In the Forman basement, in the circle, Hyde tells the guys that there's a car that runs on water; Fez says that he's told them that a million times, and then adds that he's horny and hungry and would like a woman made of pizza. Eric tells them that they're both boring, then says his life is like Luke Skywalker's while he was still working on Uncle Owen's farm with nothing to do but work; Kelso tells him to shut up about Star Wars
because it makes him frown and that ruins his looks. Hyde says yeah, we know you're beautiful, then asks if anyone has anything new to say? The camera pans to Fez, Eric and Kelso, who all sit there silently, then back to Hyde who's also silent for a moment, then tells the guys that there's this car, and it runs on water... the guys all throw pop cans at him.
[Scene change: Fez falls away from the camera, Hyde staggers across the screen.]
At The Hub, Fez brings Nina some popcorn and a drink, tells her to enjoy it and he'll be smelling her neck if she needs him. Nina stops him and tells him that they need to talk; she says she needs some space, and adds that it's not him, it's her. Fez says okay, and that he'll just go home and do that other thing for the 12, 377th time. Nina tells him that's kind of gross; Fez tells her it's how he learned to count.
[Scene change: Donna makes peace signs, Hyde walks across the screen.]
In the Forman basement, the gang sits around watching The Six Million Dollar Man
on TV; Donna comments that she thinks that they've seen this episode before and that they were all sitting in the same places. Eric says that they do the same thing every day, they watch TV, eat a snack and then have a nap, and that it's like a nursing home. Kelso suggests that he knows what they could do that's different, then tells Donna and Jackie to take off their clothes and tells the guys to give him some room. Fez comes in and tells the gang that Nina's not with him because she wanted some space; they all groan and Donna tells Fez that Nina is dumping him. Fez says no, she said it was her, not him and they all groan again. Jackie explains that when a girl says that, it ~is~ you, not her. Fez is shocked that he's been dumped; Hyde adds to the explanation that when a girl says she wants to be friends, it just means that she wants you to do stuff for her but she's not going to put out; both Donna and Jackie nod.
In the Forman kitchen, Red laughs over the fact that Fez was dumped; Kitty says that the ladies in her Friday night cribbage game will be happy to have Fez back. Eric comments that at least Fez has a social life, while they're all hanging around with his parents; Red tells him to feel free to get out. Donna decides that they have to do something about the situation; Kelso remembers when the Bradys
got bored, then got a fat kid and things really livened up. Eric says that Kelso actually has a good idea, and that they should look for someone new; Kelso is excited that they're going to get a fat kid, but Red suggests instead that maybe they could get rid of some of the people they already have, like Hyde, or Kelso, or Eric. Kitty suggests that they add Lance Crawford to their group; Eric says that he and Lance hate each other, and that Kitty only suggested him because she wants his mother's peach cobbler recipe. Donna agrees that she doesn't like him either, and says that he's creepy.
[Scene change: Kelso crawls across the screen.]
In the Forman basement, the gang sits around trying to come up with names of people they can add to their group; Jackie says that all the girls she knows are either too snobby or too slutty. Kelso says that he's good with slutty; Eric suggests that they ask someone who has something to offer the group, like Mark Herman who has a dirt bike adding that he always liked Mark; Kelso points out that Mark sold the bike last week and Eric says that Mark's out. Donna suggests Kerry Gruber, pointing out that she has a trampoline, but Hyde objects, saying that she also has a big, hairy mole. Kitty comes downstairs and tells Eric that he has a visitor upstairs.
In the Forman living room, Kitty and Eric come in; Lance Crawford is sitting on the sofa, talking with Red; he tells Eric that he and Red were discussing how unrealistic Star Wars
is. Kitty says that she'll get some sodas, but Eric says that he'll do it and heads out to the kitchen.
In the Forman basement, Eric comes down and warns the gang that Lance Crawford is in the house; they all leave.
[Scene change: Fez struts towards the camera, Hyde and Kelso are on swings behind him.]
At The Hub, Fez asks Nina what happened to them as he thought they were happy, and yells at her to tell the truth. She says that he's too needy; Fez tells her that a man in his sexual prime has needs, but that's not what she meant. She says that his needs are fine, it's his neediness that bothers her. She didn't tell him before because she didn't want him to make a scene; Fez begins saying, "You didn't want me to make a scene?" more and more loudly, and stands up; he grabs the basket of fries off the next table and throws it on the floor, and shouts at Nina, "You dump Fez, I dump fries!" and turns to storm out, but stops and pays the guy at the next table a dollar for the fries.
[Scene change: Fez on a swing.]
At Fez's house, in the hallway, the gang arrives to cheer him up; Donna says that if Fez is alone in his room, they should knock, because he probably won't have any pants on. Kelso thinks that's funny and wants to catch Fez pantless and so goes in...
In Fez's bedroom, the gang walks in and is amazed by the room, which is filled with toys, games, large stuffed animals and has a race car bed. Kelso jumps on the bed, and from under the covers, Fez says, "Ow!" Jackie tells him to get up and out of bed, but he says that he's not wearing any pants. He tells them that Nina said he was too needy, and asks if he is, adding insistently that he needs to know. Eric tells Fez that he's the definition of neediness, reminding him of the time that he phoned Eric at 3 a.m. just to see if they were still friends. Hyde advises him to act like he doesn't care if he wants to get Nina back; Fez doesn't know if he can do that, and Kelso says that they'll help... they'll rebuild him, like the Six Million Dollar Man, and Fez imagines... he's an astronaut in a spaceship, but it's breaking up on landing; he's in an operating room, with Kelso, Hyde and Eric as the doctors, who rebuild him to make him less needy, cooler, suaver, and aloofer. Fez gets up off the operating table; Donna and Jackie come in and tell Fez he's hot, and they want him, but he says that they mean nothing to him; they both agree that this only makes him hotter and that they want him more. As they start towards him, he jumps backwards, away from them (with sound effects like the Six Million Dollar Man had when he jumped)...
Fez understands that he has to act like he doesn't need Nina. He says he doesn't need anything, and hops out of bed; everyone groans and turns away as he's not wearing any pants.
In the Forman living room, Red, Kitty and Lance are still waiting for Eric to come back with the sodas; Lance tells Kitty that they should just quit the charade as he knows why she really invited him over. He says that she wants his mother's peach cobbler recipe, and that his mother wants Kitty's stuffing recipe; he's there to arrange a swap.
[Scene change: Kitty dances towards the camera, Red walks across the screen.]
At The Hub, Donna introduces Julie to the gang, saying that she has two horses, a new Firebird and her dad works at Six Flags; the guys like her because she's blonde and pretty. She says hi to Hyde and tells him that she likes his hair; he offers to let her touch it, and Jackie blows up, and tells Julie that they're full and she should get lost. Eric says that he's going to ask Jake Bradley, the quarterback, adding that they have nothing to lose and they might as well shoot for the stars; he leaves. Nina comes in and goes to the jukebox; Hyde reminds Fez that he's a new man. Fez approaches Nina; she says hi to him and he tells her that she should use that on someone else because he doesn't need it, then sits back down.
In the Forman kitchen, Kitty writes out the recipe for her stuffing; Red tells her not to do it because it's the only thing they have that's better than everyone else's, but she ignores him. She and Lance swap cards; he says that his mother will be pleased. Kitty tells him to say hi to his mother for her, adding that she a very nice woman. Lance again says that they can drop the charade; Kitty says fine, she's cold, now get out; Lance leaves.
At The Hub, Fez tells the counter guy that he doesn't "need" the fries, he just chooses to eat something salty; the counter guy tells him to just take the fries. Nina comes in and wants to talk to Fez; she tells him that she was too hasty in breaking up with him and she likes the new Fez, but admits that she doesn't like the old Fez so much. Fez tells her that there is only one Fez, and that Fez has needs and if she doesn't like him, then they shouldn't be together. He then adds, "It's not me, it's you." She goes, and Fez announces to the ladies in The Hub that they all have needs, and that he needs a date for Saturday night. They all ignore him; Fez says, "12,378 here I come!"
[Scene change: Fez twirls around and looks up at the camera.]
In the Forman basement, the gang is watching TV; Eric comes in and tells them that he went to Jake Bradley's house and Jake was hanging out with his friends in his basement watching TV... he was even watching The Six Million Dollar Man
! Kelso is upset that they're not getting a fat kid to play with. Eric comments that there's only two months left until graduation and they shouldn't waste a second of it; Hyde agrees and says that they should seize the day...
In the Forman basement, in the circle, Hyde laughs and asks if they were supposed to be seizing something? Donna tells the gang that the Six Million Dollar Man needs a bionic nose, and Eric says that they should all appreciate this time, because he doesn't think that they can do this in college. Kelso laughs while eating a peach cobbler; he says that it's amazing and wonders who would just leave an entire peach cobbler sitting on the counter? Jackie says that they don't need anyone new in the gang, that they have interesting things to say, and Hyde agrees, and tells the gang that there's this car that runs on water. They all throw pop cans at him.
[End credits: In Fez's bedroom, the gang is playing with all the toys and games; Kelso is pretending to drive the race car bed. Fez comes in and starts yelling at them not to touch things, but no one is listening to him. Kelso jumps up and down on the bed; it breaks. Fez says that he's going to Eric's.]