Gretchen: You'll never guess what I found. That wine decanter my uncle gave us as a wedding gift. The one you thought was a flower vase.
Hank: The one you thought I hocked.
Gretchen: I never said that.
Hank: Well, you thought it pretty loud.
Maggie: (to Hank and Britt) You know the two of you suck shit at sounding sincere? How either of you ever gets laid astonishes me.
Hank: Mark, on my mother's grave, I was not lying in there.
Mark: Hank, you're mother was cremated.
Hank: What day is it, is it, is it Monday or Tuesday?
Britt: I don't know. I could check my phone, but it's in my pocket.
Hank: I think we should make up business cards.
Britt: What, put on windows and shit?
Hank: Or hand out, so people don't think we're just panhandling.
Britt: What do we call ourselves, "Dolworth and Pollack private investigators"?
Hank: Beats "Dolworth and Pollack shit shovelers."
Britt: Hey, do we need a mascot?
Hank: Like what?
Britt: You know like the "Trix rabbit" or "Tony the Tiger" or something.
Hank: No, those are for cereals. And taken.
Britt: Of all the dogs in the pound, we got to get a gay one.
Katie: Yeah, his cage was very tidy.
Mark: You are a good friend. I give you credit for that. But you gotta know he is gonna let you down. Now maybe he won't do it on purpose, but, uh, he will. God knows that I love Hank, but it is not in Hank Dolworth to do anythin but self-destruct on people. And when he does, everybody catches shrapnel. I got the scars to prove it.
International Episode Titles:
Czech Republic: Psina s koňmi (Fun with Horses)
Original International Air Dates:
Czech Republic: November 18, 2011 on Prima COOL
"Wild One" by Those Darlins
"Motor Man" by Jocko Marcelino
"Don't Fight The Feeling" by The Itals
"Craigslist" by Zeke Johnson
"Aim Low" by The Professors
This episode was rated TVMA-LSV.