She's baaaaaaack! Her royal ass-kicking ginger awesomeness is back in the commandeered flesh.
And she's PISSED.
Apparently, in Abaddon's absence, hell got kind of wussified with Crowley in charge. The culture shifted from a traditional slaughter-all-the-innocents focus to a more modern office-full-of-slimy-salesmen approach and our gal is having none of it. With the Men of Letters as she knew them largely out of commission, Lucy back in lockdown, Crowley MIA, and the angels locked out of the mothership, Abby is revamping (or, in her mind, restoring) hell's image, starting with the meatsuits. Grandma was great for offering little league trophies in exchange for the souls of adolescents—and if Supernatural is still following its own canon, we have no reason to believe that the Grandma costume was any less powerful than the beefy Naval officer one—but the first step in any rebranding is to figure out what the new image is going to be. Vintage Hell is all over Abaddon's runway this season.
Sometimes change is good, though, and unfortunately for Abby, her old-school ambition to Kill All the Winchesters, Round 82 (ding!) went... about as well as her predecessor's attempts. This isn't exactly Sam and Dean's first kegger. I mean, girl followed the script perfectly. She had the "old friends" of the brothers who we literally just met ten seconds ago, and managed to kidnap them due to their being lesser hunters. A dash of guilt-tripping and emotional badgering got them driving halfway across the country to fling themselves genetically-gifted-faces-first at the OBVS trap like a buncha big damn heroes. Thank goodness for super secret angel BFFs who live in the back of your neanderthal skull and pop out like glow-in-the-dark defense mechanisms when the going gets tough.
SO ABOUT EZEKIEL—
I know I'm not going to win the Dean-and-Ezekiel-were-wrong-because-CONSENT-ISSUES argument, but I'm also going to try not to let my grossed-out feelings ruin Ezekiel for me because he's kind of weird and interesting. Years of watching Supernatural have conditioned me to assume the worst: He's not going to give Sam's body back, he's not who he says he is, he's got some nefarious motive for helping the Winchesters, whatever. All of this seems possible—logical, even—if we're drawing on nine seasons' worth of tradition.
But then there's the fact that Castiel vouched for him last week. He also hasn't really come off as untrustworthy, so much as he has odd, and not quite as worldly or experienced as Cas—he may even be a little naive. He seemed genuinely confused and concerned about why Dean was upset that he just took over the captain's chair when Sam was knocked out, "I was protecting your brother. I thought that's what you wanted." He almost seemed like a scolded child who'd only wanted to help, but inadvertently made a bigger mess in the process.
Like, say, how casually Zeke busted out the ol' memory wipe. I'm sure that won't start tripping alarms anytime soon. At this point, despite how early it is in the Season 9, it seems like it'd almost be a relief to Dean if Sam just figured everything out. The guilt that was horrifyingly missing from last week's questionable-consent-lovefest arrived late, but at least it showed up. Dean knows he did wrong. Even Sam's admission that he feels good and happy at the moment only served to make him feel worse. DRINK DRINK DRINK, DEAN. It's okay, boo. Feeling feelings is overrated. CHUG.
So. Ezekiel is hard to get a read on, which is fun. Abaddon is in total HBIC mode, which is also fun. Momma Tran might not actually be dead but we're probably not going to rescue her because she's not currently essential to the story—similar to why Adam is still in hell after four seasons—but Kevin is acting more like people and less like a plot device, so that's fun too! "Devil May Care" was a strong follow-up to "I Think I'm Gonna Like it Here" in that it didn't screw around and risk losing steam. In general, it was an enjoyable hour of TV that managed to set the stage for the rest of the season without revealing too much of the behind-the-scenes stuff that can bog down early episodes with endless exposition. Here's hoping Supernatural manages to keep up the momentum (and also that that BAMFy lady-hunter who was super unimpressed with Sammich doesn't get stabbed in the face the next time we see her).
And now, ice cream and strippers for all! See you next week for more Season Fiiiiiine!
– Is it just me or were Sam-zekiel's wings kinds of janky and bare looking? Because Ezekiel is supposed to be all weak and beat-up and stuff? Dude's even losing feathers! Look!
– OMG Sam with wings. UM. UH. I'll be in my bunk.
– Abaddon threatening to possess Dean: Please be foreshadowing, please be foreshadowing, please be foreshadowing. Jensen Ackles doesn't have the chance to get his evil on nearly as often as he should.
– Nervous LOL @ Abby threatening to torture people while wearing Dean as a prom dress because she doesn't think he knows what ripping a person's guts out feels like. Someone needs to get her hands on Season 4.
– So was Zeke flashing the Sam Winchester puppy-dog-eyes of doom because he knew they'd make Dean angst, or does Ezekiel have his own set of puppy expressions that just happen to resemble Sam's? OMG DO THEY HAVE A PROFOUND BOND TOOOOOO?
– Kevin Solo! I'm so happy he took his Midol and now, apparently, gets to do more than stare at tablets and whine. JUSTIFIED WHINING, SURE, but still...
– Except now that Kevin's officially been declared "family," his days are most certainly numbered. I give him 'til winter hiatus. How about you?
– It was nice to see the hunter community in action again, even if half of them were dead by the end of the episode.
– "I'm Sam Winchester." "Good for you." Awwww snap.
AIRED ON 3/9/2017
Season 12 : Episode 15
AIRS ON 3/30/2017
Season 12 : Episode 16