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That '70s Show

Season 7 Episode 9

You Can't Always Get What You Want

1
Aired Sunday 8:00 PM Nov 24, 2004 on FOX

Episode Recap

In the Forman basement, Donna can't believe that it's Thanksgiving tomorrow. Hyde points out that it's time to give thanks and then get Fez drunk and dress him up like a lady Pilgrim. Fez tells them that the joke is on them, because he intends to put the dress on before he gets drunk; Kelso comments that he had dinner with Brooke last night so that he can see Fez in the dress. Eric tells them all that he has something special planned for Thanksgiving, and rather than tell them, he'll just let them figure it out, then he puts on The Grand Illusion by Styx. He tells them that there's a concert tomorrow night, and tickets are still available. Hyde says that he doesn't want to go, and even if he did, he can't, because WB wants him and Angie to have the record store open by tomorrow night. Donna says that she can't go because she's a DJ and it's in her contract that she can't be seen at a Styx concert. Fez just says yuck. At the record store, WB gives Angie the keys, and gives an extra set to Hyde but Jackie takes them, and tells him that he's going to have to make three of everything, not just two. Hyde says that as co-manager, it's time for him to make his first order, and it's going to be for pizza. Angie tells them that there's a lot of work to be done, and they have to unload all the records. Kelso tells her that he's there to help her, so if she has to reach for anything on a high shelf, he's there... watching. Hyde stands up and tells them all, "Let's hit it..." At the record store, in the circle, Hyde comments that he loves hitting it, and Jackie agrees, adding that they've never hit it before in... and she realizes that the record store doesn't have a name. Donna suggests "Hot Wax Recordz" with a "z" because that's cool; Hyde says that it should be "Funky Man's House of Funk;" Jackie suggests "Jackie" because that's hot and up-scale. Fez says that if they want hot and up-scale, they should go with "Dijon Mustard;" and Kelso suggests "The Head." They all think that's a cool name. Angie comes out and comments that she smells something burning; Hyde tells her that they came up with a great name for the store, but then can't remember what it was. Angie tells them that it's part of a chain and all the stores are called Grooves. Hyde tells them all that they've had a good day, and it's time to go home so that they can hit it again tomorrow; Kelso says that he remembers what the great name was: Lumpy's. When Donna tells him that that wasn't it, he says that when he has a store, he's going to call it Lumpy's. [Opening credits.] [Scene change: Eric and Donna dance on the screen.] At the ticket window, Eric is the first and only one in line. As he lays out his sleeping bag, two guys walk by, and he asks them if they're there for the Styx concert tickets. They tell him that if they weren't late for the party that they're going to, they'd kick his ass, then leave. The next morning, Eric wakes up, and is shocked that he slept so long. He rushes up to the window, and asks if there are any tickets left. The clerk tells him that the Black Sabbath tickets sold out months ago, but he says he's there for the Styx tickets, and she tells him that he's the only one. At the record store, Kelso tells Hyde that he loves the listening pit; Jackie comments that Hyde's very innovative and that he designed the whole thing himself. Donna points out that it's basically just Eric's basement. Angie comes in and wants to know where the soft rock section is, as it's now been replaced by the listening pit. Hyde tells her that he put it outside in the alley. She tells him that she just wants the store to be great, as this has been her dream. Hyde says that he wants it to be great too, and they argue over what the store should be like. Hyde agrees to put the soft rock section back, but wants a Led Zeppelin section, but Angie tells him that Zeppelin scares people over 30, which Hyde thinks is a good thing. While listening to Hyde and Angie argue, Kelso tells Fez that Angie's hot. In the Forman kitchen, Eric comes in and tells Kitty that he has a ticket to see Styx tonight; she says that it's Thanksgiving and he has to be at home. Eric tells her that it's a once in a lifetime opportunity, and that getting the ticket was really difficult. Even though she doesn't accept this, he thanks her for understanding and goes upstairs. Red comes in; Kitty tells him that no one is going to be there for Thanksgiving dinner and so there's no point in her making a big dinner with her special yams. She wants him to talk to Eric; he doesn't want to, but agrees to do it if she'll make the yams. [Scene change: Red walks across the screen, and Kitty dances towards the camera.] At the record store, Kelso is shop lifting a record; Donna catches him, and pulls it out of his jacket, and finds that it's The Grand Illusion by Styx. She's surprised by this, and Kelso admits that he likes Styx. Angie asks Hyde why he's not putting records in the bins; he asks what bins, and she realizes that she forgot to order them. Hyde says he'll take care of it, but it's going to cost her; he wants the Zeppelin section back, as well as the listening pit, and he also wants her to remove all the smoke detectors. Donna bumps into Fez and a record falls out of his jacket: The Grand Illusion by Styx. In the Forman driveway, Eric comes out of the house, and Red tells him that he can't go to the concert, saying that all families have traditions for the holidays; theirs is that someone cries, and it's not going to be Kitty this year, because he loves her. Eric says, "She threatened not to make the yams, didn't she?" Red orders him back into the house. [Scene change: Jackie dances towards the camera.] At the record store, in the circle, Hyde tells the gang that they need to find 100 record bins by midnight, and everything's closed, adding that it's the same damn thing every year. Jackie wonders how hair knows to grow and Hyde tells her to shut up. Fez wants her to keep talking; Kelso remembers that the great name was "The Head." Donna comes up with a great idea for the record bins, saying that milk crates would work, but then gets distracted by the idea of crepes. Hyde says that the milk crates is a great idea, and they can steal them. Angie comes out of the back room and asks what's happening with the boxes; Hyde says they're going to get ... they all say different answers. As they leave, Angie asks Kelso why they always do this, and Kelso tells her that it's Thanksgiving, and on Thanksgiving, some people bake pies, but they bake themselves. In the Forman dining room, Kitty, Red, Eric, and Bob are sitting around the table. Bob thanks Red and Kitty for inviting him over for dinner. Kitty announces that everyone should take a paper feather, and write on it things that they're thankful for, and then they'll all guess who wrote what. Kitty starts and says "I'm thankful for my wonderful wife/mother," and then admits that she wrote it herself, and even though it's true, it would have been nice if someone else had written it. Eric reads, "I'm thankful for pecan pie," and guesses that Bob wrote it. Red reads his: "I'm thankful I didn't waste my time going to a concert," and glares at Eric. Bob says that he thinks he's got Red's but he can't read it out loud, only a few words, like "Eric" and a word that starts with "mother." Kitty thinks that the "mother" part is nice, but Bob tells her that it takes a real hard turn after that. Kitty says that Thanksgiving is ruined, and runs from the room, crying. In a back alley, Donna puts on make-up and then goes up to the milk delivery guy and tells him that the truck is really sexy. He's quite surprised by this, and tells her that he hasn't spoken to an actual woman in years. She tells him again that the truck is sexy, and flips off her jacket, then hugs him. Jackie wants to start taking the crates, but Kelso wants to wait and see where things go with Donna and the delivery guy. In the Forman living room, Kitty and Red ask how Eric could skip Thanksgiving. Red adds that it's not just Thanksgiving, it's everything; Eric used to have goals, but now he's chasing butterflies and skating around dressed like Liberace. Eric tells them that he doesn't know what to do with his life, and he's scared that he'll wake up in five years and hate his life. Red suggests a government job; Kitty suggests that he become a chiropractor. Eric is still uncertain, and so Red tells him that for his 18th birthday, he got a draft notice. Eric asks if he wouldn't have liked some time to think about what he really wanted to do, and Red agrees that it would have been good, so gives Eric some time to decide, but says that if he doesn't decide, then he's going to have to do the chiropractor thing. [Scene change: Donna dance towards the camera, Eric struts across the screen.] At the record store, Donna can't believe that she had to kiss the milk man just to get some milk crates, and Jackie comments that Donna has done worse for less. WB comes in and asks why they have crates, pointing out that all the other stores have bins. Angie starts to tell him the truth, but Hyde interrupts, saying that it was his idea, and he thought it would look cool. WB says he'll leave it and see how it goes, then goes to see what Jackie is doing behind the cash register. Hyde tells Angie that she owes him for that. Kelso comes over and asks Angie if Hyde's being mean to her, and adds that if he is, Kelso can't beat him up but Donna probably can. Angie tells him that Hyde's actually being nice, and now that the record store is opened, she doesn't know what to do with herself. Kelso suggests that she take a little "Kelso-time" for herself. She says that she never got a Thanksgiving dinner, and he offers to take her out for tacos. [End credits: In the Forman basement, the gang listens to The Grand Illusion; Eric comments that Jackie was rocking out to it. Jackie says that Fez was mouthing the words to the song, and Fez claims that he thought it was okay to do that because Hyde was tapping his foot. Hyde says that he was just squashing a bug. Eric asks Donna if she's okay, and she looks at him, then blurts out, "I kissed the milk man!"]
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