Hyde: This just in: Your weirdo boyfriend sleeps in the nude.
Donna: Yeah? So? I do too.
Kelso: Oh yeah!
Fez: Oh, I can see it now. And it is glorious! (looks around nervously) Excuse me. (runs out)
Fez: Guys, Nina agreed to let me meet her parents. And to seem completely normal, I've come up with the perfect opening line for Nina's mother: "Hello Mrs. Bartel, I can see where Nina gets her lovely ass."
Kelso: You're so weird, man!
Fez: Oh, please! I'm a hot looking, smooth talking, frisky ass son of a bitch!
Eric: Hey Fez, right there! That's like, that's like a really weird thing to say.
Kelso: Yea, I mean we're used to you but dude, you're weird!
Kelso: I have a question! If Hyde was in Hyde's bed and Jackie was in Hyde's bed, what exactly was going on in said bed?
Hyde: Nothing! She needed a place to sleep.
Kelso: Needed a place to sleep! Well, a bed is an interesting choice now, wouldn't you say?
Kitty: Honey, do you have any idea where [Pam] might be?
Jackie: Well, the last postcard I got had a picture of some guy with a bone through his nose. What is that, like, Tennessee?
Kitty: What if the burglar has Steven?
Red: Well, then we'll try to talk him into taking Eric, too.
Red: Good God! Are you nude?
Eric: No... I'm wearing my toga.
Eric: Donna, you have to let [Jackie] stay with you; come on, she's your best friend.
Donna: She's not my best friend.
Eric: Well, then who's your best friend?
Donna (thinks about it): Oh crap. How the hell did that happen?
Narrator: No girl likes an unexpected parasite. Right, Kelso?
Red: Kitty, every time we have an empty room, you want to fill it up with a stray child. You're like the old lady who lived in a shoe.
Kitty: Did you just call me old?
Jackie: Eric, this house is like a shabby hotel, with really great service.
Eric: Oh hey, while you're visiting, here's my LEGO set and a picture of the space command center. Okay? Get building. And I swear to God, if my three-man escape pod doesn't fit the star bay, heads are gonna roll!
Kitty: What kind of burglar robs people on a weeknight? Doesn't he have a job to go to in the morning?
Kitty: What if it's a burglar?
Red: What would a burglar want to steal from us?
Kitty: My Shirley Temple figurines!
In the syndicated version of this episode, the narration for the man-pretty segment with Kelso and Fez is dubbed out.
(referring to everyone being present when Donna asked Jackie to stay at her place)
Hyde: It was like a damn telethon in there. The only thing missing was Jerry Lewis.
Jerry Lewis was the annual host of the Muscular Dystrophy Labor Day telethon, which began its annual broadcast in 1966.
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