Special Unit 2 Season 2 Episode 7

Nick: Presley the Fire Fairy.
Wesley: Hey, who are you calling a fire fairy? I'm a fire devil.

Nick: Wait a second. You expect me to believe that you killed a dragon and now you're telling me you have virtues?
Carl: Keep it up, O'Malley. You'll be looking for "dragon slayer" in the classifieds.
Page: As much as I enjoy wasting my previous hours listening to your endless banter, here's my plan of action.

Nick: I hate lawyers.
Kate: You hate a lot of things.
Nick: I like to think it's part of my endearing charm.
Kate: And I like to think I'm Heidi Klum.
Nick: I like to think you're Heidi Klum too, with a big gun.
Kate: Really? You think so?
Nick: Not really.

Carl: Speaking of which, I know a guy who can you a real deal on tires if you're interested.
Kate: Yeah, stolen tires.
Carl: I prefer to think of them as "donated under suspicious circumstances."

Kate: No, you know what, talk to me when I'm done thinking you're a reckless out-of-control idiot.
Nick: Think we have enough time?

Carl: Now watch as a master shows you how it's done.
Nick: Like you showed us how to kill the dragon.
Carl: I'll pretend I didn't hear that.
Nick: I can say it louder.

Nick: You want us to just take you to the bus stop so you can get out of town?
Carl: You'd do that for me?
Nick: No.

Nick: You're a complete and total coward.
Carl: Fine. You go be brave and become an hors d'oeuvres!

(Carl, in a silver fireproof suit, is dragonbait.)
Carl: Then what am I doing out here? I feel like a baked potato!

Carl: What else you got, Cappy.
Page: We're in need of your services on this case, Carl. That doesn't mean I'm going to put up with your informality. Understood?
Carl: I'm not sure. Could you say it in a more intimidating baritone?

Carl: See--professional Dragon Killer.