Terriers Season 1 Episode 2

Maggie: (to Hank and Britt) You know the two of you suck shit at sounding sincere? How either of you ever gets laid astonishes me.

Hank: Mark, on my mother's grave, I was not lying in there.
Mark: Hank, you're mother was cremated.

Hank: What day is it, is it, is it Monday or Tuesday?
Britt: I don't know. I could check my phone, but it's in my pocket.

Hank: I think we should make up business cards.
Britt: What, put on windows and shit?
Hank: Or hand out, so people don't think we're just panhandling.
Britt: What do we call ourselves, "Dolworth and Pollack private investigators"?
Hank: Beats "Dolworth and Pollack shit shovelers."

Britt: Hey, do we need a mascot?
Hank: Like what?
Britt: You know like the "Trix rabbit" or "Tony the Tiger" or something.
Hank: No, those are for cereals. And taken.

Britt: Of all the dogs in the pound, we got to get a gay one.
Katie: Yeah, his cage was very tidy.