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Lord Sugar's Aide
Lord Sugar's Aide
Despite owning a business selling beauty products, Susan was unable to sell all of the stock the team purchased on her advice.
Lord Sugar fires Felicity for indecisive leadership, choosing a poor location, and missing the point of the task by focusing on selling cosmetics rather than treatments.
Felicity brings Ellie and Natasha back to the boardroom.
For winning the task, Venture is awarded dance lessons with the cast of Strictly Come Dancing.
The winning team for this task is Venture. It is the team's fourth consecutive win.
Lord Sugar moves Felicity to Logic.
The project managers for this task are Zoe (Venture) and Felicity (Logic).
Lord Sugar: It was all about treatments. And you didn't do any treatments, or hardly any treatments at all.
Jim: We didn't know until half-way through the day that treatments were being neglected.
Felicity: Because we were so busy...
Lord Sugar: Well, from what I've got down here, you started off at eleven o'clock in the morning and from what I've heard from Nick, the first treatment was actually implemented until three-thirty in the afternoon. What the hell was going on for four hours?! You could go for a sleep! Isn't the first principles of any business you've got to do a kind off 'wake-up' call, you know, 'how am I doing today? Have I sold anything today? I've been here since eleven o'clock, are we doing anything?' You wait until the end of the day to find out, or what? Where was your brain?
Tom: After one hour, I was asked to come down.
Melody: Tom went down there, so we were thinking 'OK, great. Well now, something will start shifting.'
Lord Sugar: (To Tom) I heard, from Nick, that when you came down, you spent two minutes talking about treatments, and you started selling products.
Tom: OK, I...
Lord Sugar: Vincent, just before you left, you said this was a shambles. You wanna elaborate on that?
Vincent: Well, you know, we overspent and, erm...we made a loss. That's the, that's the shambles of it. As you know, I'm not here-
Lord Sugar: OK, ok, got that. Thank you for that.
Lord Sugar: I thought you really was being more specific. You were generic when you were saying that.
Melody: Well, I can lay it out quite clearly and honestly.
(At the "loser's cafe")
Tom: Well, I'm personally getting pretty fed up of this place.
Nick: You've done no treatments?
Zoe: Well, we have two treatments in the diary.
Nick: In the diary, but you've done no treatments.
Zoe: We've delivered no treatments, no. (To Felicity) Do you want us to perhaps grab people here and escort them upstairs or...what shall we do?
Felicity: Do you think we'll be able to have one of your up there?
Ellie: I can't do hair, though, that's the only problem.
Felicity: Yeah, I know, but we can just have one of you up there, so we know that the massaging is up there.
Nick: I wouldn't gas about it. I'd get on with it.
(A customer is receiving a massage from Ellie)
Customer: Oh, it's warm!
Ellie: Good, isn't it?
Customer: I've never had a massage from a woman before. It feels different.
Ellie: Haven't ya? Had it from a bloke, have ya?
Customer: Yeah...normally leads to something else!
Ellie: (Laughs) Does it? It won't do this time.
(On Susan's failure to sell the fake tan)
Zoe: Suzie, last night you gave me a very strong phone call and you wanted to push for sixty products.
Susan: This is really, really unfair, because the location...
Zoe: You came up with these optimistic numbers, you're in skin care anyway, so we trusted you, basically.
Susan: This is so unfair, Zoe.
Zoe: No, it's not unfair, Suzie. You've made your bed and you've got to lie in it, I'm afraid. Try and recall it back and try and get the sales. That's all we can do.
Susan: I gave you my advice and you took it.
Helen: You've given Zoe advice and the advice and the advice is now wrong, you've obviously got to take accountability for it.
Zoe: Yeah, you've got to stand by that advice.
Susan: I don't understand why you come here and have a go at me! This is not good for team morale. Yeah, Zoe, I am in skin care. I do sell skin care for a living. I know exactly what I'm doing. I know you've told me to sell and that's exactly what I'm doing.
Zoe: OK, good luck, OK?
Nick: Tom, who I've now called mister notebook hyphen calculator, had all the figures, was writing them down, knew absolutely everything. Where's the real profit made? Selling treatments. What's he doing? He's selling bows! Why? 'Cos it's easier!
(Susan is trying to sell some fake tan)
Susan: OK, so just have a quick look at your wrists. See the difference in my wrists, aswell. We don't look like Oompa-Loompas! Not orange at all! Can I tempt you?
Customer: My boyfriends got my money.
Susan: Oh, come on! Treat yourself! (They walk off, the camera cuts back to Susan) Oh, nobody has any money around here. Everyone seems so poor! (Karren Brady gives her a strange look)
(On selling the fake tan)
Susan: I'm not selling anywhere near I thought I'd be selling.
Leon: You thought six an hour, didn't you?
Leon: It's actually three an hour and that's pushing it aswell.
Karren: (To the camera) Susan put herself forward as the beauty guru, somebody they should listen to, somebody they should trust, somebody who knows this industry inside out. Well, if you set yourself up as something you're not, you're in for a very big fall.
(Glenn, trying to sell cosmetic products)
Glenn: I can't talk you through what they are. I just know they're pretty. You're pretty, so you need to pick yourself a nice complimenting colour. I'll give it to ya for a tenner. (The lady shakes her head) Ten pounds? Oh, you're breaking my heart, Liz!
(Nick, unimpressed with Team Logic's lack of treatment sales)
Nick: There are two sides to the selling. Selling the retail products and selling the treatments. Which makes the most money? The treatments by a mile. Because the treatment upstairs, is as high as ninety percent. It's fantastic. Are they pushing the treatments down here? They haven't mentioned it yet. They're just selling the products.
(Team Venture are learning how to use the spray tan machine by spraying a male test model.)
Leon: The two of you can do it. It's not like, ya know...
Helen: I think for the sake of five minutes, just spray him, Leon. It's only going to be five minutes.
Susan: Just in case.
Leon: I don't think it's necessary.
Susan: Leon! Why the hell are you here then, if you're not going to be doing the treatments?
Leon: Because I'm selling. I'm selling the spray tan.
Susan: It doesn't make you gay!
Leon: Alright...let's get this done then.
(In the car, on the way to learn how to spray tan)
Susan: You're very happy, aren't you? You're going to be spraying naked ladies with fake tan.
Leon: Well it's, you know, it's part of the task isn't it?
(After Leon reluctantly volunteers to try some male cosmetic products)
Zoe: You can tell he looks better, but you couldn't tell he's wearing make-up.
Susan: Yeah, he definitely looks better.
Helen: I can imagine a lot of guys would want to do this but would feel slightly...embarrassed about doing it.
Leon: I felt very uncomfortable during that process.
Pitcher: Did you?
Leon: But only because it's unnatural. (Later, to the team) I can't promote this product. I mean, you know, I've got a girlfriend, and if she started realising that I was wearing make-up...I can't be a part of this.
(Two ladies are pitching their male cosmetic products to Team Venture)
Pitcher: If we could have a volunteer of the male persuasion?
Susan: Come on, Leon! You need it!
Lord Sugar: (Addressing Jim) Oh well Jim, welcome to team Titanic here. You know Vincent and Tom we, we really have to stop meeting like this. You're like a couple of stalkers, as all I keep seeing is you two in the losing team.
Vincent: Tell me about it. It's a shambles.
Lord Sugar: OK, well you go off and talk about your shambles, right, and be back here shortly because one of your is going to be fired. OK? Off you go.
Susan: We don't look like Oompa-Loompas! Not orange at all!
Susan refers to the film Willy Wonka and the Choclate Factory (1971), in which Oompa-Loompas are orange-skinned characters with bright green hair. The film is based on the 1964 novel by Roald Dahl and spawned a remake in 2005, starring Johnny Depp and Freddie Highmore.
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