Season 1 Episode 7


Aired Tuesday 10:30 PM Aug 09, 2005 on Comedy Central
out of 10
User Rating
33 votes

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Episode Summary

The guys decide to spend some time away from their modern lifestyles by going out into the woods where nothing goes as planned.

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    Tim Blake Nelson

    Tim Blake Nelson

    Mountain Man/Park Ranger

    Guest Star

    Matt Ballard

    Matt Ballard

    The Deputy, Derrick

    Guest Star

    Watch Online

    Trivia, Notes, Quotes and Allusions


    • TRIVIA (0)

    • QUOTES (22)

      • (Speaking about the Mountain Man)
        Michael Showalter: But I don't understand, we ate him.
        Senior Deputy: No, think back. What you ate was hamburgers and french fries.

      • Michael Showalter: I thought it was a turkey!

        (Michael said this after shooting the Mountain Man with a pistol)

      • Mountain Man: It's split pea soup.
        Michael Showalter: Yes, I knew it!
        (Whispering angrily:)
        Michael Ian Black: I hate you.
        David Wain: I'm gonna kick your ass.

        (This is said after the guys were trying to guess the Mountain Man's jacket's color.)

      • Michael Ian Black: There really is a grizzly bear behind me, isn't there?
        David Wain: Worse. A goat!

      • Michael Ian Black: They say the wind always rises to the east, so the car must be... (Licks finger and puts it to wind) that way.

        (This is said after the guys get lost in the woods.)

      • Michael Showalter: I'm going through my frantic morning routine!!!

      • Michael Ian Black: Has anybody seen my socks?!?

        (This is said when the guys are going through their frantic morning routine.)

      • Michael Showalter: Why are you pointing the gun at me, David? I'm trying to help you!
        David: I know, it's weird.

      • Michael Ian Black: What are we going to do?
        David Call Marcus!
        Michael Ian Black: Yeah, call Marcus.
        Michael Showalter: Who's Marcus?
        Michael Ian Black: I don't know.

      • David: Sho's a real Turkey, right here.
        Michael Showalter: I am not a Turkey, David.
        David: I'm just...
        Michael Showalter: I AM NOT A TURKEY!
        David: Michael, it was just a joke.
        Michael Showalter: (crying) It didn't seem very funny.

      • Michael Showalter: So who did we shoot?
        Ranger: Nobody, a backpacker. His name was, uh...John Richards. He was a loser.

      • David: I know I can hunt but can Mike hunt? And Mike hunt?
        Mountain Man: Of course.
        David: No, no, no. But you say it.
        Mountain Man: Mike hunt. What are you guys laughing at? All I said was "Mike hunt". Now what's so funny about Mike hunt?

      • Michael Showalter: You never did tell us what the secret ingredient was.
        David Wain: Eh, cumin.

      • Mountain Man: Nature is fun.
        David: Like boobs?
        Mountain Man: But it can also be dangerous.
        Michael Showalter: Like fire boobs?

      • Michael Ian Black: If I ever see that guy I'm going to kick his ass.
        Michael Showalter: As if!

      • Michael Showalter: I'm cold.
        Michael Ian Black: I'm hungry.
        David: I'm David. (Makes fart sound)

      • Michael Showalter: Your finger can't tell your ass from your elbow, Mike!

      • Michael Showalter: I could "gopher" a snack right about now.
        Michael Ian Black: I'm gonna "pig" out.
        David: Well, why don't you be a "deer" and help us build a campfire.
        Michael Ian Black: Hey, quit "horsing" around.
        Michael Showalter: Hey, did you guys ever touch your dog's balls? (Pause) 'Cause I thought we were talking about animals. (Pause) Let's go camping.

      • David: You guys, what's happened to us? We've become zombies.
        Michael Showalter: Well, we're not zombies.
        David: Oh yes we are, Mike. Like For example: Right now, I want to eat your brain. Am I going to do it? No. But do I want to? Yes. Very much, very much!

      • David: I'm white, too. (Pause) What?!
        Michael Ian Black: You're an octoroon, David! Why can't you just admit it? There's no shame in it, but be who you are. An octoroon!

      • Michael Showalter: Who are you talking about?
        Michael Ian Black: The man!
        David: Who's "the man"?
        Michael Ian Black: The white man, David!
        David: But we're white.
        Michael Ian Black: Look, I cannot have this argument with you right now about whether or not we're white. Okay? I am just too zonked to open up that can of worms.

      • Michael Showalter: Oh god, this rat race is killing me. I'm so exhausted.
        David: I know, I can barely keep my eyes open.
        Michael Showalter: I can barely keep my pee-hole open.
        Michael Ian Black: My urethra shut down at four o'clock today. That's how tired I am.

    • NOTES (1)

      • The "Turkey Hunting" scene was redone from the first film on Stella Shorts 1998-2002. In both scenes they shoot the hunting guide, but in the scene from Stella Shorts, they walk away. When David Wain realizes he left his hat next to the body, he returns and performs a necrophilic act.

    • ALLUSIONS (4)

      • David Wain: We can make noise by playing a Dead song!

        This refers to The Grateful Dead, also known as The Dead, a psychedelic jam band formed in 1965 known for its unique songwriting style.

      • Michael Ian Black: The jacket. Is that J.Crew? Because it's really cute.

        J.Crew is a "preppy" men and women's clothing and accessories company that is famous for its catalog, which launched in 1983.

      • David Wain: What are we doing?
        Female Deputy: I don't know...
        (They make out briefly)

        These are the same lines used in the makeout scene in the Pilot episode, only the lines are reversed.

      • The scene where the guys are getting cleaned up by the rangers is meant to be a spoof of soft-core porn.