Bob (to Eric): Don't you "hey" me. My daughter stayed home from college for you...
Donna was accepted into college in Madison and was going to leave, but decided to stay in the sixth season episode Magic Bus.
Kitty: So what impoverished area will you go to? Is it East Milwaukee? I made a wrong turn there once, and I ended up in an awful neighborhood! There were kids playing radios on a street corner!
Eric: No, I'm not going to Milwaukee.
Donna: So, where then?
Kitty: Africa, Wisconsin?
Donna: So Kelso, you gonna break up with her your usual way? Send a note saying you got kidnapped by Kung Fu robots?
Kelso: No, it won't work with her. She doesn't even believe in Kung Fu robots. Just gonna have to talk to her.
Eric: Whoa! Kelso, you never break up with a girl to her face. You usually have me tell her you're dead... and then when she eventually sees you, you have me tell her you're a ghost.
Eric: Wait, mom, you knew about this? And you just said "Please, go ahead take my son's college money and use it on a muffler shop?"
Kitty: No... I think your father asked me if I thought you would amount to anything and I said "I really, really hope so." And then he said, "I'm spending Eric's money on my muffler shop" and then I made the best blueberry cobbler I have ever made.
Hyde: Man, that was good.
Red: Best cobbler ever.
Eric: Huh, I remember that cobbler. I always wondered why when I said it was so good you said, "At least I can give you this," and started to cry.
Kelso: So, there's a problem with my "sleeping with Angie's best friend" plan... Angie's best friend is Hyde.
Kelso: I'm gonna break up with Angie. All we have left is hot sex.
Fez: Hot sex? All I have is hot soup. And you can't make love to that... it's too damn hot!
Hyde (to Angie): How did you get a promotion? You don't know anything about music! Last week a guy came in asking for KISS, you slapped him across the face and called him a pervert!
Hyde: I'm just glad you won't be violating my sister anymore.
Kelso: I know you hated that. I would have broken up with her sooner but it was so damn hilarious!
(Hyde punches him in the arm)
Kelso: You be nice or I'll marry her!
Angie: I just got a promotion! Daddy says I've been doing such a great job that he wants me to move to Milwaukee, and help run the corporate office!
Jackie: Wait, what about Steven? He's the one who's doing the great job. You just sit around doing your nails and making smart-ass comments!
Angie: Jackie, that's you.
Jackie: Yeah. Well it's annoying, now isn't it?
(after hearing that W.B. is leaving Hyde fully in charge of the record store)
Jackie: Oh my God! I own a record store!
Hyde: No, I own a record store!
W.B.: I own a record store!
Jackie: Oh my God! I own one-third of a record store!
Jackie: Why'd you promote that whore Angie?
W.B.: You mean my daughter Angie?
Jackie: I stand by what I said. (W.B. looks angry, Jackie hides behind Hyde) You can't hit a girl!
Fez: I know what you should do? You should go to Hollywood and become the next Gene Wilder... that guy's a laugh riot.
Gene Wilder is an American comedian who stared in such movies as Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory, Young Frankenstein and Blazing Saddles.
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