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Tuesday 9:00 PM on The CW (Returning April 24, 2018)
YOU GUYS!

Quick Poll: When was the last time you were this satisfied?
  • - When the power went out so you “had” to eat all the ice cream in your freezer before it melted
  • - That time the street-meat vendor gave you TWO sausages in your hot-dog out of pity
  • - The seven-minute hug your friend gave you because “she” needed it

POP QUIZ HOT SHOT - what are my favourite things (besides ice cream)? I assume you all answered reunions and hugs (and red starburst). REUNIONS AND HUGS, YOU GUYS. The whole band is back together, and it is so violently delicious. And Raven and Murphy played soccer! *happy twirl in a field of flowers* I’m not sure how The 100 got a hold of my vision board, but thank you. Truly.

At this point, because it is the case for every episode of this delicious romp of a show, it should go without saying that SO MUCH HAPPENED. I mean, the most important, of course, is the soccer thing, but also all the criminals are awake! And Diyoza’s truuuuuueee colours are shining throughhhhhhhh… and she stole Abby! And Octavia almost straight-up murdered one half of Kane and Abby’s sexual tension. I spent a lot of time this episode screaming, DON’T YOU DARE, and now my throat hurts, and I couldn’t be more happy about it.

Pandora’s Box picked up from the last moment of Red Queen, showcasing Kane’s new ponytail, the allure of which no human can deny. Abby, however, was dealing with a serious case of FOMO.


As we immediately learned (and suspected two weeks ago), Kane is in the ring for Abby, which is why she’s currently locked up and missing the show. And WHAT a show! Kane really rocked the “I hate this I hate this I hate this” vibe while murdering those people!



Because his remorse made the crowd uncomfortable with their own moral compass, Octavia was forced to give him a D or something, so he has to do a make-up exam tomorrow.

And that was the COLD OPEN. The opening credits hadn’t even scrolled yet, and we were already watching one of our more level-headed, honourable heroes MURDERING A BUNCH. Hahahahhaha delightful!










POP QUIZ HOT SHOT - is my crush on Diyoza still raging with the burning passion of a thousand suns? *answers found in the back of the book*. Before the squealing of a legion of shippers echoed through the land, Bellamy propositioned Diyosa to get his sister (and a few others) out of the bunker, in exchange for their 283 criminalsicles. And a deal was struck! Then our two dreamy protagonists-ish-types hugged a bunch and it was MAGIC.

Meanwhile, the Spaceventure Duo was having a great time researching exposition, and letting each other other (and us) know that Diyosa was a Navy SEAL who became a terrorist.





Then Bellamy called to go over the rules of the game one more time, and also to casually mention that Clarke is still alive.



After listening to a very touching radio-reunion, Diyosa and her team were like, “wow, these kids really care about each other. They’re so full of compassion and tenderness. Maybe we CAN cohabitate peacefully.”

Just joshin’. They were like, “let’s steal their doctor-mom!” WHY, you ask? For a cure! For WHAT, you ask? We don’t know! Intrigue!!



Then Octavia had a super nice visit with Kane.





These two! What a time they have. She basically told him that he reeeeeeally shit the bed, but then Kane was like, “k, but, am I the ONLY one shitting the bed here?” and she was like, “there’s no shit in MY bed, if that’s what you’re insinuating,” and then they had a sexy staring contest. Girl is off the deep end and I LOVE IT.


Indra lights up my heart any time she is on screen. I love that she is 100% loyal to Octavia and yet she sees that her girl is going bonkers. She lead Kane to Abby in order for her to convince him not to pull a Peta Mellark, but Abby was like, “I have a confession to make. Who boy, this is hard. *deep breath*, It was I who-” and Indra was like, ‘um, yeah, obvs,” and she left them alone to sexual tension at each other. I. Love. Indra.



Abby is tweaking!! She’s addicted to pills! To the point where she would steal them and become an enemy of Wonkru.

Up in space, the glorious friendship that is the light that guides us through the darkness was being used to exposition, and I ain’t even mad. Turns out the mining ship is the last of 4 to be sent out, and there’s a mysterious number 3 still out there. #ChekhovsHithelodium

Then we got a cyber meet-cute when Nice Cop tried to hack into Raven’s computer-palace.



Is it weird that these two characters haven’t even met yet and I already ship it? Anyway, she thwarted him, obviously. The Beautiful Creepster was all, “ohhhhhh boy, do we get to kill them all now? Is it time? Eeeeeeeeekk I didn’t think I’d be this nervous! Okay, one… two…” and Raven was all, “DENIED, FOOL!” because she clearly isn’t as into mass murder as the rest of her friends.

Meanwhile in Bunkerville, Octavia was making Kane do his make-up test, but he was throwing his version of a hissy.







She did! She DID go down there! She was all, “c’mon man, follow the rules,” and he was all, “naw, I’m pretty bummed about what terrible people we all are,” and she was like, “seriously dude,” and he was like, “seriously though.” I know what you’re thinking - my capacity for remembering exact dialogue is mind-blowing. I was born this way.



Octavia was about to straight-up murder Kane!!!! You could tell she didn’t reeeeeeeeally want to, but she was GOING TO. Oh man, Octavia, I worry about you and it is DELIGHTFUL.

BUT THEN - just as Octavia was about to plunge her sword-of-a-thousand-or-so-deaths into our beloved Kane, guess who dropped in!



THIS GOT ME, okay, show, are you happy??? Octavia muttering “I knew you’d come” was a LITTLE TOO MUCH on my emotions. She may be the Red Queen, she may be a little on the bonkers side, and she may have been seconds away from murdering a hunky father figure, but Octavia is still a little sister, and her hugging the one person who reminds her of who she really is GOT ME REAL GOOD.


HAHAHAHHAHA did these two bump into each other at a conference? This was perfect. These two awesome kickass ladies have never been close, and a hug would have been forcing it. Well done, all.



I loved the glances that Diyosa and Bellamy were giving each other when taking in the sights of Bunkerville. Like, they may be sort-of-enemies, but that doesn’t mean they can’t be united in their social discomfort. Anyway, Octavia was like, “ya’ll bad guys?” and Bellamy was like, “who them??? Hahahahha nooooooooo!”

Up in space, Raven caught the Beautiful Creepster creepin’ beautifully in a dead person’s tiny sleep-home and then they got to the bottom of the REAL reason he stayed behind.



Murphy stayed behind so that Raven wouldn’t have to pull the lever, and OH MY HEART. This friendship is maybe the greatest gift The 100 hath ever bestowed upon us.

Then, in yet another beautifully satisfying reunion…


Abby pulled a classic mom-move and swept any possible emotional baggage under the rug in order to carry forward the plot / thanksgiving dinner, but I SEE YOU ABBY, and I worry.

Then Octavia took a ride topside, and Gaia (HI GAIA!) had everyone chant their drinking song, and it was intimidating and a little creepy? I LOVE IT.



Look, I know there wouldn’t be a show if everyone were friends, but just IMAGINE these two being pals, okay? It’s so good, isn’t it? Skeptical sassy looks, deep-voiced badass quips, heroic adventures, playful kerfuffles… *sigh*



Bellamy tried to rap with Octavia about how she’s even more in love with murder than when he previously saw her, which he likely didn’t think possible, but she was like, “ain’t nobody got time for that, byyyyyyye.” And while this cute sibling reunion / intervention was taking place, Indra was sneaking Kane from the bunker because INDRA IS THE BEST AND IS NEVER ALLOWED TO DIE.


The Beautiful Creepster and Raven were playing soccer….. I’m sorry, can we just take a quick 5 hours to really revel in that last sentence? Hmmm… I’ll repeat it for prosperity: the Beautiful Creepster and Raven were PLAYING SOCCER when Diyoza opened the bay doors to suck out all the oxygen on the ship, which would kill them because I guess humans need oxygen to live? I don’t know. I’ll have to take the show’s word for it. I’m not a doctor.



Murphy and Raven opened the pods!! So Giyoza was forced to close the doors to save her own people.


If this isn’t a recipe for a sitcom, then I don’t even know who I am anymore.

Back on earth, things got a smidge tense when Diyoza was like, “actually folks, I AM a bad guy! (or am I?)” and she started shooting the place up. And Bellamy was all, “BUT!” and Diyoza was all, “NUH UH, SUCKA”, and then Abby and Kane ran in and were like, “omg relax.”


It’s a win-win! Diyoza gets her doctor and Kane and Abby’s Sexual Tension is safe for another day! Sure, Abby had to abandon the daughter she was mere minutes ago reunited with, but hey, welcome to The 100!



This is gonna be goooooooooood!!! Octavia wasn’t super thrilled about this whole situation, especially after one the crazier Prison Peeps shot at her with his future-boom-stick.


Oh, and the Prisoner Peeps tried to shoot some missiles into a crowd of innocent people, but ‘Raven’ jammed their signal (maybe? Or was it Good Cop?), so Diyoza was like, “let’s go meet this Raven.”


EIIIIIEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE YOU GUYS! Do you think they’ll meet her and every single one of them will instantly fall in love (who wouldn’t), and then they’ll all team up and stop global warming? I do.

What did you guys think??? Are you wildly satisfied? Are you filled with delightful anxiety? ME TOO!

SOME STUFF:

  • - What task was the rest of the Spaceventure Squad given to keep them busy while Bellamy was out heroing? Gathering berries? Making a list of all the violent ways their lives could end? Writing out their inside jokes so they don’t forget them?

  • - Look me in the eye and tell me you’re not shipping Nice Cop and Raven. You can’t, can you? Do they already have a shipper name? Do NOT disappoint me, internet!

  • - Hot Goss is fun to say. Do it RIGHT NOW.

  • - A Miller / Bellamy hug!

  • - Hi Gaia!

  • - “How many people should we be prepping for extraction?” - “1200”, “814” OUCHIES.

  • - The song that woman sang before the cage fight was GORGEOUS. Is it the same Grounder chanteuse from season 3?? Was it season 3? Or 2? Does this woman have some kind of album I can buy this very moment? Someone inform me!

  • - This show is so consistently well written / directed / acted / shot… I just… I should be telling a joke or something, but damn, I’m out. It’s just so beautifully done, and everyone involved is so talented and maybe you could come to my birthday party or something no pressure.

  • - Ah, those sweet, sweet glimpses of #Mackson

  • - What happened in the dark year?!?!??! (OMG don’t tell Octavia I was asking)

  • - Abby! Don’t do drugs! Stay in school! Drink milk!

  • - Why do you guys think Raven hasn’t re-done her ponytail? Is she mad at those particular strands of hair? Does she think they don’t deserve to be with the other strands in the ponytail?

Okay bye, warmest regards!
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May 29, 2018

I read the caption as "Can't wait for all the hot DOGS" then saw Raven respond with Goss & was all confused, lol, guess I'm craving hotdogs :P

Amazballs recap as usual &3

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May 30, 2018
DAMMIT NOW I WANT HOT DOGS
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May 28, 2018
OMG TONI!!!! Go watch  'The 100 season 4 Bloopers'
Skip to the last 10 seconds! (I mean, watch it all, but..)
I'll know in your next review if you did, cause you'll die &3
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May 28, 2018
Yeah, I've seen it. My heart exploded.
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May 21, 2018
I didn't think a hug between Clarke and Octavia would feel forced (they haven't hugged before?) so I wasn't expecting an awkward handshake, until I realized, 'of course Clarke's lightning fast deductive skills surmises the dark state of that bunker in 1.2 seconds flat. And if the blood on Octavia's forehead didn't give it away...
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May 19, 2018

Loved when Bellamy told Octavia that the deal was no weapons and she doesn't even look back and says, 'not my deal' I don't think Bellamy gets that his little sister is much more of a bad ass than he is. Diyoza on the other hand, I think she understood that ten seconds after meeting Octavia.

It was awesome how when Abby ran out and said, "we'll come without a fight" and then Octavia snarled out, "I bet you will" If there ever was proof that Octavia belonged on the ground, that was it. I genuinely like Kane but he needs to find a new girl because I think Octavia just might skewer Abby given the chance.

I wouldn't get my hopes up, not for the Echo / Bellamy Shippers. I think any influence he had with Octavia ended with the words, "I trusted you, this is your fault" RIP Echo: you were almost as awesome as Raven

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May 18, 2018
The Clarke and Octavia embrace is why this show is so good..They never saw eye to eye but recognize they are bad bitches. Every hug that happened killed me because i knew things were going to well.
The Diyoza and Octavia interactions were heat, i loved Octavia's cold blooded ''who are they'' without looking at them. Diyoza had some balls when i felt she had a little jibe at Octavia's war paint. Im enjoying her character as she is proving to be a tactical threat as well as having firepower.
I don't think Octavia is that insane right now. I expected worse. Considering being under the floor again so to speak must have been tortue and her worst nightmare atop of being in charge of it all. 814, and like Jaha i expect she knows there names.
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May 18, 2018
Hells yeah!!!! How cool was that interaction,

you get the side glances and then the "war paint" sass and Octavia just blank stares her...
Diyoza raises her voice, addresses the bunker and does the whole "You can all go grab your things and we'll take you out of here." Everyone remains dead still and Octavia lets a very long couple of seconds tick by and only then after she nods her permission does Wonkru starts moving.
(That's right Diyoza, Bloodraina is most definitely a higher rank than Colonel or whatever) .                  :-)
[Please no comments about my use of the made up term "long seconds", I swear they're a thing]
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May 18, 2018
Like Madi said Skyrippa is Beast. No worries about ' long seconds' Lol...where im from we refer to it as 'dead air' or 'air time'
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May 18, 2018
You guys! Seen this hotness! What is going on with these two:
https://www.pinterest.co.uk/pin/513199320017359666/
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May 18, 2018
Raven and Murphy were my favorite this week. I never thought we'd get better than last year's "I'm sorry for doing this to you, Raven," and his acceptance of her decision to take the rocket up instead of going to the bunker. But the Beautiful Creepster stayed behind to help with murder! Plus playing soccer with our delightful Raven. Yet another five seconds of happiness to add to The 100's collection of Fleeting Moments of Fun Before Disaster. Maybe this is why Clarke has the No Fun policy.
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May 18, 2018
Thank you for another hilariously spot-on review. Much appreciated, especially knowing you were on a work retreat.
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May 18, 2018
Thanks! I wrote half of this on a plane!
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May 17, 2018
Have a ship name for Raven and Shaw: Ravshaw...you know, like ravish in romance novels
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May 17, 2018
The Grounder singer is Julia Dominczak. She was credited with both songs. So pretty.
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May 23, 2018
Is that her voice in the opening credits too?
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May 17, 2018
I knew it! That was the first thought when they did that brief shot of her in the bunker. Looks like Clarke isn't the only blonde left in the Grounder clan.  And Echo too now that the Space Cadet Kru is now officially back on the ground
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May 17, 2018
My fav reunion was probably when Murphy found out that Clarke was alive and half-smirked. If he ever gives more than zero fucks I will be supremely disapointed.
I feel compelled to point out that Abby was only stolen in the way something that runs screaming into your arms shouting "steal me! and steal my friend too!" is stolen.
I feel like Indra's only role in this eppie was to sternly break up reunions because there are more pressing matters. Also, I call them eppies now, DEAL WITH IT.
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May 18, 2018
I like Murphy being one of the remaining Space Kru, but I feel like we missed the opportunity for some high-quality snark. Bellamy and the others land in a nearly-empty planet after eight years all by themselves, and in less than five minutes a random kid runs up and says "Bellamy! Clarke's in trouble!"
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May 18, 2018
Yes - more snark (despite my guilt of looking a gloriously violent and crazy  gift-horse in the mouth) I want the show to up the snark!

Oh and about Indra - the fearless grounder warrior with the soft heart for Kane - I want more.

Eppies, you say... hrrmmmm! Dealing with it!
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May 17, 2018
Yaye, I love these!
I think Octavia has become a low-key dictator...And maye her ppl wil turn against her. Those were 400 important ppl they needed, did they not.  Skykrew had the most historical knowledge…is most of it lost now?
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May 19, 2018

I think during the "Dark Year" the people tried to either replace her (aka kill) or maybe the power went out and anarchy reigned for awhile. Whatever happened then is when Octavia went a step or ten closer to Full Metal Jacket status. One thing is real clear. When Diyoza told them to go, not a soul moved until Octavia gave the nod. The people may not be shiny and full of joy but they know who to listen to.

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May 23, 2018
Yeah, with this latest ep it shows she's too close to the edge. Also, I'll have to watch that part again. I thought they moved before she told them they could, and that's why she looked so posses after.
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May 23, 2018
Pissed*
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May 25, 2018
I think she's gonna pass out the koolaid and is likely to be unhappy (kill everyone) with anyone who doesn't take a sip
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May 16, 2018
Thanks for the recap! :) Lots of reunions, and I love it!
"Look me in the eye and tell me you’re not shipping Nice Cop and Raven. You can’t, can you? Do they already have a shipper name? Do NOT disappoint me, internet!"

Nice Cave-in?
Hot Crave-ing?
idk lol
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May 17, 2018
We'll workshop it!
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May 18, 2018
So..... we're not committing to Nice Cave-in?
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May 18, 2018
His name is apparently Lieutenant Miles Ezekiel "Zeke" Shaw (http://the100.wikia.com/wiki/Zeke_Shaw. I'm putting out there Shaven and Savin' along with Riles and Raw for consideration at the work shop.

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