Chris: 30's up.
Dana: Well that blows.
Chris: (To graphics) She's not wild about it.
Dan: First of all what makes you so sure that I like you right now?
Rebecca: Well you follow me everywhere I go and you ask me out all the time.
Dan: You're reading way too much into that.
Dan: Eleven years ago he pitched a perfect game.
Rebecca: A perfect game.
Dan: Yes ma'am.
Rebecca: And a perfect game is good?
Dan: Listen I know there's a lot of jargon but some of these are self-explanatory.
Casey: Maybe he met another woman and forgot all about you.
Natalie: Maybe I'll jam a number 2 pencil up your nose.
Rebecca: There's nothing about you I don't hate.
Dan: And yet you're mysteriously drawn to me.
Rebecca(smiling, then looking down): Yessss.
Rebecca: Have people ever tried to kill you?
Dan: Yes, but I defend myself with my superior wit and guile.
Dan: ...'cause we're pumped!
Casey: Dan's pretty excited.
Dan: Casey's speaking in tongues.
Casey: Allison, did you know I speak four languages?
Dan: You speak three languages.
Casey: I speak four languages.
Dan: You speak French, Spanish, and German.
Casey: I dabble in a little English.
Dan: Elliot! Did Orlando Rojas pitch this afternoon?
Elliot: He's pitching tomorrow.
Dan: Did he pitch in the bullpen yesterday?
Elliot: Yeah, Kelly was there, she saw him throw.
Dan: How'd his fastball look?
Elliot: Should be crossing the plate any minute now...
Featured song: "Sloop John B" by the Beach Boys.
The "previously on Sports Night" contains a scene of Jeremy talking to Natalie about taking a couple days off to go home, due to his parent's impending divorce. This explains Jeremy's absence at the start of the show. The scene in question never occurred in the show, however. Instead, the news of his parents impending divorce was revealed during Jeremy's voice-over letter to his sister Louise during the previous episode, How Are Things in Glocca Morra? and the scene, apparently shot but elided, appears only briefly in the teaser.