Tales from the Crypt (1996)

Season 3 Episode 5

Top Billing

2
Aired Unknown Jun 26, 1991 on HBO

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    • [Opening wraparound segment with the Crypt Keeper hosting Mashed-to-pieces Theater.] The Crypt Keeper: Good evening, culture vultures, and welcome to another installment of Mashed-to-pieces Theater. [laughs]. Tonight we ask the question, 'To be or not to be?' Or in this case, an actor stuck with an average face, whose so sick and tired of auditioning, he's willing to do almost anything. Did I say almost? I call this sickening saga, "Top Billing". [Closing wraparound segment with the Crypt Keeper hosting Mashed-to-pieces Theater.] The Crypt Keeper: Bravo! Encore! Well, Barry axed for the part and he got it. But typical Barry. They still couldn't have used his face. It's just as well. The critics would have cut him to pieces. [laughs] I'm calling my agent. I've waited all my death to play the part of Yorick, so until next time, kiddies. Hello? I'd like to speak with my agent. What do you mean he's in a beating?

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