The Andy Griffith Show

Season 5 Episode 4

The Education of Ernest T. Bass

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Aired Monday 9:30 PM Oct 12, 1964 on CBS

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    • (Helen, Andy and Barney are in the courthouse discussing Ernest T.)
      Andy: I got to tell you the truth: I just don't know what to do. I can't put him in jail – he keeps breakin' out. I can't make him understand he's got to leave Helen alone. I don't know what to do with him.
      Barney: Well, you won't listen to me – you won't listen to your old dad. All I have to do is give him a couple of karate chops, flip him into a corner and he'd get up and head back for the mountains, never to be seen again.
      Andy: He'd kill you.
      (Barney looks annoyed)
      Andy: Well, the easiest way is to satisfy him. He wants an education – we'll give him an education. We'll fix him up with a diploma and everything.
      Barney: I still say: five minutes behind the barn!
      Helen: He'd kill you.

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