[Opening wraparound segment with the Crypt Keeper lifting weights]
The Crypt Keeper: It's disgusting what people will do to stay young.
Arnold Schwarzenegger: What's the matter with you? You want to keep that 90 pound corpse for the rest of your death? Keep Pumping while I tell the story. Tonight's story is about an old man who finds a new wrinkle in the fountain of youth. A twisted tale that we call "The Switch".
[Closing wraparound segment with the Crypt Keeper embalming a body]
The Crypt Keeper: Poor Carlton. Looks like he blew it. But no pain, no gain! I like a body that's nice and strong. It's your lucky day, fella. We want to pump you up! [laughs]