That '70s Show

Season 5 Episode 4

Heartbreaker (2) (a.k.a. Kitty's Parents Come to Visit)

0
Aired Sunday 8:00 PM Oct 29, 2002 on FOX

Episode Recap

In the Forman kitchen, Kelso sees Hyde kissing Jackie, and asks Eric and Donna why; when they don't answer, he says that Hyde's dead and runs for the door. He gets to the door before they can stop him, but then can't open it. Eric opens it for him, but by that time, Hyde and Jackie are gone, and when Kelso tries to go out, he walks through the screen, and knocks it off. [Opening credits.] [Scene change: Kelso jumps up towards the camera.] In the Forman kitchen, Eric tells Donna that they need pudding, and lots of it; Kelso wonders who chooses a chick over a friend? Eric reminds him of the time that he made Eric walk home in the snow so that he could make out with Pam Macy; Donna tells Kelso that since he didn't want Jackie, she found someone else. Kelso again says that he's going to kick Hyde's ass; Donna reminds Kelso of how that usually turns out.. a montage scene: in the basement, Kelso puts gum in Hyde's hair; Hyde flips him over the sofa and they fight; Kelso shouts, "Ow, my eye!" ...in the driveway, Kelso licks Hyde's steak at a bbq; Hyde comes out and sees him; they start fighting and Kelso shouts, "Ow, my eye!" ...in the driveway, Hyde polishes his car; Kelso puts his butt on the hood; Hyde catches him and they fight; Kelso shouts, "Ow, my eye!"... Kelso says that Hyde broke the code and it's wrong, and Hyde stabbed him in the back. Donna gives him a big bowl of pudding, and asks how many things he's put his butt on; Kelso says that it would be quicker to count the things that he hasn't put his butt on. [Scene change: Kelso jumps across the screen.] In the Forman kitchen, Kitty tells Red that the call is about the Corvette; Red grunts and Eric, using a fake English accent says that they've just seen the male of the herd grunt his displeasure; Hyde, also using a fake accent, says that grunting indicates aggression; Red calls them both idiots, and points out that he's selling the car because they're having a baby, and the only reason to do that is because he has to believe that this one won't turn out to be a smart-ass. He takes the phone, speaks briefly to the person on the other end and then says, "Don't call here again," and hangs up. Kitty asks what happened; Red tells her that it sounded like the person was eating and he doesn't want some fat bastard eating in his car. Kitty says that she's going to the doctor today, because she's pregnant, then tells Eric that he'll have to pick up his grand parents at the airport at 5 p.m., and when he gets them back to the house, she'll tell them that she's pregnant. Eric and Red aren't too happy about Bea and Burt coming; Hyde asks what's wrong with them, and Kitty starts to explain that they're complicated people and can't be summed up in a few words; Eric says, "Grandma yells, Grandpa drinks." Kitty tries to explain that her mother is remote and can't say "I love you" even when it's the only thing that a little girl needs to hear; she then tells Eric that this is why she always tells him that she loves him, then tells him that she loves him. Hyde laughs, so Kitty tells him that she loves him too, and hugs him. In the Forman basement, Kelso tells Donna and Eric that he can't believe that they knew about Hyde and Jackie and didn't say anything to him. Donna says that they knew, but they were in denial. Kelso wonders how Hyde could do something like that; Kitty comes downstairs, and Fez is behind her; Kitty comments that it sounds like Kelso knows and Fez says, "Finally!" Kelso can't believe that both of them knew as well, but decides that it's still not as bad as Hyde not telling him himself, then decides that he's going to ~make~ Hyde tell him. Donna asks how he's going to do that? Kelso announces that he's going to outwit Hyde in a conversation; Kitty says that she'll go find the eye-patch and goes upstairs. Donna suggests that Kelso plan out how he's going to outwit Hyde, but he says that he doesn't need to do that. Hyde comes in; Kelso asks him what's up, and Hyde immediately says, "I guess you know about me and Jackie. Kelso declares that the battle of wits has begun. Hyde admits that he's with Jackie now; Kelso tries to attack him, but misses and hits his eye. [Scene change: Kelso jumps towards the camera.] In the car, Burt is driving; Donna thanks Bea and Burt for the dream catchers, then whispers to Eric that she likes his grand parents and she doesn't see what the problem is; he tells her to wait for it. Bea suggests that Burt switch lanes, but he says that it's fine. She tells him again to move over, but he still says it's okay, then she screams at him to move over, so he does. Donna understands what Eric was talking about. [Scene change: Eric loses his balance and falls towards the camera.] In the Pinciotti kitchen, Donna tells Jackie what happened when Kelso saw her kissing Hyde, and says that if Jackie doesn't work things out with Kelso, then everyone will have to choose sides and they won't be friends any more. Jackie says that she didn't do anything wrong, but Donna points out that Jackie is dating Kelso's friend and she has to talk to him. In the Forman living room, Bea tells Burt to come over and sit on the sofa; he says that he's fine by the bar; she tells him again, but he still doesn't, so she screams at him to sit; he does. Red comments to Burt that he's looking fit; Burt says that it's the dry heat in Arizona, then adds that they have air conditioning as well, and it's everywhere, so they can go from the house to the car and never feel the heat. Kitty comes in and Red jumps up; he tells her that she should tell her wonderful news to her parents; she doesn't want to and is clearly uncomfortable. Eric and Donna both say that she should tell her news; everyone is uncomfortable, and they all want something to talk about. Kitty tells them that the doctor said she's in menopause; Bea is shocked and tells Kitty to watch her language. Red asks her if she's not pregnant? Kitty says, "No, just barren, talk about that!" She goes back into the kitchen. [Scene change: Eric does push ups on the screen while Red looms over him.] In the Forman kitchen, Eric tells Kitty that he's sorry that she's not pregnant, as he knows that she wanted a baby, but he's not really sure what menopause is; Red tells him to shut up, and starts to explain, but then gives up. Bea comes in to get a drink; Eric suggests that Kitty can talk to her mother about it; Red thinks that's a good idea, and Kitty tells them both out of the kitchen. On their way out, Eric asks Red if menopause is a "lady-parts" thing; Red says that they can look it up in the World Book. Kitty apologizes to Bea for making a scene; Bea says that Kitty was just tired. Kitty gets angry and says that she wasn't just tired, she's going through menopause, and asks if it hit Bea this hard too? Bea says that she doesn't know because she never had it; Kitty points out that ~every~ woman has it, and Bea simply says that she's always been quite healthy, and that she always told Kitty to eat her vegetables, and then says that it's not nice to talk about it. Kitty points out that not everything that needs to be talked about is nice; Bea leaves to find Burt, going out to the driveway. Burt comes out from the dining room and asks if Bea is gone; Kitty says that Bea is crazy, but her father just says that her mother doesn't know how to talk to people; he tells Kitty that he loves her. From the driveway, Bea screams for Burt, so he runs out of the kitchen. In the Forman basement, Kelso comes in wearing goggles and tells Hyde that he won't be able to get his eye now; Hyde kicks Kelso... later on, Hyde is sitting on top of Kelso on the sofa; Fez gives him a wet-willy, and Hyde tells Kelso that they need to settle this. Kelso says that they don't need to settle it, all he needs do is pound Hyde, so that he'll hurt the same way that Kelso does. Hyde gets up and tells Kelso to take a free shot; Kelso gets ready to, but doesn't hit him. Fez and Donna both want him to do it, but Kelso tells Hyde to forget it, as it's not going to change anything. Hyde tells Kelso that he didn't plan for any of this to happen and he's sorry. Donna tells them that what they're going to do is shake hands and be friends again; they don't want to, so Donna screams, "Shake!" On the Forman back porch, Jackie comes up to talk to Kelso; she tells him that she's glad that she found him, and that she knows that she and Hyde should have told him sooner, but that when she wanted him, he ran. She tells him that she's with Hyde now and he needs to get over it so that they can all be friends; she adds that she's not sorry and she's not going to apologize. Kelso tells her that her apology is accepted. Jackie helps him with his eye. In Red and Kitty's bedroom, Kitty is getting ready for bed; Red comes in and asks how she is. Kitty says she's great, and it's nice to no longer be a woman. Red tells her that that's not true, then tells her that he's been thinking of what he could do to make her feel better, and he came up with something: he's sent her parents home. Kitty laughs and says that that helps. She tells him that she really wanted to be pregnant; Red tells her that the real kicker is that while they thought that she was pregnant, he sold the Corvette. Kitty starts to laugh and then hugs him. [Scene change: Eric jumps in the air in a sleeping position.] In the Forman living room, Red and Eric look up "menopause" in the World Book; Red is shocked that there are pictures, and comments that he could have lived his whole life without knowing that there was a mucus membrane. Eric comments that you can't unlearn these things. He then reads the symptoms for menopause: facial hair, irritability and mood swings, and tells Red that he thinks he has menopause. Red rolls his eyes. [End credits: In the car, Eric is driving his grand parents to the airport. Donna, in the back seat asks Eric to hand her a cookie; he says that he can't do it that while he's driving; she asks again and says that she just wants one, but he asks her to wait. Donna screams, "Cookie!" and Eric hands her one; Bea points out that you can catch more flies with sugar, and asks Burt if that's right; Burt pretends to be asleep.]
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