Cartman needs a routine tonsillectomy. Cartman would prefer to keep his tonsils, but the promise of free ice cream entices him into the procedure. After the procedure Cartman wants his ice cream, but the doctor comes into his room with bad news. Cartman was given some blood contaminated with HIV. His mother is distraught and Cartman is pissed off, so pissed off he doesn't even want his ice cream. At school Stan, Kyle, Kenny and Butters are brought in and advised of Cartman's condition. The doctors advise the boys to treat Eric normally. Cartman is brought into the room. Butters reaches out and even gives Cartman a kiss. Kyle excuses himself from the room and goes outside and starts laughing, which Cartman hears. Cartman wants everyone to know the seriousness of his illness. There is an AIDS benefit held for Cartman that hardly anyone attends. AIDS was popular in the 80s and 90s; now cancer is the new fashionable disease, which is why Elton John, who was scheduled to appear, goes to a cancer benefit instead. Jimmy Buffett appears instead plays AIDS versions of his popular songs "AIDS-burger in Paradise" and "Wasting Away Again Because Of AIDS n' Stuff". At the bus stop the next morning Cartman berates the Kyle, Stan and Kenny for not coming to his benefit. He goes onto complain about how everyone seems to have forgotten about AIDS. When Kyle hears about Jimmy Buffet he starts laughing all over again and leaves. Cartman decides Kyle needs to be taught a lesson and gets Butters to help him out. Cartman sneaks into Kyle's room and injects Kyle with some of his HIV infected blood.
Kyle is at the doctor with what appears to be a cold, but he finds out that he's been infected with HIV. Knowing who probably gave it to him; Kyle goes to the school playground and finds Cartman, confronts him and then starts beating the crap out of him. In the Principal's office, Cartman admits to having infected Kyle with HIV and apologizes. Kyle also is forced to apologize for tattling. When they leave the office, Kyle leaves with a purpose, to break everything that Cartman owns. In Cartman's room the destruction begins. Cartman tells Kyle that he knows of the possibility of a cure, he's been doing some research; however, if Kyle breaks his XBOX 360 he'll never tell him. Magic Johnson has been living with HIV for about "fifty years" and he is the key to a cure. They both go to the airport, hoping to get two tickets to Los Angeles. When the ticket seller asks the boys if they have any cash, Cartman retorts "were not just sure, we are HIV positive" they don't have any cash, but this airline only let cancer patients fly for free. They look for another airline that cares to accommodate their "cancer" and are off to Los Angeles.
At Magic Johnson's home they meet the man, hoping that he has the key to the cure. Magic asks them if they are sure they have the disease and Cartman says "were not just sure, we are HIV positive". Kyle goes off on Cartman for using that joke again and again. Cartman wonders if Kyle isn't just being "HIV negative". Magic doesn't know why his body is resistant; Kyle wonders if there isn't something Magic is exposed to that others aren't. They look around the house and in Magic's bedroom they find huge piles of cash. Sleeping with money every night might just be the cure. They take this theory to the AIDS Research Center and the scientists there see the affect that cash has on HIV. With some convincing from Magic about the boy's friendship conquering obstacles (much to Kyle's disgust) the scientists decide to forgo trials and FDA approvals and distill Magic's cash down into a concentrated form. Cartman offers up Kyle as the test subject. The injection works, Kyle is cured. AIDS has been cured and the news is spread around the world. At a "Cure For AIDS" celebration, Cartman and Kyle's friendship is celebrated. Jimmy Buffet sings "Cure-burger in Paradise". Kyle decides to break Cartman's XBOX 360 anyway.