Sports Night

Season 1 Episode 12


Aired Tuesday 9:30 PM Jan 05, 1999 on ABC



  • Trivia

  • Quotes

    • Isaac:Sally...
      Isaac:What do you want?
      Sally:Are you quitting your job?
      Sally:You're not?
      Sally:I heard you were.
      Isaac:You heard wrong.
      Sally:No, I keep my ear to the ground.
      Isaac:I have no doubt about it.
      Sally:And I'm happy for Dana.
      Isaac:She'll be glad to hear it.
      Sally:Can I be blunt?
      Isaac:There's evidence to suggest that you're capable of it, yes.
      Sally:I think I'm the right person for the job.
      Isaac:Who's job?
      Sally:Dana's job.
      Isaac:No, Dana wants Dana's job.
      Sally:Dana's gonna have your job.
      Isaac:No, sadly, I'm gonna have my job.
      Sally:I want to executive produce Sports Night. May I give you my credentials?
      Isaac:I see no way of stopping you.
      Sally:I've been executive producer of West Coast Update for sixteen months. Our show has never failed to win its timeslot.
      Isaac:You're on at 2am Sally. Your competition is a Bonanza rerun and four guys making cheese.
      Sally:To say nothing of Fox on Sports and CNN:SI, both of which were on top of us to the tune of a share point before I came in. My shows are tight, my shows are hot, and my shows are paced to within an inch of their lives. My staff is professional and they place a premium on professionalism.
      Isaac:My staff is professional, Sally.
      Sally:As we speak, one of your LC Wireframes is misprocessing data, while two of your associate producers stand over the monitor attempting to have phone sex.
      Isaac:God, please don't tell me which two...
      Sally:Just think about it.
      Isaac:Alright, my guess is, its Jeremy and Natalie.
      Sally:I meant, think about me for the job.
      Isaac:Dana's job.
      Isaac:When Dana takes my job.
      Isaac:And tell me again what I'll be doing?
      Sally:I heard organic gardening.
      Isaac:You can leave now.

    • Isaac: Finally, I'd like to say that while there are many programs here at CSC, and there's nothing wrong with healthy competition, we are all a family, and we are to treat each other with professional respect.
      Sally: I think I can speak for everyone on the "West Coast Update" team when I say we have nothing but respect for each and every man and woman who works on "Sports Night."
      Dan: He's talking about you, you freak.
      Isaac: Thank you, Daniel. I hope this meeting has cleared up any confusion. It's 5 minutes to 11:00. Please go do my show.

    • Casey: Do you really think Dana was flirting with me?
      Dan: Dana?
      Casey: Sally.
      Dan: You said Dana.
      Casey: I meant Sally.
      Dan: Stop thinking about Sally.
      Casey: I'm not thinking about Sally.
      Dan: This is science fiction. I'm all alone on this. I stand completely alone. Sally is an alien. Do you understand me? At night she peels off her body and lives on Steve Guttenberg's boat.
      Casey: And you can't get anybody to rally around that theory?
      Dan: My point is, you said Dana.

    • Casey: What's your problem with Sally?
      Dan: Look at her. I don't think she's of this world.
      Casey: You don't think she's of this world?
      Dan: I do not.
      Casey: What world do you think she's of?
      Dan: She scares me. She's too good-looking. Nobody's that good-looking. I'm not that good-looking.
      Casey: Do you really think she was flirting with me?
      Dan: And her beauty comes from a very strange place. Have you noticed that?
      Casey: The places her beauty comes from weren't that strange to me. I can identify almost all of them.
      Dan: Don't do it Casey. She's got an agenda.
      Casey: You think she wants a job on "Sports Night"?
      Dan: No, I think she wants to rule all of Metropolis.
      Casey: You see the job she does on "West Coast Update." She's a very skilled producer.
      Dan: Of course she's skilled. She's Satan's handmaiden.
      Casey: She's not Satan's handmaiden.
      Dan: On the entire planet, have you ever seen anyone with eyes like that? Huh? She's a Stepford producer.
      Casey: I say she's a very nice person.
      Dan: I say she has no reflection.
      Casey: You are worrying about nothing. She wasn't flirting with me, I wasn't flirting with her.
      Dan: It's a well-oiled machine here. I don't want to see anything interfere with that.
      Casey (looking at a piece of paper): Did a high school girl from East Lansing run the Boston marathon in 2.6 seconds?
      Dan: That doesn't sound right.
      Casey: Not as well-oiled as you think.

    • Issac: Couple of things, I am not quitting and I am not getting fired not today and probably not tomorrow. Let me add Dana that things I say in my office, stay in my office.
      Dana: Natalie's my second in command, she's the only one I told.
      Natalie: Jeremy's my boyfriend he's the only one I told.
      Jeremy: I told many, many people.

    • Dan: You could be having sex with Yoko Ono right now.
      Casey: Please don't ever say that again.

  • Notes

  • Allusions

    • Dan: You could be having sex with Yoko Ono right now.

      Yoko Ono is a singer and performance artist that was once married to John Lennon of The Beatles. Many Beatles fans attribute their breakup to her, although that was likely only a contributing factor.