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I ... can't... WHAT

Monty! Clarke! Finn! New Kid! So many lives hang in the balance. One of my very favourite / most hated things about TV is when the episode ends so abruptly, with so many unanswered questions that I actually yelp at the TV screen.

It’s my favourite because it’s AWESOME, but I hate, hate, hate it because I want the next episode RIGHT NOW.

You guys, there were a lot of things going on in this episode. That’s always a gamble for TV because the story can seem disjointed and muddled. OR, it can be totally awesome and dark and thrilling and awesome and sexy and awesome. Well, this is The 100, so obviously they nailed it.

Clarke killed a guy! Monty is missing! Abby is alive! Finn is about to be brutally murdered and Clarke is hanging from a tree like she’s Wile E. Coyote.

I feel like I need a few hours to chill out in a tiny overheated vent to digest it all, you know? BUT I WON’T because I’ve got some recapping to do!

The hour began with a nice chat between Bellamy and Clarke.

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DAMN, you guys! This episode was generally very sad, ammiright? Did anyone else want to give these two a hug??

Before we could start openly weeping, we jumped into space.

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I may be dating myself with that reference, but Kane looked like he had a ROUGH night. I was very pleased to see him alive, though! His redemption story kicked into turbo this episode, which you all know I love.

Down below, a fellow we hadn’t met before was giving Octavia some serious guff.

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You guys, there is something you need to know about me. I adore things that rhyme (and alliterations, if we’re sharing), so when this new guy called Octavia “Grounder Pounder” I laughed very hard and he became my new favourite. This guy for the win, episode MVP.

Also, the Beautiful Creepster gave her a look that said “I like your spunk”, and I’m guessing a ship was born.

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Raven insisted they were “good”, but we all know what “good” means on this show! Speaking of people not being “good” when they say they are, I guess everyone just assumed Connor died of natural causes? That’s not sarcasm. With that virus knocking people about, it really was the perfect murder.

Anyway, they heard a ruckus.

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Their food cabin burnt down! It was clearly the fault of everyone’s favourite wordsmith (still giggling about “Grounder Pounder”), and Murphy told him so.

Of course, we all know what this means!

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Was it just me, or was everything Clarke did this episode screaming “I am very over this”? I do NOT blame you, Clarke! Your life is a nightmare. I rather enjoy that we’re seeing the emotional effects that being on a hellish horror-scape of danger would do to a bunch of teens.

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Okay, sure! I don’t even mind The 100 introducing new characters when we’re eleven episodes in. There are a LOT of teens on the ground, let’s get to know some of them!

Finn joined them, which brought on another fit of hurt glances.

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Raven was going to leave, but Bellamy dialed his charm to eleven and convinced her to stay by pointing out how much the camp needs her.

Meanwhile in space, Kane was making friends!

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Kane lights up my life, you guys. He saved that dude and they became instant best buddies, then they found MORE friends.

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On the ground, the hunting party wasn’t going so hot.

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The Grounders shot the new kid! Twice! And then Clarke and Finn got knocked around a bunch.

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Up in space, Kane was very adamant about saving everyone, mainly because he was essentially responsible for killing 320 people, including an adorable befreckled father whom we shall NEVER FORGET.

Anyway, he was convinced the air was a message.

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Haha, I loved when this guy was like, “your brain isn’t working”, and yet he followed him anyway! This instant friendship is now the heart of the show.

Clarke and Finn weren’t having such a great time in the Grounder camp.

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Guys, I know I have to stop saying that I love people. I’m reviewing a TV show, not getting drunk with my sorority sisters. But I LOVE Anya (and Dichen Lachman who plays her). I want so much more of her.

Anyway, she layed out the rules of the game, which were basically if Clarke doesn’t save the injured Grounder girl, Anya will kill Finn.

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Up in space, Kane found the monitoring room, and the new awesome guy got the intercom working.

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Kane told everyone to skedattle, but that wasn’t going to fly. Not for the people of the Ark! Ark folks stick together! Goonies never say die!

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Yes, I just referenced a Brian Adams song from 1993. I’m old. Sue me.

Back at the Grounder camp, Anya told Clarke what happened to the dying girl.

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Clarke wasn’t even at the bridge bombing, nor was it her idea, but she’s still taking the flack. Man, being the leader is NOT a fun gig. Raven and Monty had a charming chat about how the frequencies on the radio are different now. Of course, any time a TV show has weird radio frequencies, I immediately assume aliens. So, aliens for season 2, you guys!

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This is the second week in a row where Monty’s feeling were hurt. I get that this show is a terror-ride of nightmares, but c’mon… there’s only so much a viewer can take.

The hunting party came back sans Finn and Clarke, and Raven jumped on the conclusion-train that they were on a trip to Bone Town.

Guess what else she jumped on!

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Good for both Bellamy and Bob Morley for playing it so cool in the face of some serious mega-foxiness. I bet that was a real chore for him to shoot. A reeeeeaaaaal chore.

Meanwhile, the Grounder girl wasn’t doing great, and Clarke had to do that thing that TV shows love to do, and stick a tube in a part of her body where tubes shouldn’t be.

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I adored how put-off the Grounder fellow looked.

Kane saved Wipperobrious, and it was lovely.

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The Grounder girl became septic and Clarke was very peeved.

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Up at Space Camp, Kane and Vivonious got some good news.

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Meanwhile, Death Count wasn’t as fun as it sounded.

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Oh my! Anya gave the order to kill Finn and they took him!

Also not having the time of his life was Kane. His adventure through the vent seemed very unpleasant.

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But look who he found!

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ABBY! it’s Abby, you guys! She did NOT perish in a fiery inferno.

The nice-ish Grounder that helped them during the “surgery” was trying his best to recruit Clarke into the Grounder clubhouse.

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She slit his throat! That was INSANE. Clarke has gone dark, you guys, and I’m not just saying that because I love rhyming.

Bellamy, Raven, Monty and Octavia went searching for them, and found an adorable glorified extra in the bushes. They decided they had to get him back to camp instead of looking for the main characters (I respect it!).

Also, Monty found something mysterious and disappeared.

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Yes, Monty, QUIT PLAYING.

Clarke was running through the forest to both escape the Grounders and save Finn, when this happened:

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This girl’s life has been turned upside down!

Wow, you guys. I think I gaped at the screen for a full minute after it went blank. WHAT THE WHAT? So much stuff in this episode is going to give me an ulcer. Be honest - when you started watching The 100, did you think you were going to care about these characters THIS MUCH? I am very worried for all of them, and that’s a testament to everyone involved with this show.

Remember when we all thought Kane was a total villain? What fools we were! For shame, you guys. A plague on all our houses. Kane saved approximately 30 lives in one day, and not all in one shot! He was a life-saving machine, and deserves so many high fives and peanut butter cups.

Well, I am very clearly super pumped for the next episode. I want to know what happens immediately, but maybe the anticipation is half the fun? Ugh, who even knows any more. I’m a mess.

Some Stuff:

“Tomorrow there will be nothing to go back to.” YIKES, you guys! Shit is going to get real.

What do you think Lincoln's abs are up to?

Are you brainstorming ways you can incorporate "Grounder Pounder" into your daily conversations?

Until we meet again!

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