tell his offenders to \"go with christ, bro.\" For anyone who has seen a couple of the \"Dog\" shows, then you would understand.

    As for the main plot, I realize that the sex/teacher scandals seem to be in the news, but... I just didn\'t enjoy this one as much. The only time I laughed at this plot was when the music sequence hit... but not because of the dialog. I can\'t rate this show horrible, due to Butters bathroom incident, but it wasn\'t a stand out episode either.moreless
  • Eric Cartman is....THE DAWG!.......

    This episode is to correspon the adualts having sex withy clidren thing that was going around at the time. And how everyone acted bad to men, but not to woman. So let's take a look

    Story- Upon coming the hall monitar, Cartman patrolls the halls 24 seven. When he spots some garbage in the halls, he brings it back to thje kindergarden. It turns out that Ike has a crush on the teacher, and at the end of class, the teacher does too. so she brings ike home and has sex with him, but calls it tutoring to disguise it to his parents Kyle, upon hearing this, tells the polise, but they don't care, in that matter of fact, they all go nice in a sleek way.the endings very bizarre.

    good-the whole episode is great!!!

    bad- can't find anything bad bouts it.

    bottom line: if you're looking for a great song, child sex, and cos saying nice in a sleek way? then chek this out.moreless
  • Soo Funny!!

    This episode is so funny i was laughing soo hard.. Its one of the most funniest episodes on South Park!! The episode is about when ike is in love with Ms. Stephenson, the kindergarten teacher and he draws pictures of her and when she found out she explains to ike that there have been "teachers on the news lately who have been having relationships with young male students." but then, she admits she loves him as well. LOL its really funny.. and ive heard that this episode is a parody of the Debra Lafave teacher-pupil sex scandal, and the Dog the Bounty Hunter TV series.moreless
  • Police say that a very young boy making love to a Hot teacher is nice.....

    I love it!I love it!I love it!I love it!I love it!I love it!I love it!I love it!I love it!I love it!I love it!I love it!I love it!

    This is the first time I saw Ike to have his own plot, good for him, but I'm not satisfied with his loss of virginity, although a kinder gardener having a relationship with his teacher is genius, not like the ones you see at the news.

    Cartman being the hall monitor, pretty cool, love the fact that it's a spoof of Duanne Chapman. Although I wish the quote "Respect my Authoritatah" was back.

    The way they animate Beth was really funny, she has giant boobs. Kenny would definitely love her.moreless
Trey Parker

Trey Parker

Voice of Stan Marsh; Eric Theodore Cartman; Herbert Garrison; Officer Barbrady; Terrance; Timmy; Ned Gerblanski; Satan; Randy Ma

Matt Stone

Matt Stone

Voice of Kyle Broflovski; Kenny McKormick; Gerald Broflovski; Pip Pirrup; Jesus; Jimbo Kearn; Phillip; Saddam; Various Others

Mona Marshall

Mona Marshall

Voice of Sheila Broflovski; Linda Stotch; Various Others

Katharine Howell

Katharine Howell

Ms. Stevenson

Guest Star

April Stewart

April Stewart

Principal Victoria

Recurring Role

Jessie Thomas

Jessie Thomas

Voice of Unknown

Recurring Role

Trivia, Notes, Quotes and Allusions


  • TRIVIA (17)

    • Cartman catches Ike and his teacher making out in the hallway during class and turned them into the office. However, Cartman should have also been in class.

    • The song used in the montage where Ms. Stevenson and Ike are dating is Can't Fight This Feeling Anymore by REO Speedwagon.

    • Ike is the second boy (Jimmy was the first) to lose his virginity. Cartman also claims that he's had sex before in "Erection Day".

      Edit: Actually he's the third. Kenny was the first one to lose his virginity in the S04E15 episode "Fat Camp" when he performed oral sex on Howard Stern.

    • This is one of the few times Cartman doesn't demand something in return, ESPECIALLY from Kyle.

    • If you look carefully, you'll see Stan in the halls, then when Cartman turns around, its another kid.

    • In Duane 'Dog' Chapman's book, You Can Run But You Can't Hide, he states that South Park portrayed Beth perfectly and that the whole family laughed while watching this episode.

    • When Cartman pushes the kid against the lockers, the kid has the same voice as Kelly when he says: "Hey you can't push me against... ahhhh"

    • This is the third time that Cartman has had authority of any kind.

    • When they are on the roof, in one shot the door is open and in the next it's closed.

    • In the scene where Cartman and his crew park the SUV outside behind an orange car, in the next shot when Cartman and his crew are running in, the SUV is gone, only to return in the next scene.

    • When Cartman is sent to the office at the beginning of the episode by a hall monitor (a red haired kid with freckles), he calls the kid a "ginger Jew rat". This is referencing the season 9 episode "Ginger Kids".

    • Ike pronounces the city Milan similar to the Disney film "Mulan," which implies he doesn't know the difference.

    • Randy shifts his eyes after saying "yeah, she's a victim" refers to the episode "Bloody Mary" where he becomes a "victim" of alcoholism.

    • Randy Marsh is seen wearing a purple shirt in this episode. Randy almost ALWAYS wears his blue shirt.

    • Kyle asked his mom to talk to Ike about love and sex. Ike had already learned about this in "Proper Condom Use".

    • Trey Parker has said that Dog the Bounty Hunter is one of his favorite shows.

    • In this episode, Cartman knocks Mel Gibson when he says that Miss Stevenson is "using the 'Mel Gibson' defense" when she says that she is an alcoholic. However, in "The Passion of the Jew," Cartman idolizes Mel Gibson.

      Response: It's true that in the beginning of that episode, Cartman idolizes Mel Gibson, but in the end when Gibson acts insane, Cartman can't believe this is the guy he idolized and we're to assume Cartman doesn't like Mel Gibson anymore.

  • QUOTES (35)

    • Cartman: (singing) I have some bada$$ got to help me, I only have to pay them 50 bucks, you think you can get away without having a hall pass, you won't get away from me 'cause I'm the Dawg, I am the Dawg, the big bad Dawg, you think you can get away without having a hall pass? Think Again!

    • Cartman: Hall Infraction!!!
      Ms. Stevenson: Oh, ahhh, we were just heading back in.
      Cartman: You got a hall pass, brah?
      Ms. Stevenson: I don't need a hall pass, I'm the teacher.
      Cartman: Yeah, but where is his hall pass?
      Ms. Stevenson: Look, just let us back in.
      Cartman: Get down on the floor!!!
      Ms. Stevenson: We're going back inside
      Cartman: You like bear-maze, ice-head?
      Ms. Stevenson: Bear-maze?
      Cartman: Your going with Christ!!!
      Ms. Stevenson: Ahhhhhh!!!!!!

    • Cartman: Look, brah, I had to bring you in, but I don't have any hard feelings against you, alright?
      Butters: Huh?
      Cartman: Here. You need a smoke, brah?
      Butters: Oh... Okay.
      (Cartman lights a cigarette for Butters)
      Cartman: You gotta give yourself over to Christ, brah.
      Butters: I do? (Coughing)
      Cartman: Jesus is Lord. You can go one direction in life, where you can just walk around hallways without a hall pass, or you can see the light, brah.

    • Kyle: Ex- Excuse me? My name is... Brad. And I need to report a crime. Anonymously.
      Detective 1: Oh? What's the crime?
      Kyle: Well, I attend South Park Elementary. And- And one of the teachers is having sex with a student.
      Cops: Oh my god! This is terrible.
      Detective 1: You did the right thing telling the police, Brad. Now who's the teacher? What's his name?
      Kyle: Well, it isn't a guy teacher. It's a woman?
      Cop 1: A woman?
      Kyle: Yeah. She's having sex with a boy.
      Detective 2: Oh. But- But she's ugly, right?
      Kyle: Well, no, not really. It's the kindergarten teacher, Miss Stevenson.
      Detective 1: The blonde?
      Kyle: Yeah.
      Cop 1: Some young boy's having sex with Miss Stevenson?
      Kyle: Yes.
      Cop 1: Nice.
      Detective 1: Nice.
      Kyle: What?! No, you don't understand!
      Cop 1: You sure they've had sex?
      Kyle: Yeah!
      Cop 2: Has she performed oral sex on him?
      Kyle: Yeah, I think so.
      Cop 2: Nice.
      Cop 1: Nice.
      Cop 2: Nice.
      Detective 1: So, wait. What's the crime?
      Cop 1: The crime is, she isn't doin' it with me!
      Kyle: Hey! He's totally underage! She's taking advantage of him!
      Detective 1: You're right, we're sorry. This is serious. We need to track this student down, and give him his Luckiest Boy in America medal right away.
      Kyle: Aagh!

    • Cartman: Everyone get a good look at our fugitive. I wan't her taken down fast and clean.
      Leeroy: She ran away, now she got to deal with the Dawg, huh?

    • Lt. Dawson: Are you sure you're not lying Foley?
      Officer Foley: No really, I shot both of them. They weren't even doing nothing.

    • Kyle: Ike, I didn't tell on you. You got busted by the hallway monitor. (Ike just looks at Kyle) Okay, I did have something to do with it, but someday you're going to realize it was for the best.
      Ike: You are dead to me.
      Kyle: What?
      Ike: I said, you're dead to me.
      Kyle: I'm dead to you?
      Ike: You're dead to me Kyle.

    • Kyle: Wow! I think I owe you one Cartman.
      Cartman: You don't owe me anything. My hallways are clean.

    • Randy: What's going on?
      Jimbo: The kindergarten teacher's suspected of having sex with a student.
      Randy: With a student! But... she's a woman.
      Jimbo: Yeah, I know.
      Randy: But... she's hot.

    • Lt. Dawson: You're so full of crap Foley.
      Officer Foley: What! I did shoot him in the face... twice!

    • (Cartman talking to Kenny)
      Cartman: And so then, I put my finger up my butthole, right? And I walked up to Kelly Nelson and I said "Do you smell lemongrass" And she smelt my finger and puked. (laughs) Oh God, you should have been there.

    • (A depressed Kyle is sitting down, and Cartman comes)
      Cartman: There you are! What are you doing?? You giving up brah?
      Kyle: Dude, my brother's in Milan. There's nothing I can do.
      Cartman: No, they haven't left yet! Their flight is tomorrow morning.
      Kyle: How do you know that?
      Cartman: I had Beth check out their Travelocity account.
      Kyle: Who's Beth??
      Cartman: Beth is my b*tch! I've put a whole crew together brah. I'm gonna get that hallway defiling slut no matter what it takes.

    • Sheila: Help please I need your help, that teacher Miss Stevenson sh-shes left town with my son. I got a note saying they're going to Milan.
      Lt. Dawson: You're kidding?
      Sheila: No it's true.
      Lt. Dawson: Dammit!! Where were all these sexed up teachers when I was a kid?!!

    • Principal Victoria: Miss Stevenson, you're having a relationship with this student?
      Cartman: Yes, during class time, without a hall pass.
      Principal Victoria: This is unbelievable.
      Cartman: I know. It's like a hall pass doesn't even matter to her.
      Principal Victoria: Miss Stevenson, I will need to inform the police.
      Miss Stevenson: Oh god.
      Cartman: You just dealt with the dawg b*tch!

    • Cartman: Well, looks like once again the Dawg has prevailed. I hope you've learned kids, that if you don't go with Christ, you can end up just like that splattered bitch down on the pavement.
      Officer: Hey kid you need to get off the roof now.
      Cartman: That's cool. I'm done making my video anyways. (grabs his video camera)

    • Hotel Receptionist: Can I help you?
      Cartman: You see this woman brah? (holds up picture) She's staying here.
      Hotel Receptionist: Who are you?
      Cartman: (starts singing) I am the Dawg. The big, bad, Dawg!

    • News Reporter: Tom, an elementary school teacher is under arrest for allegedly having an affair, with one of her young students. The case is shocking, due mostly to the fact that the teacher is pretty hot Tom. If the accusations are true then... damn!

    • Officer: Some young boy is having sex with Miss Stevenson?
      Kyle: Yea.
      Officer: Nice.

    • Kyle: Mom, I think maybe you should talk to Ike about love and sex.
      Sheila: Oh, he's much too young bubby.

    • (Butters singing at the urinal)
      Butters: Hey there Mr. Weiner, what do ya know? Do ya have to tinkle tinkle? Yes I do think so!

    • (When Cartman is told that he has authority)
      Cartman: A-authoritah?

    • Lt. Dawson: Oh, alright we'll make a report.

    • Mr. Mackey: Now, Eric, being the school hallway monitor is a big responsibility, mkay. It is important that you take the job seriously and that you don't abuse the power.
      Cartman: Me??

    • Kyle: Ike, you need to have a life, have fun, then ruin it by having a serious relationship.

    • Car dealer: Get out of the car now kid.
      Cartman: That's cool. I'm done making my video anyway. *Cartman takes video camera*

    • Cartman: Bitch, get down! We can do this the easy way, or we can do it Dawg style!

    • Cartman: Beth, mace that guy, and that guy!

    • Social Worker: Was there ever a history of sexual abuse in your family?
      Miss Stevenson: No, but my Uncle used to ask me and my twin sister to kiss and he'd take pictures.
      Social Worker: (pauses) Nice.

    • Cartman: Oh God! She's using the Mel Gibson defense.

    • Cartman: You just dealt with the Dawg bitch!

    • Cartman: What's to understand? You get a boner, slap her titties around, stick it inside her and pee.
      Kyle: Stick it inside her and pee?
      Cartman: Well if you don't wanna get her pregnant you pull it out and pee on her leg.

    • Lt. Dawson: So what's the crime?
      Officer: The crime is… she isn't doing it with me.
      (officers laugh)

    • Miss Stevenson: When we make love, he can give it to me hard or soft and gent… (Kyle interrupts)
      Kyle: Alright, we gotta get outta here!

    • Cartman: Hall pass! Show me your hall pass.
      Kid: What?
      (Cartman slams the kid against the locker)
      Cartman: You know what this is? This is the mace they use on bears faggot! Now let me see your hall pass!
      Kid: It's right here.
      (pulls out hall pass)
      Cartman: All right, cool brah. Go with Christ.
      Kid: What, you can't just push me up against tha…
      (Cartman kicks the kid, sending him flying off screen.)

    • Cartman: You know why you're the hallway monitor? Because you don't have any friends. You should kill yourself! YOU SHOULD KILL YOURSELF!

  • NOTES (2)


    • Current Events:

      What Cartman is referring to the Mel Gibson defense is what Gibson done when he was drunk. She had slept with Ike and said she was drunk while Mel Gibson was drunk and said anti-Semitic remarks about the Jews.

    • Dog, the Bounty Hunter:

      The outfit Cartman wears as Hall Monitor is a tribute to Duane Chapman a.k.a., Dog, the Bounty Hunter.

    • Current Events:

      This episode is parodying the trend of student-teacher statutory rape cases in the past few years, such as the one involving Mary Kay Letourneau, Pamela Rogers Turner, and the more recent one with Debra LaFave.